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Alyn Oakenfist

Weirdest crack ship in the fandom?

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On 5/11/2020 at 4:30 PM, Nagini's Neville said:

Abusive "relationships" are always the worst, but at least Arya and Sansa weren't as close as Jon and Arya. Maybe they weren't so close, because of all of those repressed feelings for each other, you know lol... okay, if you'll excuse me, gotta go puke a little :ack: (i really want a lesbian relationship in asoiaf, but I guess not that much lol)

Typically, such fics involve Arya making a move on Sansa.  Sansa initially tries to resist, but is eventually, betrayed by her body.

The one that makes me want to puke a little is Daenerys/Book Missandei, given that the latter is about 10.

Or indeed, any form of shipping that involves Craster.

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7 hours ago, SeanF said:

Typically, such fics involve Arya making a move on Sansa.  Sansa initially tries to resist, but is eventually, betrayed by her body.

The one that makes me want to puke a little is Daenerys/Book Missandei, given that the latter is about 10.

Or indeed, any form of shipping that involves Craster.

I got to get away from this thread- it gets worse and worse :ack: the "love stories"/sexual relationships in universe are bad enough, but apparently people got an even worse imagination

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I’ve seen Gendry and Arya. I know it’s in the show and I guess you could argue there’s evidence for it in the books, but to me she’s like ten when she met him and he’s like fifteen sooooo ew. 
Also there’s is Sansa and Tyrion which is even worse. And crown jewel of disturbing ships in my opinion is Sansa and Sandor. She’s thirteen! He’s like in his 30s! 
 

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I think some are mentioning their least favourite ships instead of crack ships?
Take Sansa/Tyrion, Sansa/Sandor, Arya/Gendry(?????), etc, there's too much content for them in the books for me to get how any can consider them crack ships. Sansa and Tyrion are literally married, how is that a crack ship?

As for what I would consider the weirdest crack ships: Jon/Sansa, Roose/Catelyn, and all those ships where Sansa and Arya are paired with random grown men like Stannis, Jaime, Tywin, Oberyn etc.
A fun crack ship I've seen is Hot Pie/Sansa, there's nothing wrong with it, it's just some nonsensical bit of fun based on their love for baked goods.

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8 minutes ago, AryaRegina said:

I think some are mentioning their least favourite ships instead of crack ships?
Take Sansa/Tyrion, Sansa/Sandor, Arya/Gendry(?????), etc, there's too much content for them in the books for me to get how any can consider them crack ships. Sansa and Tyrion are literally married, how is that a crack ship?

As for what I would consider the weirdest crack ships: Jon/Sansa, Roose/Catelyn, and all those ships where Sansa and Arya are paired with random grown men like Stannis, Jaime, Tywin, Oberyn etc.
A fun crack ship I've seen is Hot Pie/Sansa, there's nothing wrong with it, it's just some nonsensical bit of fun based on their love for baked goods.

Yeah or Gendry and Sansa, because Jaime said she should get herself a blacksmith. 

My favorite crack ship would be Pod and Sansa- but there is no evidence at all for that in the books

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4 minutes ago, Nagini's Neville said:

Yeah or Gendry and Sansa, because Jaime said she should get herself a blacksmith. 

My favorite crack ship would be Pod and Sansa- but there is no evidence at all for that in the books

Haha, you stumbled upon my least favourite pairing. I'm sorry, but I really, really, really, hate Gendry/Sansa. I would have mentioned it as one of the weirdest crack ships, but it slipped my mind, since I try to forget it even exists, oops. I don't think their personalities work together, they have nothing in common, they would dislike each other, there's the Arya issue, and yeah, not for me.
Sorry, I'm a bit too passionate about this (started back when a really popular fanfic masqueraded itself as a gendrya fic, but then it ended up with Gendry and Sansa married, and I've hated it ever since), nothing wrong if you like it, but it's not for me:)

I like Pod/Sansa though, it's cute! Edric Dayne and Sansa is another one.

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On 3/31/2020 at 8:22 PM, Lady Fevre Dream said:

It's the same thing with good old Nedbert.  Surely you've heard of that one, right?  It cracks me up, but I do think it's a joke, somehow, I'm not certain on the joke part with Jon and Satin.  For me, Ned's descriptions of Robert (in his youth) and Jon's descriptions of Satin are because they happen to be the POV talking about them.  GRRM needs someone to describe them, right?  I think, hope, most people are joking about Nedbert, but and now I realize:

Is there a smoosh name for Jon and Satin?  I don't remember one, LOL 

Since when can you consider a ship a crack ship? 

Nedbert is really one of the most romantic ships... 

"Fifteen years past, when they had ridden forth to win a throne, the Lord of Storm's End had been clean-shaven, clear-eyed, and muscled like a maiden's fantasy."

