Small unworthy things - as you were

[Lizard Queen]

Hehe

 

Spoiler

Nevermind C:

 

[maarsen]

On 10/21/2019 at 7:23 PM, Lizard Queen said:

Thanks. I agree with your post. And haha, yeah no, not going into dramatics. I don't think it will come to any extreme measures either. 

 

Maarsen, I don't feel too worried about anything now -- I do think it was probably awkward wording from a person with no harm intended. But when I initially decscribed the letter to others without showing it, they truly said "That is seriously creepy. Watch your back!" which scared me. Hearing "that's creepy" from several people put me on edge since there is some room to interpret the letter in a creepy way. 

LQ, I am glad that all is good with you now. When you posted the note, I could just feel the shyness behind it. I guess it was not as evident to others. When posting here I will try hard to be respectful and not creepy.

[Lizard Queen]

5 hours ago, maarsen said:

LQ, I am glad that all is good with you now. When you posted the note, I could just feel the shyness behind it. I guess it was not as evident to others. When posting here I will try hard to be respectful and not creepy.

Thanks. FWIW, you've seemed like a nice person to me, not someone creepy. 

[BigFatCoward]

13 hours ago, maarsen said:

LQ, I am glad that all is good with you now. When you posted the note, I could just feel the shyness behind it. I guess it was not as evident to others. When posting here I will try hard to be respectful and not creepy.

That's a pretty low bar. 

[maarsen]

3 hours ago, BigFatCoward said:

That's a pretty low bar. 

Every time the phrase of a low bar comes up, I think back to the Monty Python sketch 'The Upper Class Twit of the Year'. One skill was to jump over a line of matchboxes. That was a low bar I hope I can cross. 

[williamjm]

One of my colleagues sent a message that he wouldn't be in to work today because he was taking 'sock leave', which I think is an excellent typo. I'm sure we've all had days when the amount of socks has just got too overwhelming.

[DMC]

Don't know where I put this story..think this is the most appropriate place.  So I was teaching a class this morning and I noticed one student in the back was clearly asleep, or at least in a sleeping posture.  This is not too uncommon when teaching intro undergrad classes, so I didn't want to call her out and embarrass her, especially after I saw she still had her eyes open so I think she was just bored about the discussion of Howard Zinn's 9 fallacies on law and order (something I can empathize with).

A couple minutes later, as I put them all in discussion groups, those around her tell me something's wrong.  She passed out for a bit and was still very disoriented upon waking up.  At that point I'm like "shit!"  We had some training on what to do in such a situation, but I don't remember the numbers I'm supposed to call.  I tell my students to get their phones out and find out the numbers to either campus police or the health center - because I know the students will be quicker about it than my old ass.  And one was, called the health center first.  Health center said to call campus police.

It was probably 5 minutes tops between everybody realizing there was a problem and the campus police showing up.  But goddamn, it felt like an eternity.  I've dealt with a situation similar to this once before when I was teaching community college, but the student stayed passed out so it was a clear problem - and the building I was teaching in was only one floor that was crawling with campus security so all I had to do was go out in the hall and yell "hey, help."  

This was different.  In that meantime, some of the students were saying "maybe we should call 911."  But she was cognizant and responsive at that point so I don't think that's necessary.  OTOH, I'm the farthest thing from a doctor, what if this is an emergency situation?  I decided the campus police should be sufficient, and they were, and their response time was excellent, and then came the barrage of people that happen when you call the campus police.  20 minutes later she seemed fine and was refusing to be admitted against the EMS' and doctor's advice. 

Had to cancel half the classtime, but it really made me think.  I was sweating bullets in those five minutes.  I knew I had to make the right decision, but I really wasn't sure what the right decision was.  No amount of training would have helped me with that, btw.  Anyway, she's already emailed me since, and she's fine.  So that's great.  I just wish I could have been better at making sure of that.

[mcbigski]

You ever notice how when you want to quote and reply to 4 different posts nothing happens but when you want to reply to one five things get quoted?  Or is it just me?

[Sophelia]

17 hours ago, DMC said:

Don't know where I put this story..think this is the most appropriate place.  So I was teaching a class this morning and I noticed ... Had to cancel half the classtime, but it really made me think.  I was sweating bullets in those five minutes.  I knew I had to make the right decision, but I really wasn't sure what the right decision was.  No amount of training would have helped me with that, btw.  Anyway, she's already emailed me since, and she's fine.  So that's great.  I just wish I could have been better at making sure of that.

