Unintentional humor

[Alyn Oakenfist]

So what instances are there of (probably) unintentional humor on GRRM's part. The ones I can think of are:

- Fat Pink Mast, obviously

- There's this little gem from Kevan's epilogue: "Kevan had a very strong suspicion on who this Ser Robert really was". Almost as Strong as Rhaenyra's boys

- And this little treasure from Stannis when talking to Jon Snow "Yes, I should have come sooner. If not for my Hand, I might not have come at all" ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

So what other do you know?

[Canon Claude]

3 hours ago, Alyn Oakenfist said:

So what instances are there of (probably) unintentional humor on GRRM's part. The ones I can think of are:

- Fat Pink Mast, obviously

- There's this little gem from Kevan's epilogue: "Kevan had a very strong suspicion on who this Ser Robert really was"

- And this little treasure from Stannis when talking to Jon Snow "Yes, I should have come sooner. If not for my Hand, I might not have come at all"

So what other do you know?

I’d go with the scene in ASOS when Loras furiously confronts Brienne and threatens to kill her for murdering Renly. I know it’s not supposed to be a funny scene, but when Brienne protests that she would have died for Renly, and Loras says “You will” as he draws his sword, I can’t help but laugh every time I read it. Even when he’s grieving and avenging the love of his life, Loras still manages to be melodramatic and witty, almost by accident.

[Alyn Oakenfist]

14 minutes ago, Canon Claude said:

I’d go with the scene in ASOS when Loras furiously confronts Brienne and threatens to kill her for murdering Renly. I know it’s not supposed to be a funny scene, but when Brienne protests that she would have died for Renly, and Loras says “You will” as he draws his sword, I can’t help but laugh every time I read it. Even when he’s grieving and avenging the love of his life, Loras still manages to be melodramatic and witty, almost by accident.

Robb's plans of taking Moat Cailin is also filled with a lot of weird wording that makes that part hilarious. Slightly overshadowed by what happens immediately afterwards.

[CamiloRP]

4 hours ago, Alyn Oakenfist said:

- Fat Pink Mast, obviously

I don't think this one is unintentional. It's dumb and ridiculous because that's who Sam is, particularly regarding sex.

[Alyn Oakenfist]

2 minutes ago, CamiloRP said:

I don't think this one is unintentional. It's dumb and ridiculous because that's who Sam is, particularly regarding sex.

Nah it's because that's who GRRM is. You can see it from Fat Pink Mat to Arianne's, gigantic, enormous, gravity bending nipples

[Eltharion21]

Yep Stannis / Davos  "bro"mance had some moments that made me chuckle too, and some descriptions are truly funny.

"I am your man, Your Grace. So it is your tongue, to do with as you please."

Hard was the word men used when they spoke of Stannis, and hard he was.

[LynnS]

Victarion wearing a squid helm cracks me up.  It's a ridiculous look that he takes so seriously.  I can't take anyone with calamari on their head seriously.

[TheLastWolf]

Yet he could scarcely tell Lord Mormont that it was another man's sword he dreamt of

Rickon needs to stop acting like a child, he’ll be 4 soon

But if we can attack from the north and west simultaneously, and take the ironmen in the rear while they are beating off what they think is my main thrust up the causeway, then we have a chance

7 hours ago, Alyn Oakenfist said:

Yes, I should have come sooner. If not for my Hand, I might not have come at all" ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

Fav

Could it be that Lord Renly, who looked so like a young Robert, had conceived a passion for a girl he fancied a young Lyanna? That struck him as more than passing queer

Passing queer!? Ned... Smh

Lol

[TheLastWolf]

You are the blood of the dragon, you can make a hat

 

Again the age thing. Rickon and Bran expectations at 4 and 7!?

Beric Dondarrion was handsome enough, but he was awfully old, almost twenty-two

 

ANYTHING VICTARION AND TOMMEN SAY

 

MYRish Swamp (mayir means hair in some Indian language. The most ancient one ig. Tamil) 

Fat pink Mast too

 

The Bruh moment. Jon and Aemon 

Jon . . . it grieves me to say, but Lord Commander Mormont was murdered at Craster's Keep, at the hands of his Sworn Brothers."

"Bro . . . our own men?" Aemon's words hurt a hundred times worse than his fingers . 

[Jay21]

4 hours ago, LynnS said:

Victarion wearing a squid helm cracks me up.  It's a ridiculous look that he takes so seriously.  I can't take anyone with calamari on their head seriously.

