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The Fattest Leech

Rant & Rave Season 8 [Spoilers]: When you are cool like a cucumber, as evil as the mother of madness, but never as perfect as the pet!

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2 minutes ago, kissdbyfire said:

Show Cersei is so unlike book Cersei that she’s Carol. Sansa is Sandra, Jaime is Larry. And so on.

Oh right. Sorry, I'm not in the in-joke club.

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Just now, House Cambodia said:

Oh right. Sorry, I'm not in the in-joke club.

There’s no club other than the rant club. Those nicknames are being used since s 5. There was even an award “show”, where many Oscars Carols were given.

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1 minute ago, House Cambodia said:

Oh right. Sorry, I'm not in the in-joke club.

There's also Brute (Brienne), Saint Tyrion of course.

Cersei actually has 2 names: Carol (if it's the mama loves her children) or Sheryl (when she's romulan)

It was hilarious when in the introduction scene of Lyanna Mormont, little Lyanna actually used "Sandra" as name towards Sansa, when we called her that since s5.

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It just doesn't make a whole lotta sense to me that the wildlings would want to return to the far north. I suppose in the show world the white walker threat has been eliminated so the coast is clear...

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Does anybody remember who else was leading an army along side Jon when they left Winterfell? It's been driving me nuts, but not enough to replay the episode to find out.

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1 minute ago, Feather Crystal said:

It just doesn't make a whole lotta sense to me that the wildlings would want to return to the far north. I suppose in the show world the white walker threat has been eliminated so the coast is clear...

On the one hand, the North (i.e. south of the Wall) is desperately underpopulated, like Europe after the Black Death, and there would be plenty of good land for them to settle. On the other hand I can understand Tormund saying they want to go home. The Wilding population is also pretty much wiped out - can we assume every Wilding who stayed north of the Wall was zombified? With no WW threats or even threats from other Wildings, they should be fine.

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2 minutes ago, Feather Crystal said:

Does anybody remember who else was leading an army along side Jon when they left Winterfell? It's been driving me nuts, but not enough to replay the episode to find out.

What left from the Army of the Vale? Yohan Royse had been around in episode 1 or 2. Either he's still there or popped over to the Vale to round up the rest of their army. Wouldn't be surprised to see idiot SweetRobyn join the party.

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4 minutes ago, Feather Crystal said:

Does anybody remember who else was leading an army along side Jon when they left Winterfell? It's been driving me nuts, but not enough to replay the episode to find out.

Davos? I’m not sure. The show is so forgettable I usually forget stuff while they’re happening! :D

 

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1 minute ago, kissdbyfire said:

Davos? I’m not sure. The show is so forgettable I usually forget stuff while they’re happening! :D

 

He should have been with the fleet. Did we see him get washed up (again)?

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Just now, House Cambodia said:

He should have been with the fleet. Did we see him get washed up (again)?

No idea... like I said, so damn forgettable. :dunno:

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Posted (edited)
On 5/6/2019 at 3:07 PM, Mindwalker said:

"She’s too strong for him. She’ll bend him to her will.”
So, good King material, right?

It is good King material if you are the one who wants to do the bending, which Varys definitely does. Him and Tyrion could control him easily, is probably his thinking.

Edited by Xemi

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Ah, the show that could have been.

  • We could see Sansa being a good leader and being strategic without being a snarky, eye rolling asshole.
  • We might have seen Arya play the lying game with Sansa and Jon, give her some longer scenes where these skills can help tease out some character and plot points.
  • Military battles that aren't brutally stupid in every single element would have been nice.
  • Direwolves.  I can't believe anyone actually believes for 1 second that a 15 million per episode series can't afford CGI for wolves, it's absurd.
  • The wolves will come again, I dreamed it.
  • If as it looks, Dany goes down, we might have had a legitimately great tragic arc instead of a bizarro melt down in the span of 2 episodes.
  • We might have even gotten a heroic Jon Snow who isn't dumb as a box of rocks and getting people killed left and right.
  • We  might have gotten a Cersei who is wild, paranoid, unpredictable and angry, instead of the dull, dull no emotion queen we've seen for years.

