Today is a Lousy Day

[Fragile Bird]

We have a Today is a Good Day thread, I figure this side needs a thread, for rants.

I have good friends who live around the corner. A few weeks ago they stopped in front of my house and called me to come out so we could have a chat, in a neighborly fashion, but with masks and 2 meters apart. I admired their very nice masks and asked them to order me a couple from the lady who made them. 
 

My friend is a retired nurse who got into management and ended up as a senior hospital executive. She’s a great friend to have when in need, and in fact has a standing offer that I can stay in her spare bedroom if I ever need help, since I live alone. Her husband got laid off a decade ago and never found another job, he rolled into house husband because my friend had a high powered job. He volunteers for lots of stuff, has been in scouting for 30 years, and can do almost anything you could want done in a house, a natural and skilled handyman and furniture maker and whiz on computers.

Anyway, she called the other day to say she had a mask for me and would come by to drop it off. She got the AZ vaccine a few weeks ago and was sick as a dog. When she showed up I asked her how her husband dealt with his AZ shot, which I knew he was booked for. Oh, just fine, he got Pfizer at a hospital. And how did that happen, I asked (I assumed the answer was he switched after I got mine, when they dropped the age, but at a hospital?) Instead she told me to sit down. He got the shot in preparation for the chemo he’s going to start at the end of the month.

Just days after they saw me weeks ago, his wife thought there was a funny bump on his neck. Many tests later, he’s been diagnosed with a lymphoma, non-operable because it has wrapped around an artery in his neck. He’ll get chemo and radiation. At least, she said, if you’re going to get a non-Hodgkin’s lymphoma, it’s a good one to get. It’s indolent (slow growing) follicular. Highly treatable. He’s being seen by a world-leading specialist. And we have universal health care. 
 

About 25 years ago his youngest brother also had a lymphoma, but his was late stage. He was cured, but it was touch and go for a while.

My friend finally told me the news because they hadn’t told their four kids yet. Lots of tests had to be done. They did a zoom call Monday night to tell the kids and their partners. I was told before her siblings have been told, they are next on the list.

I feel better after reading some of the health pages about the disease. It had still hit me hard. We’re almost the same age. The age when we are getting cancer or weird diseases, or need cataract surgery or find out we have osteoporosis or other crap. The Golden Years, in other words.

Feel free to rant about your lousy day.

[Zorral]

It's hard, receiving news of this sort about people we care about and know well.  How best to be supportive of the diagnosed person, and best supportive of their immediate support -- and sometimes what is needed is diametrically opposite.  Often it's hard to figure out too, because like so many, our friends may not know themselves, or just can't speak of such things.

But your friends don't sound like that, which, oddly can be comforting, because you know they are going to allow you to be and want you to be supportive.  Or -- something like that.  It's complicated.

[maarsen]

13 hours ago, Fragile Bird said:

We have a Today is a Good Day thread, I figure this side needs a thread, for rants.

I have good friends who live around the corner. A few weeks ago they stopped in front of my house and called me to come out so we could have a chat, in a neighborly fashion, but with masks and 2 meters apart. I admired their very nice masks and asked them to order me a couple from the lady who made them. 
 

My friend is a retired nurse who got into management and ended up as a senior hospital executive. She’s a great friend to have when in need, and in fact has a standing offer that I can stay in her spare bedroom if I ever need help, since I live alone. Her husband got laid off a decade ago and never found another job, he rolled into house husband because my friend had a high powered job. He volunteers for lots of stuff, has been in scouting for 30 years, and can do almost anything you could want done in a house, a natural and skilled handyman and furniture maker and whiz on computers.

Anyway, she called the other day to say she had a mask for me and would come by to drop it off. She got the AZ vaccine a few weeks ago and was sick as a dog. When she showed up I asked her how her husband dealt with his AZ shot, which I knew he was booked for. Oh, just fine, he got Pfizer at a hospital. And how did that happen, I asked (I assumed the answer was he switched after I got mine, when they dropped the age, but at a hospital?) Instead she told me to sit down. He got the shot in preparation for the chemo he’s going to start at the end of the month.

