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Jace, Basilissa

NFL Offseason 2019: Gettleman Browns all over the Giants

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On 3/26/2019 at 9:48 AM, Tywin et al. said:

Today I heard multiple sources compare Gronk’s and Gonzalez’s average yards per target. The difference is staggering, and not just because of the two. Gonzalez average yards gain per target is 7.5. That’s an incredible number, a... 

Jerry Rice ...  8.5 yards per target...

Terrell Owens ... 8.5 yards per target....

Randy Moss ... 8.yards per target ...

Calvin Johnson ... 8.9 yards per (target).

OBJ is averaging 8.8 yards per target. So is Antonio Brown.

DeAndre Hopkins ... 8.3 yards per target for his career.

Julio Jones (is) ... averaging 9.8 for his career.

 

On 3/26/2019 at 9:48 AM, Tywin et al. said:

Gronk averages 9.9 yards per target. 

That's fucking insane.  As a single stat (and we can agree no player's talent is buried in a single stat.... I mean except Brett Favre who threw more INTs than nay person walking the planet) this does speak volumes not just how effective Gronk was, but how he was able to make so many catches for yards and how effective he was after the catch.  

I still think that its a very close argument with him and Gonzalez, but this does add another dimension.  

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2 hours ago, Rockroi said:

 

That's fucking insane.  As a single stat (and we can agree no player's talent is buried in a single stat.... I mean except Brett Favre who threw more INTs than nay person walking the planet) this does speak volumes not just how effective Gronk was, but how he was able to make so many catches for yards and how effective he was after the catch.  

I still think that its a very close argument with him and Gonzalez, but this does add another dimension.  

I obviously haven’t done the calculations for every great receiver, but I’m guessing there’s a decent chance that Gronk’s ratio might be the highest, which means he is the most efficient receiver, regardless of position, of all time. I’ve also heard numerous analysts say that Gronk might be the best blocking tight end ever. When you combined those two things, it’s hard to argue that Gonzalez is debatable. Give me overwhelming dominance over longevity all day, every day.

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52 minutes ago, Tywin et al. said:

I obviously haven’t done the calculations for every great receiver, but I’m guessing there’s a decent chance that Gronk’s ratio might be the highest, which means he is the most efficient receiver, regardless of position, of all time. I’ve also heard numerous analysts say that Gronk might be the best blocking tight end ever. When you combined those two things, it’s hard to argue that Gonzalez is debatable. Give me overwhelming dominance over longevity all day, every day.

Chris Ballard mentioned on Florio's podcast yesterday how often Gronk would scoop balls out of the dirt and he was totes on point. It seemed like once a drive at times the defense would blast through on Brady in a heartbeat only for him to squeeze the ball in Gronk's direction for the mammoth to get those Terminiator hooks on the damn thing an inch above the grass and just stumble forward like a careening semi truck for the first down.

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7 minutes ago, DanteGabriel said:

Gronk is the Jim Brown of tight ends.

With more frat parties and less domestic violence.

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Fox Sports is reporting that the Cardinals have an offer in hand of a second round pick for Josh Rosen, but are holding out for a first.  Interested teams are the Chargers, Patriots and Giants.  I'm guessing if it were the Giants, the Cardinals would already have taken it because it is "close enough" to a first.  They can't believe they can get a top half of the first round pick for him, can they?

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3 hours ago, Jace, Basilissa said:

Chris Ballard mentioned on Florio's podcast yesterday how often Gronk would scoop balls out of the dirt and he was totes on point. It seemed like once a drive at times the defense would blast through on Brady in a heartbeat only for him to squeeze the ball in Gronk's direction for the mammoth to get those Terminiator hooks on the damn thing an inch above the grass and just stumble forward like a careening semi truck for the first down.

He had an incredible catch where he reached one arm backwards to snag the ball out of the air. it was insane.

2 hours ago, DanteGabriel said:

Gronk is the Jim Brown of tight ends.

 

1 hour ago, briantw said:

With more frat parties and less domestic violence.

Time will only tell if Gronk does a Playgirl nude spread. 

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13 minutes ago, Bronn Stone said:

Fox Sports is reporting that the Cardinals have an offer in hand of a second round pick for Josh Rosen, but are holding out for a first.  Interested teams are the Chargers, Patriots and Giants.  I'm guessing if it were the Giants, the Cardinals would already have taken it because it is "close enough" to a first.  They can't believe they can get a top half of the first round pick for him, can they?

I have a hard time seeing Murray as a long term franchise QB. I would be too afraid he'd be injury prone, plus he was a starter for only a year. I'm also still high on Rosen, and it's undeniable that the Cardinals have numerous holes to fill. I think the smart move would be to find a team that's really high on him and trade the pick for a massive haul. 

