Why do people consider Arya and Gendry a potential bad match? (in the future)

[Nagini's Neville]

They are of course still way to young. So we are only talking about possible future potential.  I come across this opinion from time to time. And it's kinda baffling to me, from all of the messed up   and potential messed up relationships, Arya and Gendry would seem to be the most compatible.

They are already great friends, they admire each other and their skills, they complement one another, they are both good in nature and seem to like that life (at least Gendry doesn't seem to mind, Ik they are on the run, so maybe that's not true), they both have a sense about what is important and try to accomplish that, they both are fine with and willing to take on responsibility, they are both leader types, but very important- they are not competitive with each other in that regard, but extremely supportive of one another. They are both very loyal and caring towards each other and others, they are both hard workers and enjoy hard craftsmanship sort of work. They are both very strong- willed, but that doesn't lead to disrespect between them or that one tries to dominate the other, they both are the honest, genuine type. And very important Gendry is not misogynistic towards Arya, but treats her like an equal in a very natural way.  I could go on and on, but IMO they are quite similar (but not too similar), they enjoy the simple and practical life, they have the same values, but most importantly - they really like each other, have each others back, are protective of one another. 

[Springwatch]

I suppose it is a 'bad' match in that it does nothing for the greater glory of House Stark. A waste of the marriage coin, as someone said.

I also wonder how Gendry would react if he was legitimised - made a lord or even a king. Because he really seems to love blacksmithing, which reminds me in a sad way of Robert, who loved being a soldier, but not a king.

[Nagini's Neville]

1 minute ago, Springwatch said:

I suppose it is a 'bad' match in that it does nothing for the greater glory of House Stark. A waste of the marriage coin, as someone said.

I also wonder how Gendry would react if he was legitimised - made a lord or even a king. Because he really seems to love blacksmithing, which reminds me in a sad way of Robert, who loved being a soldier, but not a king.

Sure they are a lot of "what ifs" involved. And they are still kids. Everything can still completely change. But just with what we have so far personality wise IMO they are a great match. I often read "they have nothing in common" and IMO, that couldn't be further from the truth. 

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Because he really seems to love blacksmithing, which reminds me in a sad way of Robert, who loved being a soldier, but not a king.

Maybe he could become a productive good, health version of Bobby. Maybe he would see how much he could make a difference, being in a position of power- without completely giving up his identity and self. IMO making a difference is what he wanted, when he joined the BWB. And he was also very jealous of Ned and upset to be a bastard, while Arya was true-born and a Lady.

 

[dbergkvist]

Arya is a serial killer, and will have killed even more people by the time she's old enough to marry. She is not a good match for anyone.

[Springwatch]

1 minute ago, Nagini's Neville said:

Maybe he could become a productive good, health version of Bobby.

That would be really good to see, and fitting too. The world has gone wrong, but the next generation can get it right.

[frenin]

I don't really like the match, it's too fullfiling to my taste. Any match between Robert's sons and Ned's line is.

But no, there is nothing wrong with them, they are still developing so the incopatibility is meaningless.

[Nagini's Neville]

11 minutes ago, frenin said:

I don't really like the match, it's too fullfiling to my taste. Any match between Robert's sons and Ned's line is.

But no, there is nothing wrong with them, they are still developing so the incopatibility is meaningless.

But what is this incompatibility your are referring to?

[Lord Varys]

They were just people who hung out together under extreme circumstances. George makes it very clear that they have far too less in common - not only the social barriers with Gendry being baseborn - but also in the personality department.

Arya just doesn't need a man at her side who has issues with the fact that she is a highborn lady.

[Nevets]

We seem to have very different views about Gendry.  I have seen no real leadership skills or much in the way of initiative or ambition.  He seemed almost helpless in the woods.  His deference and respect for her was due to her being highborn, as well as knowing a lot more than he did about the outdoors.  And he has no education and no curiosity about the outside world.

On the plus side, they have spend time together and he is a royal bastard, albeit unacknowledged and unknown.

[Darksnider05]

2 hours ago, Lord Varys said:

They were just people who hung out together under extreme circumstances. George makes it very clear that they have far too less in common - not only the social barriers with Gendry being baseborn - but also in the personality department.

Arya just doesn't need a man at her side who has issues with the fact that she is a highborn lady.

Yep I like Gendry but dude has so many insecurities about highborns and trust issues.  Along with being about as curious as a Brick.

[Lord Varys]

48 minutes ago, Darksnider05 said:

Yep I like Gendry but dude has so many insecurities about highborns and trust issues.  Along with being about as curious as a Brick.

One can already see that Arya and Gendry would likely no longer speak the same language, so to speak, with him having become a serious convert to the Lord of Light. Vice versa, Gendry would be horrified if he knew what Arya did since they parted ways. He and Hot Pie were already pretty shocked by what she did when they fled from Harrenhal.