Just days after they saw me weeks ago, his wife thought there was a funny bump on his neck. Many tests later, he’s been diagnosed with a lymphoma, non-operable because it has wrapped around an artery in his neck. He’ll get chemo and radiation. At least, she said, if you’re going to get a non-Hodgkin’s lymphoma, it’s a good one to get. It’s indolent (slow growing) follicular. Highly treatable. He’s being seen by a world-leading specialist. And we have universal health care. 
 

About 25 years ago his youngest brother also had a lymphoma, but his was late stage. He was cured, but it was touch and go for a while.

My friend finally told me the news because they hadn’t told their four kids yet. Lots of tests had to be done. They did a zoom call Monday night to tell the kids and their partners. I was told before her siblings have been told, they are next on the list.

I feel better after reading some of the health pages about the disease. It had still hit me hard. We’re almost the same age. The age when we are getting cancer or weird diseases, or need cataract surgery or find out we have osteoporosis or other crap. The Golden Years, in other words.

Feel free to rant about your lousy day.

Im a hoping all goes well for all. 

[Deedles]

I love my children. They are 2 and 6. They are funny, and kind, and interesting and BLOODY IMPOSSIBLE to work with effectively. Te first two COVID cases got diagnosed in their Creche which means 2 weeks (assuming they are negative ) of them being home while I try to work. And it’s awful. It just is. Between requests for nappy changes, or fighting, or requests fr treats as they know I’ll say yes to shut them up. Argh. 

[BigFatCoward]

Anybody who is working from home with young children is allowed to let them watch TV all day and give them all the crap treats they ask for. 

[IheartIheartTesla]

13 hours ago, Deedles said:

I love my children. They are 2 and 6. They are funny, and kind, and interesting and BLOODY IMPOSSIBLE to work with effectively. Te first two COVID cases got diagnosed in their Creche which means 2 weeks (assuming they are negative ) of them being home while I try to work. And it’s awful. It just is. Between requests for nappy changes, or fighting, or requests fr treats as they know I’ll say yes to shut them up. Argh. 

Get the 6 year old a kids tablet (like a Kindle Fire) where you can set parental controls and also control the apps they can use; and you might get some relief from him/her. There are some great educational apps out there that can also be not just distracting, but also useful.

[Deedles]

13 hours ago, BigFatCoward said:

Anybody who is working from home with young children is allowed to let them watch TV all day and give them all the crap treats they ask for. 

Oh I’m like a zoo keeper at the penguin enclosure at feeding time, instead of fish it’s haribo and rice cakes.

 

7 hours ago, IheartIheartTesla said:

Get the 6 year old a kids tablet (like a Kindle Fire) where you can set parental controls and also control the apps they can use; and you might get some relief from him/her. There are some great educational apps out there that can also be not just distracting, but also useful.

the problem is she runs interference with the 2 year old. He’s much happier doing whatever she does. And tbf, she is very good. Also, she thinks Khan kids is a video game. He is a terror though.

[Rippounet]