"The Others take my wife," Robert muttered sourly, but he started back the way they had come, his footsteps falling heavily. "And if I hear 'Your Grace' once more, I'll have your head on a spike. We are more to each other than that."

"this was the Robert Baratheon he'd known and loved. If he could prove that the Lannisters were behind the attack on Bran, prove that they had murdered Jon Arryn, this man would listen. Then Cersei would fall, and the Kingslayer with her, and if Lord Tywin dared to rouse the west, Robert would smash him as he had smashed Rhaegar Targaryen on the Trident. He could see it all so clearly."

The knight - Robert - killing the dragon - Rhaegar - to protect his maiden - Eddard. So romantic :wub: 

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4 hours ago, Tijgy said:

Since when can you consider a ship a crack ship? 

Nedbert is really one of the most romantic ships... 

"Fifteen years past, when they had ridden forth to win a throne, the Lord of Storm's End had been clean-shaven, clear-eyed, and muscled like a maiden's fantasy."

"The Others take my wife," Robert muttered sourly, but he started back the way they had come, his footsteps falling heavily. "And if I hear 'Your Grace' once more, I'll have your head on a spike. We are more to each other than that."

"this was the Robert Baratheon he'd known and loved. If he could prove that the Lannisters were behind the attack on Bran, prove that they had murdered Jon Arryn, this man would listen. Then Cersei would fall, and the Kingslayer with her, and if Lord Tywin dared to rouse the west, Robert would smash him as he had smashed Rhaegar Targaryen on the Trident. He could see it all so clearly."

The knight - Robert - killing the dragon - Rhaegar - to protect his maiden - Eddard. So romantic :wub: 

Absolutely, i've always said it OTP :wub: lol

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52 minutes ago, Nagini's Neville said:

Absolutely, i've always said it OTP :wub: lol

It is known, Robert was and always will be, Ned's "Antlered God", quoting Eddard in love Stark.

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On 3/31/2020 at 8:42 AM, kissdbyfire said:

All of them? 

Got to agree here.

Trying to shoehorn romance into a novel written by the guy who wrote Meathouse Man seems like an exercise in masochism to me.

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13 minutes ago, Eternally_His said:

Eh, I have become increasingly fond of Robboose. That is Dark Dad pairing for you.

Also, Roose in that picture reminds me of Snape for some reason...

Does Roose have a murder fetish? Methinks he does. That, and he got angry that his crush spurned him twice, so he reacted by murdering said crush. In 'if I can't have you, no one will' manner.

 

please NO- that's worse, than Ramsey and Theon :stunned: :crying:

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5 minutes ago, Nagini's Neville said:

please NO- that's worse, than Ramsey and Theon :stunned: :crying:

No means yes. Especially since you betrayed the Order of Sweetie.

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2 minutes ago, Eternally_His said:

No means yes. Especially since you betrayed the Order of Sweetie.

Wait, what? You ship Sweetie with his murderer and somehow I'm the bad guy now? just, because I killed him off in a game of bang, marry, kill this one time?

I'd rather wanted to bang Dacey- she seems great and over 20 and Aegon is a young, innocent, handicapped person- he needs to be protected!!!

Also since when was I part of the Order of Sweetie? :dunno: Hm.... had I known maybe I'd decided differently... wait no I won't have, because Dacey is bae :wub:

Sorry E_H- but there is only place for one Eternally_His :D and that's you of course!!

 

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6 minutes ago, Nagini's Neville said:

Wait, what? You ship Sweetie with his murderer and somehow I'm the bad guy now? just, because I killed him off in a game of bang, marry, kill this one time?

I'd rather wanted to bang Dacey- she seems great and over 20 and Aegon is a young, innocent, handicapped person- he needs to be protected!!!

No, you aren't the bad guy here. Bolton is.

Also, are you saying that Sweetie shouldn't have been protected from big, bad Bolton?

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On 3/31/2020 at 11:35 PM, Alyn Oakenfist said:

Of course it's a crack ship. I was just saying that unlike the other ones that are very uncommon here and only reserved for the dark pits of the internet, the Jon-Satin one seems to have a lot of traction on this forum. Like a couple of weeks ago someone said that since Jon doesn't jack off then he's gay. Like WTF mate? I just can't understand why so many people buy into it.

How is it a crack ship? Jon calls Satin pretty almost every time he sees him. I could see a situation like Dany and Irri, where Jon fools around with Satin because of frustration/boredom.

Hell, Jon seems to like Satin a lot more than Ygritte, where his internal narration was basically like "shes ugly she hasn't washed in 5 weeks and you could break a comb in that hair but she looks kinda ok in this light I guess."

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