A lot of the descriptions of head gear seem a little unrealistic to me - I originally thought (and maybe still suspect a bit) that it was one of the places where Westerosi magic is still done so that a guy with 3' antlers sticking out of his head can still move and maneuver without being off balance and sore from the small of his back on up. 

back to Vic though, the internet is rank with artists on imgur/ pinterest and the like who have drawn Vic in his armour based upon the descriptions in the books.  Some of them make that calamari look downright scary and intimidating, but it's the kind of think a person could take in either direction.

[Jay21]

The horrible atrocities Victarion casually unleashes on the way to Slavers Bay always make me chuckle a bit.  Victarion's POV's are almost as fun as Cersei's. Too bad Victarion was never on Tywin's list of potential Cersei suitors.  Of course she would have hated him and he would have done mostly unspeakable things to her, but despite that, I'm sure they would have found a few moments of humour together.

[Alyn Oakenfist]

5 hours ago, TheLastWolf said:

Yet he could scarcely tell Lord Mormont that it was another man's sword he dreamt of

Isn't there something about gripping and feeling his sword in that very same paragraph?

5 hours ago, TheLastWolf said:

But if we can attack from the north and west simultaneously, and take the ironmen in the rear while they are beating off what they think is my main thrust up the causeway, then we have a chance

You forgot to highlight the beating off part. It's 3 different innuendos in one sentence.

 

[Hugorfonics]

12 hours ago, Alyn Oakenfist said:

- And this little treasure from Stannis when talking to Jon Snow "Yes, I should have come sooner. If not for my Hand, I might not have come at all" ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

I actually do find that line, like the whole exchange, hysterical.

Ill explain. So, Stannis is a firm believer in his Jesus like destiny

- "Your Grace asked for honest counsel. In honesty then . . . we lack the strength for another battle against the Lannisters."

"It is the great battle His Grace is speaking of," said a woman's voice, rich with the accents of the east.

-

But when Davos gets the top secret letter only to be viewed by guys learning to read, or the 5 kings of westeros, whatever. He pockets it to use as bartering for his treasonous neck because the smuggler naturally loves going back to his elementary basics

 

-This is from the Night's Watch. Maester, has King Stannis seen this letter?"

"I brought it to Lord Alester when it first arrived. He was the Hand then. I believed he discussed it with the queen. When I asked him if he wished to send a reply, he told me not to be a fool.

-

So when Jon brazenly, and gangster like says, 

-You came because we sent for you, I hope. Though I could not say why you took so long about it."

Surprisingly, Stannis smiled at that. "You're bold enough to be a Stark. Yes, I should have come sooner. If not for my Hand, I might not have come at all.

-

In actuality Stannis took so long precisely because of his Hand, I mean sure he came because Davos handed him the letter but thats what Hands do, hand stuff

-"How do you come to have them? They should have come to me."

"What else is a Hand for, if not to hand you things?" Tyrion handed her the letter.

[TheLastWolf]

10 hours ago, Alyn Oakenfist said:

Isn't there something about gripping and feeling his sword in that very same paragraph?

Maybe using a whetstone too 

10 hours ago, Alyn Oakenfist said:

You forgot to highlight the beating off part. It's 3 different innuendos in one sentence.

Thanks mate 

[Rose of Red Lake]

"Gatehouse Ami, gods be good. I couldn't believe that Lancel picked that one. What's wrong with that boy?"

"He's grown pious," said Jaime, "but it wasn't him who did the picking. Lady Amerei's mother is a Darry. Our uncle thought she'd help Lancel win the Darry smallfolk."

"How, by fucking them? 

 

[The Sleeper]

On 12/14/2020 at 3:29 PM, LynnS said:

Victarion wearing a squid helm cracks me up.  It's a ridiculous look that he takes so seriously.  I can't take anyone with calamari on their head seriously.

Some think of cephalopods as harbingers of existential horror, others as fine snacks to be enjoyed with alcoholic beverages on sunny days. 

 

3 hours ago, Rose of Red Lake said:

"Gatehouse Ami, gods be good. I couldn't believe that Lancel picked that one. What's wrong with that boy?"

"He's grown pious," said Jaime, "but it wasn't him who did the picking. Lady Amerei's mother is a Darry. Our uncle thought she'd help Lancel win the Darry smallfolk."

"How, by fucking them? 

 

That is intentional and most of what comes out of Daven Lannister's mouth is pure gold. It will be sad to see him go. 

[Wizz-The-Smith]

Quote

'Satin pissed himself when the horns blew, but Jon pretended not to notice. "Go shake Dick by the shoulder," he told the Oldtown boy.......

I'm sure Satin knows how to dry off Jon, and a rather elaborate technique I must say.