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Ser Uncle P

5 wackiest Crackpot "theories"

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Let's see what the 5 wackiest "theories" you've seen posted here. (Or another ASOIAF/GOT related forum). Has to be some genuine effort put into it to convince other posters. I've put the links to all 5 below...

 1. The Mountain was working for House Tully. (My personal favourite)

2. Tywin Lannister is the dusky woman Victarion is sleeping with on his voyage. 

3. Martin's world is the 5th age of Tolkiens Middle Earth. 

4. Varys is a Blackfyre woman and is Joffreys mother to boot. 

5. Craster is Rhaegar!!!

 

 

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Love the topic but can't compete with perfection :D  

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3 hours ago, Ser Uncle P said:

Let's see what the 5 wackiest "theories" you've seen posted here. (Or another ASOIAF/GOT related forum). Has to be some genuine effort put into it to convince other posters. I've put the links to all 5 below...

 1. The Mountain was working for House Tully. (My personal favourite)

2. Tywin Lannister is the dusky woman Victarion is sleeping with on his voyage. 

3. Martin's world is the 5th age of Tolkiens Middle Earth. 

4. Varys is a Blackfyre woman and is Joffreys mother to boot. 

5. Craster is Rhaegar!!!

Yes.  But which of these do you actually support?

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Posted (edited)

Have to agree w/ all who said the 5 listed in the OP are outrageously awesome. 

But I have to say, 5 is not nearly enough to even begin to cover the most insane creative crackpots out there. Let's see...

- character x is in fact character y

- the 3EC is (take your pick):

a) Old Nan

b) Shiera Seastar - sorry @Megorova

c) the NK

(Damn, I'm drawing a blank here, but there are so many more... )

- Jon is the son of anything that's not R+L and who wrote the PL is anyone other than Ramsay - easy, only joking! :P

ETA: Something went terribly wrong there w/ the strikethrough

Edited by kissdbyfire

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4 hours ago, Ser Uncle P said:

Let's see what the 5 wackiest "theories" you've seen posted here. (Or another ASOIAF/GOT related forum). Has to be some genuine effort put into it to convince other posters. I've put the links to all 5 below...

 1. The Mountain was working for House Tully. (My personal favourite)

2. Tywin Lannister is the dusky woman Victarion is sleeping with on his voyage. 

3. Martin's world is the 5th age of Tolkiens Middle Earth. 

4. Varys is a Blackfyre woman and is Joffreys mother to boot. 

5. Craster is Rhaegar!!!

 

 

Congratultions Uncle P.  You are correct about one thing.  They are wacky.  :)

 

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These are good, I can add more!

 

1. Rickon is the love child of Hodor and Catelyn

2. Varys is a merman 

3. Tyrion is Dany/Drogo's time-traveling fetus

4. Howland Reed is the High Sparrow

5. Daenerys is a secret Targaryen (not an actual theory but a hilarious post mocking reddit theories)

6. Ned warged into a pigeon after he died

7. Roose is a vampire

 

I'd pay good money to watch GRRM read the most outrageous ASoIaF theories - just to see his reactions.

 

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1. Mance is Rhaegar, or Arthur Dayne.

2. Dany is daughter of Rhaegar and Lyanna.

3. Tyrion is a Targaryen.

4. Bloodraven is the Three-Eyed Crow. :rolleyes:

5. Rhaego is dead. :bs:

6. Jon is permanently dead, and if he will even return into the plot of ASOIAF, then it will be only in the wolf's form, warged into Ghost.

7. Bran is able to timetravel, he is Bran the Builder and all other Brans from the history, and also the Three-Eyed Crow, which is Bran's version from the future. :stunned:

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44 minutes ago, Megorova said:

1. Mance is Rhaegar, or Arthur Dayne.

2. Dany is daughter of Rhaegar and Lyanna.

3. Tyrion is a Targaryen.

4. Bloodraven is the Three-Eyed Crow. :rolleyes:

5. Rhaego is dead. :bs:

6. Jon is permanently dead, and if he will even return into the plot of ASOIAF, then it will be only in the wolf's form, warged into Ghost.

7. Bran is able to timetravel, he is Bran the Builder and all other Brans from the history, and also the Three-Eyed Crow, which is Bran's version from the future. :stunned:

Ah yes, you reminded me of a total crackpot that I didn’t list: Rhaego is alive! 

But I agree w/ you on #s 1 & 7. 

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Discounting obvious troll theories to inexplicably popular nonesense 

1) Rhaego lives

2) Brandon + Ashara = Jon

3) Quentyn lives

4) Dany coming to stand beside Drogon at the end of DwD can somehow be interpreted as Drogo having flown off and left her

5) Anything written by Megarova

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1. Varys is Santa and his little birds are elves.

2. Roose Bolton is Elvis.

3. Melisandre is  queen Rhaella.

4. Children "hired" Kyuubi to deliver those hammers of water.

5. Castelry Rock is actually Stone of Tear from Wheel of Time.

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2 hours ago, Megorova said:

Bran is . . . the Three-Eyed Crow

"The wolf dreams are no true dreams. You have your eye closed tight whenever you're awake, but as you drift off it flutters open and your soul seeks out its other half. The power is strong in you."

Bran's dreams are his soul seeking out his other half (or halves?).

"There's different kinds," he said slowly. "There's the wolf dreams, those aren't so bad as the others. I run and hunt and kill squirrels. And there's dreams where the crow comes and tells me to fly. Sometimes the tree is in those dreams too, calling my name. That frightens me. But the worst dreams are when I fall."

And in Jojen's dream Bran is a "winged wolf" and Bran dreams of wolves and crows--he is half wolf, half crow, and half boy--the wolf with crow wings.  And Bran's name means crow. 

And Brandon the Builder founded the Night's Watch and they are called crows.

"Are you really a crow?" Bran asked.

 

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16 hours ago, Platypus Rex said:

Yes.  But which of these do you actually support?

Mountain working for House Tully is a lot more tantalising than hidden targs and faked deaths lol

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4 hours ago, Ser Uncle P said:

Mountain working for House Tully is a lot more tantalising than hidden targs and faked deaths lol

From all we've seen from House Tully, they seem more like pawns than players in the game of thrones so far. It's a fun theory but can't possibly be true.

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18 hours ago, Rose of Red Lake said:

6. Ned warged into a pigeon after he died

This one made me laugh out loud :D

I'm afraid I can't contribute to this thread cause thankfully I haven't seen a lot of wacky theories, and when I do I quickly forget them lol

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In no particular order

5- Everyone is a secret Targ

4- Ned isn't dead

3- Rhaegar is Mance Rayder

2- Domeric Bolton was Brandon Stark's bastard son 

1- Jon is the bastard Lyanna and Ned

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12 minutes ago, Eddard Waters said:

Jon is the bastard Lyanna and Ned

Here we’d need subcategories...

”Jon is the son of...”

a) Ned

b) Brandon

c) Benjen

(gotta say though, haven’t seen Lyanna and Rickard as a possibility yet... I must have missed it :lol: )

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