Had the worst row with my father-in-law today. The old man started spouting the most sterotypical racist bullshit you can imagine for about half-an-hour (he's been reading and listening to bad right-wing stuff - a guy called Zemmour). I tried to be cool and patient at first (not the first time this happens), but I lost my shit shortly around the time he accused the missus and I of having already "submitted" to Islam (this was a reference to Houellebecq's novel Submission). Nearly kicked him out of the house, but he was leaving anyway. Managed to say goodbye and let's not ever talk about this ever again.
The missus is heartbroken. Her father has been increasingly right-wing in the past years, but now he's moved on to serious far-right territory. I've never let him get away with the bullshit he spouts, and neither has my brother-in-law (who told him he was turning into a nazi), but things have escalated beyond any possibility of rational discussion. Everyone agrees we should never talk about politics again, but I'm not sure how easy that'll be... The man just loves coming back to these topics: he's old, lonely, and desperate for intellectual validation, so he just won't stop, and I'm not the patient type. In fact, I'm not sure I can truly forgive him for spouting such vile ethno-nationalist bullshit in front of me - I'm half-Jewish after all.
It's the kind of situation I've seen in fiction, without truly believing I'd ever live it. Beyond the family stuff, it says a lot about the political atmosphere in France today, and it's terrifying. Not a day goes by that I don't read an article discussing far-right ideas now. Macron and his gang are desperate to cling to power so they're playing with fire, and the media obediently helps them. This will not end well.

[Zorral]

51 minutes ago, Rippounet said:

Everyone agrees we should never talk about politics again, but I'm not sure how easy that'll be... The man just loves coming back to these topics:

This describes so many of my older male relatives over my lifetime, including my mother's husband (not my father).  Determined to fight about this until you admit they are right and you are wrong, while mostly -- at least in easier times, one felt most of this was because they just loved the sound of their own voices laying down the law, so to speak.  But the older they got the less could they tolerate at all any dissent -- and certainly never any other voices.  "I am Speaking, boy, you STFU, sit down and LISTEN to ME."

They got such delight from this, whereas everyone else got clenched stomachs -- at best.

So sorry you're going through this with your wife's father.

 

[RhaenysBee]

So my mother had a minor roof renovation done - essentially the objective was to put up new side pieces to prevent water damage. She received and accepted a quote of roughly 2k euros for the job the builders promised to complete in one day. 

As they started working on taking down the old wooden planks to replace them, they noticed that due to water damage, some of the wooden pieces holding the roof tiles are disintegrating (and thus they cannot attach the new side pieces to them). So they said they’d replace these, which would cost raw materials plus €20ish / square meter for the labor. They had to do this in two or three smaller areas. 

The work has been going on for 5 consecutive days, the garden is a pigsty of construction debris and my mother found dozens of liquor and beer bottles in the trash bags they leave behind. They smoke on the terrace and leave their lunch on the terrace table. They never once arrived at the time they said they would and showed up hours later at their own comfort. They asked my mother to put their lunch in her fridge and borrow her bicycle to go to the grocery store (to buy liquor, as it turns out). She refused these requests. 

The work is still not done and they asked to be paid ~5k euros (raw material invoices or any calculation indicating the reason for 250% of the original quote is nowhere in sight): My mother said no way, so they went down to ~4k. They asked to be paid today because the work is “almost done”. My mother said no way. They asked to paid 3k and see the rest when the work is done. My mother said no way. So now they are supposed to come back tomorrow and potentially finally finish the work and maybe perhaps if they feel like and have the time and it’s not raining, pick up the debris and trash after themselves and leave a semi-clean yard and an ugly but at least completed and hopefully functional job. 

Welcome to Eastern Europe. 

[Derfel Cadarn]

1 minute ago, RhaenysBee said:

So my mother had a minor roof renovation done - essentially the objective was to put up new side pieces to prevent water damage. She received and accepted a quote of roughly 2k euros for the job the builders promised to complete in one day. 

As they started working on taking down the old wooden planks to replace them, they noticed that due to water damage, some of the wooden pieces holding the roof tiles are disintegrating (and thus they cannot attach the new side pieces to them). So they said they’d replace these, which would cost raw materials plus €20ish / square meter for the labor. They had to do this in two or three smaller areas. 

The work has been going on for 5 consecutive days, the garden is a pigsty of construction debris and my mother found dozens of liquor and beer bottles in the trash bags they leave behind. They smoke on the terrace and leave their lunch on the terrace table. They never once arrived at the time they said they would and showed up hours later at their own comfort. They asked my mother to put their lunch in her fridge and borrow her bicycle to go to the grocery store (to buy liquor, as it turns out). She refused these requests. 