I can't really think what you could have done differently in the circumstances.  I have been in a similar situation and also felt totally unprepared yet it likewise worked out fine.  It was in a class of around 15 students, and one of the students fainted in her chair which partially held her up.  I felt I had to act as if I was in control, even though (like you) my heart was beating nineteen to the dozen and I was in panic mode, but I didn't want to freak out the other students.  I got her onto the floor and tried to put her in the recovery position, but have had no first aid training so I don't know if I was doing it right.  None of the students had first aid experience either.  I sent a couple of them to get the first aider. It was right at the end of the class so I just reassured the rest of the class that she was OK and would be looked after and let them go.  She came around, wasn't sure why she had fainted.  First aider got an ambulance as a precaution, she was carted off, reported back next day they couldn't find any explanation but probably fatigue as she hadn't been sleeping well.  

After that I asked the university if I could attend first aid training, but they said not unless I was appointed as an official first aider, which made no sense as I worked part-time (apparently the training lasts 3 days and costs the university a lot). I still think the university should do a basic first aid training for its staff. Am still keeping an eye out for an opportunity if I can find a training course which I can afford.

[BigFatCoward]

I often think police officers should carry round a free pass. If you are in public and see something similar to the above and a member of the public is calm and composed, you hand it to them and they get an invite to join and jump the queue. That's all policing is, calm head in a crisis. 

I was in a restaurant once and someone had a heart attack. The manager and all the senior staff were flapping around and this kid from the kitchen, looked about 12 came out and just fucking totally owned the situation. I took over when I realised what was happening, until paramedics arrived. Bit I couldn't help thinking that skinny little fucker would be great police. 

[DMC]

4 hours ago, Sophelia said:

It was in a class of around 15 students, and one of the students fainted in her chair which partially held her up.

Yeah, she was in a weird position too (her right arm was leaning on the empty chair next to her with her head tilted that way), which is probably why I noticed her so quickly, but like I said when I first saw her she had her eyes slightly open and even seemed to make eye contact with me, which I took to mean she was just really bored.  I guess that's the only instructive lesson I can take from the experience - if I see a student in such a manner in the future, I should make sure they're ok rather than ignoring it in an attempt to avoid them any type of embarrassment.

4 hours ago, Sophelia said:

After that I asked the university if I could attend first aid training, but they said not unless I was appointed as an official first aider, which made no sense as I worked part-time (apparently the training lasts 3 days and costs the university a lot). I still think the university should do a basic first aid training for its staff. Am still keeping an eye out for an opportunity if I can find a training course which I can afford.

Luckily there did not appear to be any need for first aid in my case as she regained consciousness very quickly, but yeah that's a very good thought.  I'm almost positive my university wouldn't offer me training for free either (especially because I'm a part time instructor as well), but I'll inquire if there are any reasonable options next week.  

Gotta say the whole thing seemed weird.  She seemed very disoriented immediately after regaining consciousness - and obviously was too right before passing out when I saw her with her eyes open - but within 5-10 minutes she seemed to pretty much completely regain her composure, if still clearly fatigued.  What's even more weird is when the EMS guy asked her if this has happened before she said yes, it sometimes happens when she's in a lot of pain.  And then when the EMS guy if she's ever talked to her doctor about it she said no.  In my head I was like "why the fuck not?" but whatever it's none of my business.

And on that note I felt uncomfortable being there when the EMS and the doctor asked her medical questions like what medications she's on.  There really wasn't any reason for me to stick around, but I felt like somebody should - even though I did have to leave before they were done to get to my next section.  My only contribution was telling the EMS guy she was only passed out for a very brief time and trying to make lame comforting jokes like "don't worry, I'm sure many students have passed out trying to sit through Zinn's book/my lectures."

[Inkdaub]

13 hours ago, DMC said:

Yeah, she was in a weird position too (her right arm was leaning on the empty chair next to her with her head tilted that way), which is probably why I noticed her so quickly, but like I said when I first saw her she had her eyes slightly open and even seemed to make eye contact with me, which I took to mean she was just really bored.  I guess that's the only instructive lesson I can take from the experience - if I see a student in such a manner in the future, I should make sure they're ok rather than ignoring it in an attempt to avoid them any type of embarrassment.

Luckily there did not appear to be any need for first aid in my case as she regained consciousness very quickly, but yeah that's a very good thought.  I'm almost positive my university wouldn't offer me training for free either (especially because I'm a part time instructor as well), but I'll inquire if there are any reasonable options next week.  

