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What are your thoughts on any type of "relationship advice" subs or forums?


Mysecondaccount
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You know the subreddits and forums, where users go for advice on any type of relationship (usually on partners, parents/siblings, siblings, etc.) problems? What are your personal thoughts and experiences on/with those types of forums, if any? Are they useful for assistance or should one avoid touching them?

I'm not going in depth with my personal views on them, as it got derided as "babbling gobbledygook drivel" last time I did that. However, I don't really care for them much, and as they come across as quite toxic to me.

Edited by Mysecondaccount
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I think it takes a special level of arrogance to decide that people shouldn't respond to requests for advice that have been made because a person clearly thinks advice, even from strangers, might be useful, and can then take or leave that advice as they see fit. If they ain't for you they ain't for you, I don't use them and don't think I ever would, and everything should be taken with caution and the perspective that their situation will never be your exact situation, but telling people they should never use them at all is a bit... far, especially with the aggression of your tone.

 

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36 minutes ago, polishgenius said:

I think it takes a special level of arrogance to decide that people shouldn't respond to requests for advice that have been made because a person clearly thinks advice, even from strangers, might be useful, and can then take or leave that advice as they see fit. If they ain't for you they ain't for you, I don't use them and don't think I ever would, and everything should be taken with caution and the perspective that their situation will never be your exact situation, but telling people they should never use them at all is a bit... far, especially with the aggression of your tone.

 

Dude, please dial it back a bit. I never said they shouldn't be used at all (that is you grossly misquoting what is me trying to ask the equivalent of "do you think [x random film] a good movie, or is it one I should pass"), though I personally don't really care for them.

Edited by Mysecondaccount
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3 minutes ago, Mysecondaccount said:

I never said they shouldn't be used at all

 

1 hour ago, Mysecondaccount said:

However, I think it takes a special level of arrogance to feel like you can make judgments on the lives of complete strangers.


Well no, you just said that using them, or at least being a person who gives advice on them making them exist at all, is the sign of a serious negative personal trait.
 

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8 minutes ago, polishgenius said:

 


Well no, you just said that using them, or at least being a person who gives advice on them making them exist at all, is the sign of a serious negative personal trait.
 

That is me simply having a negative opinion of those types of commenters, nothing more and nothing less. If people want take advise from those users, then I wish them luck. Sorry for coming across as pushing my personal opinions on them.

Edited by Mysecondaccount
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Just now, Mysecondaccount said:

That is me simply having a negative opinion of those types of commenters. If people want take advise from those users, then I wish them the best in life.

And this is us having a negative opinion of you. :dunno:

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11 minutes ago, sologdin said:

is this an advice thread about advice threads?

It's a thread about shoelaces.

For sneakers/ tennis shoes, the rule is the laces should be tucked into both sides of the shoe, so that the laces do not flop about and present a tripping hazard.

For dress shoes, the laces should be presented in a perfectly symmetrical  "Shoe lace knot".

I think there is a song about it. Something about bunny ears. Or ducking down the rabbit.

Edited by A True Kaniggit
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I find the dating thread here to be quite compelling. It’s helpful that most of us know each other in real life, in some cases for over 20 years, so our advice is often extra awesome and not generic.

Edited by Chataya de Fleury
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To answer the OP -- it really depends. I don't go into random relationship advice forums that cater to cishet folks, because there are enough reasonably astute people out there already serving that community. The only times I've ever offered advice to people I don't know personally, it's been for someone with whom I share specific life experience (transgender, non-binary, queer, chronic illness/disability) and especially when they're trying to navigate a situation that is new to them. 

When it comes to relationship advice, I agree with @Liffguard -- 99% of the time, people actually know what they want or need to do, they just need some external validation or reinforcement.

Edit: With friends or people I know at least casually (e.g. folks on the forum) I am usually more ready to offer my thoughts or advice, but that's because many of us have known each other for like 20 years.

Edited by Xray the Enforcer
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19 minutes ago, Chataya de Fleury said:

I find the dating thread here to be quite compelling. It’s helpful that most of us know each other in real life, in some cases for over 20 years, so our advice is often extra awesome and not generic.

Yeah, one advantage with this over something like Reddit, is that you actually have an established connection those people. Too often, users on those anonymous subs and forums are dealing what is to them a faceless screen, and often forget that there's a person behind them. Although it obviously isn't always that way, I've come across quite a bit of vitriol spewed about in those threads.

 

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