The work is still not done and they asked to be paid ~5k euros (raw material invoices or any calculation indicating the reason for 250% of the original quote is nowhere in sight): My mother said no way, so they went down to ~4k. They asked to be paid today because the work is “almost done”. My mother said no way. They asked to paid 3k and see the rest when the work is done. My mother said no way. So now they are supposed to come back tomorrow and potentially finally finish the work and maybe perhaps if they feel like and have the time and it’s not raining, pick up the debris and trash after themselves and leave a semi-clean yard and an ugly but at least completed and hopefully functional job. 

Welcome to Eastern Europe. 

Ouch. Had my own issue with cowboy roofers in the UK.

[Zorral]

Those people are in that line of business in every country in the world.

[A True Kaniggit]

Not so much a lousy day. But irritating. 
 

Some jerk crashed into my mailbox and then took off. Completely ruined it and the post.

Always something right?

[Spockydog]

On 4/29/2021 at 6:11 PM, Derfel Cadarn said:

Ouch. Had my own issue with cowboy roofers in the UK.

#VoteBinface

[Cas Stark]

On 4/29/2021 at 1:09 PM, RhaenysBee said:

So my mother had a minor roof renovation done - essentially the objective was to put up new side pieces to prevent water damage. She received and accepted a quote of roughly 2k euros for the job the builders promised to complete in one day. 

As they started working on taking down the old wooden planks to replace them, they noticed that due to water damage, some of the wooden pieces holding the roof tiles are disintegrating (and thus they cannot attach the new side pieces to them). So they said they’d replace these, which would cost raw materials plus €20ish / square meter for the labor. They had to do this in two or three smaller areas. 

The work has been going on for 5 consecutive days, the garden is a pigsty of construction debris and my mother found dozens of liquor and beer bottles in the trash bags they leave behind. They smoke on the terrace and leave their lunch on the terrace table. They never once arrived at the time they said they would and showed up hours later at their own comfort. They asked my mother to put their lunch in her fridge and borrow her bicycle to go to the grocery store (to buy liquor, as it turns out). She refused these requests. 

The work is still not done and they asked to be paid ~5k euros (raw material invoices or any calculation indicating the reason for 250% of the original quote is nowhere in sight): My mother said no way, so they went down to ~4k. They asked to be paid today because the work is “almost done”. My mother said no way. They asked to paid 3k and see the rest when the work is done. My mother said no way. So now they are supposed to come back tomorrow and potentially finally finish the work and maybe perhaps if they feel like and have the time and it’s not raining, pick up the debris and trash after themselves and leave a semi-clean yard and an ugly but at least completed and hopefully functional job. 

Welcome to Eastern Europe. 

Sounds just like the U.S. to be honest.  Finding a good contractor/repair person is almost like hitting the lottery.  

[ThinkerX]

got hit with a unwarranted pay cut at work, set up in such a way I can't fight it.  Meh.

About to go torque my back and other appendages changing out the tires on the one vehicle.  Dropped two grand plus into said vehicle a few weeks ago because it needed new brakes - not just the shoes, which is routine, but rotors, calipers, and the actual brake lines - plus the rear brakes needed work.  Ouch.  The joys of a twenty year old vehicle.

 

[RhaenysBee]

8 hours ago, Cas Stark said:

Sounds just like the U.S. to be honest.  Finding a good contractor/repair person is almost like hitting the lottery.  

This is a bit comforting, oddly. Although I am sorry the entire world has to deal with this shit :/ 

 

[DireWolfSpirit]

The weekends are too damn short!!!!!

[aceluby]

My in-laws were supposed to leave yesterday afternoon and they are all still fucking here.

[BigFatCoward]

3 hours ago, DireWolfSpirit said:

The weekends are too damn short!!!!!

Even 3 day weekends are too short.