Gotta say the whole thing seemed weird.  She seemed very disoriented immediately after regaining consciousness - and obviously was too right before passing out when I saw her with her eyes open - but within 5-10 minutes she seemed to pretty much completely regain her composure, if still clearly fatigued.  What's even more weird is when the EMS guy asked her if this has happened before she said yes, it sometimes happens when she's in a lot of pain.  And then when the EMS guy if she's ever talked to her doctor about it she said no.  In my head I was like "why the fuck not?" but whatever it's none of my business.

And on that note I felt uncomfortable being there when the EMS and the doctor asked her medical questions like what medications she's on.  There really wasn't any reason for me to stick around, but I felt like somebody should - even though I did have to leave before they were done to get to my next section.  My only contribution was telling the EMS guy she was only passed out for a very brief time and trying to make lame comforting jokes like "don't worry, I'm sure many students have passed out trying to sit through Zinn's book/my lectures."

Semi-similar situations happen on my train somewhat regularly.  I had a young girl have a seizure day before yesterday and when I went to help her she was unconscious on the floor.  My help typically amounts to observing if there is in fact a medical emergency and then trying to keep the person secure until paramedics arrive.  It's hard because the other passengers are looking to me to help and so I feel I should be doing more.

The bolded above reminds me of the awkward moment the EMTs tell the person they need to get them off the train so it can continue.  It's like telling them to get their medical problem out of the way.  Or having to ask them how long they will be on the train.  The EMTs are used to it when dealing with the trains, though, and rarely need any prompting.

In other news I am hooked on the coconut water pineapple and mandarin oranges fruit cups.

[HexMachina]

I’ve been on the other side of the fainting scenario a few times (i.e. fainting in public). One memorable occasion i was on a bus during rush hour. Passed out but it was so packed i was basically just left propped up with nobody any the wiser, until a girl who knew me in passing from uni noticed i was a distinctly greyish colour and wasnt responding, so she raised attention and i was promptly shuffled off the bus. Ah, London.

(the girl from my uni got off with me too. I like to think/hope if she hadnt someone would have got me some assistance...)

Another time i was working in retail and passed out behind the tills while serving a customer. My manager was fab, actually. She put me in the recovery position, cleared as much space as possible given the cramped confines of the till banks, and cleared other staff and customers away from me then waited for me to come around while the shopping centre medics came.

Its always very disorientating when you come back around. I’ve never taken further medical treatment afterwards but i usually feel spaced out for the rest of the day. I think the worst is coming to surrounded by people, its somewhat embarassing and unnerving

[Jen'ari]

On 10/25/2019 at 7:25 PM, BigFatCoward said:

I often think police officers should carry round a free pass. If you are in public and see something similar to the above and a member of the public is calm and composed, you hand it to them and they get an invite to join and jump the queue. That's all policing is, calm head in a crisis. 

I was in a restaurant once and someone had a heart attack. The manager and all the senior staff were flapping around and this kid from the kitchen, looked about 12 came out and just fucking totally owned the situation. I took over when I realised what was happening, until paramedics arrived. Bit I couldn't help thinking that skinny little fucker would be great police. 

I always kind of wonder how you guys show the restraint you do in some situations, like dealing with drunk/drugged up people falling out of clubs and being rude or when you’ve got to stand there at protests etc being calm and collected whilst taking a load of shit off the protesters, stuff like that must be really irritating deep down?.

[DMC]

21 hours ago, Inkdaub said:

It's hard because the other passengers are looking to me to help and so I feel I should be doing more.

I can empathize.  After the student regained consciousness I think I probably made an effort to appear more concerned than I actually was because I have been accused in the past during such situations with friends and family of looking like I don't care.

15 hours ago, HelenaExMachina said:

I think the worst is coming to surrounded by people, its somewhat embarassing and unnerving

Yeah, that was definitely on my mind while waiting for the campus police to arrive.  Luckily there was limited crowding - she had a friend that was attending to her (and alerted me to begin with), so pretty much everyone else kept their distance.  But a bunch of students kept asking her if she needed anything/could they do anything.  It obviously comes from the best intentions, but after like the fourth "no," just leave her alone.

44 minutes ago, Bittersweet Distractor said:

I always kind of wonder how you guys show the restraint you do in some situations, like dealing with drunk/drugged up people falling out of clubs and being rude

I'm hardly police, but I do have exhaustive experience in showing restraint during such situations.

[HexMachina]

5 hours ago, Bittersweet Distractor said:

I always kind of wonder how you guys show the restraint you do in some situations, like dealing with drunk/drugged up people falling out of clubs and being rude or when you’ve got to stand there at protests etc being calm and collected whilst taking a load of shit off the protesters, stuff like that must be really irritating deep down?.