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2 hours ago, kissdbyfire said:

There’s no club other than the rant club. Those nicknames are being used since s 5. There was even an award “show”, where many Oscars Carols were given.

Good times.

Mind you, being reminded of "Olly, bring me my sword," is kind of triggering. :commie:

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2 minutes ago, Ser Quork said:

Mind you, being reminded of "Olly, bring me my sword," is kind of triggering.

Oh yes, triggering to a very uncomfortable degree. No “Edd, fetch me a block”, that is so iconic and awesome and we were all waiting to get. Just cuz David and Dan’s ideas are so much better than book stuff - solely in their minds, of course, but since they’re the ones running the show... And also because Olly. Fucking Olly. Yikes. 

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I actually don't have a problem with the Olly character conceptually. Orphan whose parents were killed by wildings joins the NW and hates wildlings, could have been an interesting story.

The execution by D&D however, was so hamfisted and atrocious. And that's what's really been the problem with the show, since GRRM only shared with them the ending as concepts, and D&D are forced to actually execute by bringing those concepts to screen, they are utterly incapable of doing it well.

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Not sure what to say about this week's episode.  Why would Carol and Urine know who Missnobody is out of all the people jumping ship?  Why would they know to use her as a leverage point?  Why would Carol do the dumbest thing possible just to stoke and antagonize the dipshit army led by dipshit Snow and dipshit Dragon Brat?

Jon leaving Ghost without even saying goodbye?  Right.

Tyrion and Varys almost had a conversation resembling something they would have done several seasons ago, except everything Mr. Cleverer than You said was completely batshit stupid.

Here's the scary part to me.  This was, by far, the best episode of this season.  And believe me, I entirely intend that to be damning with faint praise.  At least they TRIED to write some dialog.  They sucked AND blew at it, but at least they tried.

"Which one of your cowards shit my pants?"  That and puppy dog eyes as he sees Jamie traipsing after Breinne will forever be all Toromund is to me now.

And how the bloody hell did Jamie know Toromund was sad after she left.  He followed along behind her like a lost child?

And we finally got around to admitting there's a Starbucks in Westeros.  Nice job D&D, not even keeping modern cups off the damn table during shooting, and not giving enough of a shit to clean it up in post.

That right there tells you where their heads are.  Get it done.  Who gives a shit?

I can't even get stoked up to give it one of my usual epic rants.  Two episodes left and we've broken down all the characters to know-nothing smirking, snarking idiots.  But hey, at least Emilia Clarke got to emote a little bit this week.  That's the first time in a tremendously long time that's happened.

Maybe the Ds are doing us a favor.  Who among is could honestly say we'll miss the show when it's gone?  I miss the show now, because the show's not the show, it's just a shitty crap parody that can't even find its comedy legs.

Two more episodes.  How much else will they screw up?

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6 hours ago, Cas Stark said:

If as it looks, Dany goes down, we might have had a legitimately great tragic arc instead of a bizarro melt down in the span of 2 episodes.

Remember how back in the early part of Season 5 - after being pretty shaky with his portrayal for a few years - they not only portrayed Stannis well but actually went as far as to make him even more likable than he was in the books? And then as soon as he pulled a total 180 and burned Shireen it became clear that D&D only made him more likable early on so it would up the shock value when he did the bad thing?

It's starting to hit me that Danys show arc is basically this but stretched out over an entire series.

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Who even cares about the Iron Throne anymore when the political side of this series has been garbo for years, they had one shot to make the ending of this series okay-ish by focusing on the Long Night and they absolutely blew it, people cared about the politics plot when it has a shred of depth to it, now Cersei can blow up half the nobility of Highgarden with no consequences and reign as queen because she says she is, literally all they have to do is have Arya stab her and that's that, the lords, the armies... none of it matters because they've been sidelined, for fuck's sake Asha just retook the Iron Islands offscreen, no biggie. I've disliked most of this show for a long time but it's absolutely terrible now outside of the CGI spectacle, do the people making it even care? 

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