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18 minutes ago, Bronn Stone said:

Fox Sports is reporting that the Cardinals have an offer in hand of a second round pick for Josh Rosen, but are holding out for a first.  Interested teams are the Chargers, Patriots and Giants.  I'm guessing if it were the Giants, the Cardinals would already have taken it because it is "close enough" to a first.  They can't believe they can get a top half of the first round pick for him, can they?

I could see the Pats giving up their #32 in a package, maybe even the Chargers if they get antsy.

It may only be a couple of picks, but there are big advantages to it being a 1st. Namely 5th year option.

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5 minutes ago, Tywin et al. said:

 I think the smart move would be to find a team that's really high on him and trade the pick for a massive haul. 

Wouldn't that be nice?

I think you are as likely to have Santa Claus bring you the Easter Bunny for Halloween.

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6 minutes ago, Bronn Stone said:

Wouldn't that be nice?

I think you are as likely to have Santa Claus bring you the Easter Bunny for Halloween.

Per Nightmare Before Christmas, it is technically possible. 

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I think you have a better chance of getting a big haul by trading the pick that can become Murray.  The stigma about prospects from previous years is a real thing.

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1 minute ago, Bronn Stone said:

I think you have a better chance of getting a big haul by trading the pick that can become Murray.  The stigma about prospects from previous years is a real thing.

That's what I meant. Sorry if it was confusing. Rosen was one of the two QBs I was high on last year, and I would grade his rookie year at all because that roster was trash.

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5 hours ago, briantw said:

With more frat parties and less domestic violence.

Personally, I am looking forward to some gloriously cheesy Gronxploitation action flicks.

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I'm leaning more towards disliking the pi challenge rule. So much of that stuff is borderline in real time, and when slowed down, will look worse for the aggressor. I would be more ok with booth reviews only in last two minutes of game if it needs to be reviewed. We will see how it goes. Only confirmed for 2019. 

Jordy Nelson retired today. Saw Mr. Big Chest strut through the door and decided to call it quits. Can't blame him. He finished with 613/8,587/72 in 11 seasons, 1 SB (against us unfortunately). Not sure about him and HoF. I think he falls into the category of damn good player, but does that = HoF? He and Rodgers were a great tandem for a number of years, but let's not confuse them as Manning and Harrison, or even Wayne. Hell, Isaac Bruce finished with 1,024/15,208/91 and 1 SB and can't get in. Not sure how a guy like that can't get into HoF and we have people talking about Edelman getting in after the last SB. Such a weird science.  For me, Nelson is not HoF'er. 

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4 hours ago, Tywin et al. said:

I have a hard time seeing Murray as a long term franchise QB. I would be too afraid he'd be injury prone, plus he was a starter for only a year. I'm also still high on Rosen, and it's undeniable that the Cardinals have numerous holes to fill. I think the smart move would be to find a team that's really high on him and trade the pick for a massive haul. 

Yeah, the main question with Murray is durability in my mind.  

No question to me that he can be a franchise QB if he can stay healthy and gets a coach who is willing to incorporate Air Raid.  When I see a guy complete almost 70% of his passes on 99th percentile YPA, I think that's a guy who can win you games in the NFL.

But we saw how different Baker Mayfield looked with Todd Haley calling plays compared to Freddie Kitchens.  He went from playing poorly but showing some great flashes to playing like a top ten quarterback.  Murray's going to need a coach who is willing to design the offense around what he does well.  

That's also why I think he's a good fit for the Cardinals.  They happen to have a coach who runs a perfect offense for Murray.

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On 3/27/2019 at 10:08 PM, l2 0 5 5 said:

Jordy Nelson retired today. Saw Mr. Big Chest strut through the door and decided to call it quits. Can't blame him. He finished with 613/8,587/72 in 11 seasons, 1 SB (against us unfortunately). Not sure about him and HoF. I think he falls into the category of damn good player, but does that = HoF? He and Rodgers were a great tandem for a number of years, but let's not confuse them as Manning and Harrison, or even Wayne. Hell, Isaac Bruce finished with 1,024/15,208/91 and 1 SB and can't get in. Not sure how a guy like that can't get into HoF and we have people talking about Edelman getting in after the last SB. Such a weird science.  For me, Nelson is not HoF'er. 

I don't see how he could be truly considered for the HOF. Owens has almost literally double his stats in the same era, with lesser QB's, and he had to wait to get in. 

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3 minutes ago, dbunting said:

I don't see how he could be truly considered for the HOF. Owens has almost literally double his stats in the same era, with lesser QB's, and he had to wait to get in. 

Agreed. Like I said, I think he falls in that category of very good player but not hof worthy.