Dealing with drunks from behind the bar is bad enough I'd hate to do it as secuirty/doorperson/police. Sometimes it can be pretty nasty and intimidating too, particularly if it happens during a glass sweep when your hands are full so you are even less able to do anything than usual! 

[Jen'ari]

9 hours ago, DMC said:

I can empathize.  After the student regained consciousness I think I probably made an effort to appear more concerned than I actually was because I have been accused in the past during such situations with friends and family of looking like I don't care.

Yeah, that was definitely on my mind while waiting for the campus police to arrive.  Luckily there was limited crowding - she had a friend that was attending to her (and alerted me to begin with), so pretty much everyone else kept their distance.  But a bunch of students kept asking her if she needed anything/could they do anything.  It obviously comes from the best intentions, but after like the fourth "no," just leave her alone.

I'm hardly police, but I do have exhaustive experience in showing restraint during such situations.

What worked for you in those situations?, they must be incredibly frustrating.

4 hours ago, HelenaExMachina said:

Dealing with drunks from behind the bar is bad enough I'd hate to do it as secuirty/doorperson/police. Sometimes it can be pretty nasty and intimidating too, particularly if it happens during a glass sweep when your hands are full so you are even less able to do anything than usual! 

I bet!, I don’t think I’d be a very good barmaid, I don’t have the patience or the right sexual orientation to flirt with the drinkers (well for most bars anyway)

[BigFatCoward]

I went from growing up in Newcastle to working behind a bar at uni to joining the police, I feel like I've been dealing with drunken dickheads my whole life. 

Showing restraint is easy, you know you are going home at the end of your shift, they are going to wake up in a cell, feeling like shit, no access to a fry up or a can of coke to help with the hangover, then loads of inconvenience while their case is dealt with.  You just keep thinking about that and smiling.

[DMC]

19 hours ago, Bittersweet Distractor said:

What worked for you in those situations?, they must be incredibly frustrating.

Well, to be clear, it was kind of a smartass comment.  I generally don't deal with rude drunks outside the bar - or rather when I do, as merely a fellow drunk, that's basically a fight or flight response when someone's confronting you out in the street.  And while shamefully I have to admit I got in a handful of drunken fights when I was 18-21, since then I've been solidly on the flight side (although I can't deny making some smartass comments on occasion as I'm walking away, as long as I'm confident I'm not gonna get my ass kicked for doing so).

What I was really talking about was dealing with rude drunks in the bar - in that case I do have extensive experience.  My usual tack there is a mixture of light-hearted jokes, agreeing with them, and encouraging more mutual drinking until they eventually flip the drunkenness over to the "heys man, yur good peoples."  Oftentimes then the objective becomes extricating yourself from the situation because he probably has his arm around you and wants to do shots.

[Jen'ari]

23 hours ago, BigFatCoward said:

I went from growing up in Newcastle to working behind a bar at uni to joining the police, I feel like I've been dealing with drunken dickheads my whole life. 

Showing restraint is easy, you know you are going home at the end of your shift, they are going to wake up in a cell, feeling like shit, no access to a fry up or a can of coke to help with the hangover, then loads of inconvenience while their case is dealt with.  You just keep thinking about that and smiling.

Yeah that makes sense!, I’m not against people going out drinking and having a good time at all, I’ve enjoyed many a night out it’s just annoying how it turns some otherwise nice people into raging dickheads.

It’s quite funny watching a group of friends who’ve been drinking when you’re sober I think.

23 hours ago, DMC said:

Well, to be clear, it was kind of a smartass comment.  I generally don't deal with rude drunks outside the bar - or rather when I do, as merely a fellow drunk, that's basically a fight or flight response when someone's confronting you out in the street.  And while shamefully I have to admit I got in a handful of drunken fights when I was 18-21, since then I've been solidly on the flight side (although I can't deny making some smartass comments on occasion as I'm walking away, as long as I'm confident I'm not gonna get my ass kicked for doing so).

What I was really talking about was dealing with rude drunks in the bar - in that case I do have extensive experience.  My usual tack there is a mixture of light-hearted jokes, agreeing with them, and encouraging more mutual drinking until they eventually flip the drunkenness over to the "heys man, yur good peoples."  Oftentimes then the objective becomes extricating yourself from the situation because he probably has his arm around you and wants to do shots.

That sounds like a good plan to deal with them and your having a flight response rather than getting involved in a drunken brawl just sounds like maturity and being sensible kicking in .