Mr. Chatywin et al. Posted January 10, 2019 Share Posted January 10, 2019 8 hours ago, Jace, Basilissa said: Count Balerion is one of the other Boys from Brazil. Jace smells like flowers and the sweetest perfumes. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jez Bell Posted January 12, 2019 Share Posted January 12, 2019 Tywin is a really nice guy. Everyone says so. Sometimes he even steals candy from babies, but only the very rich babies, and he gives it to the ones that can't afford dental care. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Knight of Ashes Posted January 14, 2019 Share Posted January 14, 2019 Jez Bell is seriously considering changing her screen name to Jizz Balls. When asked why, she replied enigmatically, "Because it's more appropriate. " Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Raisin' Bran Posted January 15, 2019 Share Posted January 15, 2019 KoA makes prayers to the crone to have a life half as exciting as a slug. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jace, Extat Posted January 16, 2019 Share Posted January 16, 2019 Raisin' Bran once spent 9 days straight howling at the moon. When the local news decided to investigate this odd behavior half the town's populace turned to dust. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mr. Chatywin et al. Posted January 16, 2019 Share Posted January 16, 2019 The reason why Jace disappears for long periods of time from the forum is because she’d trying to replicate the work of Dr. Frankenstein, except she’s reanimating a platypus instead of a human. Early reports indicate the results are quite promising. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Count Balerion Posted January 16, 2019 Share Posted January 16, 2019 Tywin et al. are engaged in a bitter civil war over whether to support the Exalted Brown Slug or the Undead Platypus in the 2020 elections. Why not compromise and elect both? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jace, Extat Posted January 16, 2019 Share Posted January 16, 2019 Despite rumors of a burgeoning Exalted Brown Slug and Undead Platypus superticket, it is becoming clear that Count Balerion is maneuvering Superdelegates towards a Kanye West and Armando Iannucci nomination. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mr. Chatywin et al. Posted January 16, 2019 Share Posted January 16, 2019 Jace is working in the shadows along side Count Balerion to push Kanye West onto the people despite their hatred for him. In an attempt to distract the people so this will succeed, she wrote and recorded the hit song "Baby Shark." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jace, Extat Posted January 17, 2019 Share Posted January 17, 2019 Ty Ty wrote the hit YouTube single FRIDAY for his cousin Rebecca Black. Much to his chagrin, well meaning but misguided forces within his Auntie's house misinterpreted early focus group results and added autotune, thereby sabotaging the project. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mr. Chatywin et al. Posted January 17, 2019 Share Posted January 17, 2019 A younger Jace was once an up and coming popstar named Jacelyn Daggers. She had a few top 40 hits, but her career took a nose dive after she got hooked on drugs. She hit rock bottom when she started mainlining snake venom. Now, older, wiser and clean, she mentors music prodigies she’s signed to her label. Her goal is to become the Suge Knight of popstars. Every day she gets closer to that goal. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Raisin' Bran Posted January 17, 2019 Share Posted January 17, 2019 Tywin has yet to win at anything. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jace, Extat Posted January 18, 2019 Share Posted January 18, 2019 Although Raisin Bran always pays his taxes, as does any good citizen, the local reprobate in charge of the IRS office has long since convinced the poor fellow that his federal dues are required exclusively in Bran. He's eaten nothing but Raisins since 1982. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mr. Chatywin et al. Posted January 18, 2019 Share Posted January 18, 2019 Jace, being a medical professional, has a bit of a god complex. Hidden deep within the bowls of her hospital lays a secret room. In it there are several discarded body parts. Her attempts to make the perfect body have been moving along steadily, but much progress is still to be had. However, there have been great advancements with her re-animator. Three undead cats roam the room. Why they roar instead meow still remains a mystery though. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Knight of Ashes Posted January 19, 2019 Share Posted January 19, 2019 Tywin was so devastated by Kendall Jenner's stories of her struggle with acne that this so convinced him of the utter cruelties and injustices of life and consequently was drained of all will to live and thus, hasn't gotten out of bed since. Not even to go to the bathroom. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Count Balerion Posted January 20, 2019 Share Posted January 20, 2019 KOA is engaged in a scientific project to regalvanise glyptodont fossils and turn them into an army of doom wherewith to conquer the world. His sole purpose for world conquest is to be able to force GRRM to finish the books with an ending in which Jon Snorkgaryen rides a unicorn. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Knight of Ashes Posted January 20, 2019 Share Posted January 20, 2019 Five years ago, Count Balerion was so sure that Martin would have finished Winds of Winter by 2016 that he bet both his testicles. 'Nuff said. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jace, Extat Posted January 20, 2019 Share Posted January 20, 2019 5 hours ago, Knight of Ashes said: Five years ago, Count Balerion was so sure that Martin would have finished Winds of Winter by 2016 that he bet both his testicles. 'Nuff said. Knight of Ashes keeps all the testicles won in his bets against George, and nature, inside a series of clear glass boxes. Clear glass boxes that he displays on his mantlepiece. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Raisin' Bran Posted January 21, 2019 Share Posted January 21, 2019 Jace's longtime ambition has been to sit on a triumverant as judge to an accused regicide. She then plans to offer to champion for the accused in a trial by combat, then lose on purpose. Yes she will be dead, but the look of betrayal on the condemned's face will totally be worth it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Count Balerion Posted January 22, 2019 Share Posted January 22, 2019 RB has been trying for years to open a restaurant sspecialising in Spicy Singer Stew and Jumbo Jojen Paste. So far, no takers. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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