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Posted (edited)

SUPER BOWL 54 SPOILERS [click to reveal]
 

Spoiler

The NFC Team (which one?  who cares. does it really matter?  Oh fine let's just say it's the Vikings or whatever) connect on a deep pass that gives them a 1st and Goal in the waning moments of the 4th Quarter.  Then, like idiots who haven't watched the last decade of NFL football, they throw for the end zone on 1st down and score as quickly as possible instead of correctly recognizing the need to bleed clock under football's new offense-tilted rules.  Seriously, The Eagles won that Super Bowl specifically because they're the only team that's figured out that you now need to play to get the last shot, just like in basketball, otherwise you lose as soon as you give Brady the ball back.  Anyway, the NFC's Designated Jabroni Team scores the Kiss Of Death go-ahead TD with 2:10 left.  Joe Buck, scratching at his sad attempt at beardgrowth, asks "DID THEY LEAVE TOO MUCH TIME FOR TOUCHDOWN TOM?" because in broadcasting, even asinine rhetorical questions are considered less offensive than dead air.

Anyway after 10 minutes of commercials, the ensuing kickoff, and 10 more minutes of commercials, the Jabronis field a prevent defense because they aren't really trying to win.  This is not a legitimate athletic competition, it's the WWE with better-protected Kayfabe.  Anyway, Tom Brady completes a couple passes to to his corps of generic White Receivers to move the ball just past midfield with about 1:30 left.  Then, a glimmer of hope in this brutal hellscape dimension we call home!  Maybe age has finally started to catch up with him, but Tom Brady is a step slow in his dropback, the exit angle of his pass is off somehow, and it's INTERCEPTED!  And the DB goes to the turf immediately instead of trying to run it back like a dingus and fumbling it back to New England!  The NFC Team has won!  Oliver Twist will get a second bowl of gruel tonight after all!  Hooray!

But...

...The Future Refused To Change....

Tiny at first, like a pinprick, but swelling in pitch and duration until the din shatters your eardrums, the shrill, merciless whine of a whistle.  With the grim smugness of an executioner, Ed Hochuli addresses the crowd, ripping off his ref shirt like Hulk Hogan circa 1987, to show off his muscles.

"New England," he bellows, as he cycles through the regulation poses of international bodybuilding competition, "has challenged the ruling on the field, asserting there was pass interference by the defense!"

The neutral observers and fans of the NFC team sink their heads as one.  A disquietingly loud shuffle reverberates through the stadium as everyone moves at once to grab their coats and start walking to the exit.  The hotels and the airport are nearby, but it's still worth trying to beat the traffic.  They know what's coming.  Everyone knows what's coming.

The stadium is already 1/3 empty by the time the reversal is announced.  2/3s empty by the time Brady hits rookie receiver Chester McWhiteboy for the game winning touchdown.  The Patriots win 27-24.  Confetti falls from the rafters to cover up the blood as the Patriots' fanbase riots in triumph yet again.  Goats are slaughtered and just left to rot.  Flies swarm as thick as fog around them.  Joe Buck throws to sideline reporter Erin Andrews, poised to ask Tom Brady how this feels now after having only done this 37 times before.  Silent at first, Brady's smile stretches to an inhuman length.  He rips off his human being mask to reveal the lizard person underneath.  "WHERE IS YOUR GOD NOW, INSECTS" he bellows before flicking his tongue out at Erin Andrews' face.

"No, no, not my hair Ned loves my hair..." she stammers her last as the acidic saliva dripping from the lizard person's tongue dissolves her face.

 "I AM XENU THE UNCONQUERABLE, DELIVER YOUR SEEDLINGS UNTO ME IN TRIBUTE FOR I DEMAND IT."  Then he hands the Lombardi Trophy and Erin Andrews' microphone to Robert Kraft, who protests his innocence vows to fight the human trafficking charges and demand an apology from Roger Goodell when this is all over. "I AM FRIENDS WITH THE DREAD LORD DONALD, YOU CAN'T TOUCH ME!" he shrieks. The field looks like a GWAR concert gone horribly wrong.  Bucketfuls of blood and piss everywhere.  Bill Belichek drinks what appears to be red wine from a goblet fashioned from Andy Reid's skull two weeks previous.  Kraft, speaking backward and fluently in ancient Sumerian, calls to Release The Cobras.  Mercy and Succor are found only in the dictionary.  This is the evil parallel universe.  Your lot is to suffer and bleed and die on the command of your overlords, pathetic ant.  Don't forget to drink Pepsi.

A week later, Goodell will notice ratings were down 1/10th of a point from last year and decide the solution is to institute a rules change that requires all defensive backs to hop on one foot while covering receivers.  Using both of your legs is Illegal Contact (with the turf) which shall be penalized by 5 yards, cutting off one finger Yakuza style, and an automatic first down.

TL;DR; so I'm not optimistic about the efficacy of the rule change, clearly.

Edited by Frances Bean Corbray

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