[AryaRegina]

I never got why people dislike them. Like I can get not shipping them, since that can be so personal, but dislike and hate?
They're good friends, they're close in age, they're not afraid to argue and bicker, but they're also able to play around and laugh together. They have each other's back (their first interaction was Gendry telling Hot Pie and Lommy to leave Arya be, and then shouting at Arya to look behind her when Hot Pie was about to throw a rock), and they play off each other very well, like when they teased Hot Pie with the wolves and mummers.

And, sure, they're both insecure, Gendry about being a lowborn bastard, and Arya about feeling unwanted and unattractive, but they're both still young, and will most likely grow out of it.
And Gendry is a hedge knight now, knighted by a lord, that might have helped a little with his insecurities.

32 minutes ago, Lord Varys said:

One can already see that Arya and Gendry would likely no longer speak the same language, so to speak, with him having become a serious convert to the Lord of Light. Vice versa, Gendry would be horrified if he knew what Arya did since they parted ways. He and Hot Pie were already pretty shocked by what she did when they fled from Harrenhal.

Are we forgetting that this is the boy who serves Lady Stoneheart? What has Arya done that would be so horrifying next to that?
And from what I gather, Hotpie was the one shocked and afraid because of the Harrenhal guard, not Gendry:

By the time Hot Pie and Gendry came up with the horses, the rain was falling hard. "You killed him!" Hot Pie gasped.
"What did you think I would do?" Her fingers were sticky with blood, and the smell was making her mare skittish. It's no matter, she thought, swinging up into the saddle. The rain will wash them clean again.
-Arya X, ACOK

Gendry and Hot Pie did not question her choice. She had the map, after all, and Hot Pie seemed almost as terrified of her as of the men who might be coming after them. He had seen the guard she'd killed. It's better if he's scared of me, she told herself. That way he'll do like I say, instead of something stupid.
-Arya I, ASOS

[Nagini's Neville]

27 minutes ago, AryaRegina said:

I never got why people dislike them. Like I can get not shipping them, since that can be so personal, but dislike and hate?
They're good friends, they're close in age, they're not afraid to argue and bicker, but they're also able to play around and laugh together.

Thanks! I never got that either. It's not that I need them to become a romantic couple, not at all. I just don't understand the dislike. Everything that might be "negative" is on the spectrum of completely normal. Nothing to be worried about.

27 minutes ago, AryaRegina said:

Are we forgetting that this is the boy who serves Lady Stoneheart? What has Arya done that would be so horrifying next to that?
And from what I gather, Hotpie was the one shocked and afraid because of the Harrenhal guard, not Gendry:

Exactly, Gendry knows this side of her and it doesn't shock him and he still likes her.

[frenin]

6 hours ago, Nagini's Neville said:

But what is this incompatibility your are referring to?

I don't know really, you should ask to those who talk about it, i'm just saying whatever issues people think there are, they are still kids, they can work them out.

[Moiraine Sedai]

I don't think it's such a bad match in theory. The Starks have lost everything. Gendry has skills to earn a living. A Gendry and Arya couple could live a simple, humble life away from the faceless creeps.  It's too bad because Arya's too damaged to let this happen. She lives for violence and vengeance and will die that way.

[Alexis-something-Rose]

I don't think Arya and Gendry have all that much in common and I think it's a moot point in any case. How many years are going to pass in story before it comes to a close? A year? Two years at the most, unless GRRM decides on a time jump? Arya is currently 11. 

[zandru]

Just remember - a woman needs a man like a fish needs a bicycle. Everybody doesn't need to get "shipped." Also, male-female friendships are possible without marriage, mating, and the whole shippage schtick.

[Nagini's Neville]

1 minute ago, zandru said:

Just remember - a woman needs a man like a fish needs a bicycle. Everybody doesn't need to get "shipped." Also, male-female friendships are possible without marriage, mating, and the whole shippage schtick.

Absolutely I don't ship them ore any characters really. I just came across a lot of dislike recently and wondered where that was coming from- that's all. And I agree Arya doesn't need to end up with anyone (or any character really), but to proclaim the opposite and say it's impossible for her to ever find love, whether forever or just for a while and the only way for her to be a self- actualized or meaningful  character is for her to stay forever alone is IMO just as misguided/toxic than trying to push her into a relationship IMHO

[chrisdaw]

Theirs is a great romance that can not be, they're designed to be perfect for each other in character but an untenable match in Westeros society.

They will have a love child and Arya will have to give it up, and marry who her lord wills.

[Tai Pan]

13 hours ago, dbergkvist said:

Arya is a serial killer, and will have killed even more people by the time she's old enough to marry. She is not a good match for anyone.

And I would agree but for the small chance Gendry can learn to make valyrian metal.  She's the girl most closely linked to romance with Gendry.  He may need to stab her in the chest to create his wonder weapon.