Dating thread - NEVER EVER GETTING BACK TOGETHER edition

[mormont]

Thanks for the nice words, folks. I'm not really seriously looking, to be honest, just seeing what's out there, so to speak.

5 hours ago, DMC said:

To be fair, while I've never used a dating app, I'd have a hard time filling out the hobbies section too.  Let's see I..follow some sports teams.  I watch certain movies and tv shows, read certain books.  Other than that I..drink and get high.  Doesn't sound very appealing -- which is probably why I should continue not using dating apps.

Bumble allows you to select five 'interests' from a defined list, which weirdly subdivides into not only things like sports, music and films that you like but also 'values and traits' which is even more weirdly separate from 'values and allyship'. So you can have 'reading fantasy' but to fit that in you might have to drop 'trans ally'. I had a lot of trouble getting it down to the five most relevant things but some people seem to have had trouble finding five and went for some really bland options.

'Values' include things like 'being open-minded' which is either meaningless or code for kink, I'm not sure yet, but if it's the latter just say so.

[BigFatCoward]

50 minutes ago, mormont said:

Thanks for the nice words, folks. I'm not really seriously looking, to be honest, just seeing what's out there, so to speak.

 

I'd imagine there is a strong correlation with this mindset and actual success. 

Make sure in interests you list 'wielding unbelievable power on an fantasy message board'. 

Edited January 25, 2022 by BigFatCoward

[kiko]

1 hour ago, BigFatCoward said:

Make sure in interests you list 'wielding unbelievable power on an fantasy message board'. 

"If you are openminded enough to be moderated by me, I will make every warning point count."

[Fury Resurrected]

On 1/24/2022 at 4:04 PM, mormont said:

I, on the other hand, just created a Bumble account! Which has served to remind me of three things:

1. I have astonishingly few pictures of myself. Really, it's a problem. I took a few selfies but I'm not practiced at it.

2. Many people are really bad at selling themselves. Like, don't select a profile pic that's you and your bestie, I can't tell which one is you. And don't tell me you're looking for someone 'honest' or 'genuine' because that's what everyone is looking for, and it doesn't deter liars and fakes even a little bit. And surely you can come up with a more interesting hobby than 'city breaks'?

3. I am very picky these days and I'm OK with that.

I didn’t like Bumble because I saw literally zero people I found attractive on it and didn’t like that I’d have to send the first message for sure if I did. I understand how dumb those openings are. What are you supposed to say, Hi, I like your face!

 

Needless to say, I haven’t started dating but I’m pretty good at shutting people down

[Fragile Bird]

23 hours ago, Chataya de Fleury said:

1. You’re a hottie; you’ll be fine.

I also have very few pics of myself, but I have A TON of cat pics. My cats could slay a dating app for sure. “Desperately Seeking Tabby” - it could be A Thing. With Madonna songs.
 

2. wtf is a “city break”??? And I confess, this time around, I was like, “profile, schmofile, I know what they want from me. Sadly.” So, I was a bit generic. My hobbies are “reading and watching Netflix when I get a minute” which is the sad truth.

 

3. Amen. Mr. Risk 2.0 was keen on Date 2, he and even (earlier today) proposed Date 2 for this evening, but I could not possibly be free until Wednesday, which led to a schedule conflict with Mr. War Correspondent, FML. I must resolve this issue.

 

47th birthday tomorrow. 

Happy Birthday, Chats!  

[mcbigski]

On 1/24/2022 at 12:21 PM, Chataya de Fleury said:

Reporting back on the 6 pm date -

I don’t know what it is with me and Risk Managers, but he is Mr. Risk Manager 2. 
He’s 40, indeed 6’1” (which doesn’t really matter, but he’s not lying about his height, which is always sad when someone who claims to be 5’11” is visibly shorter than me and I’m 5’6”). Super cute. Great conversationalist. We ended up making out in his car 

And second date on Wednesday.

6 feet is one of those inflection points.  I've only met women who claim to be 5' 11".  My sister is under six foot, but except for basketball bios, never over.  (She's closer to 6 even than an inch either way, though now that she's over 50, maybe take the under!)  Likewise, if a guy is claiming 5' 11" but not 6'0", you should do your due dilligence. 

If he's actually 5'11" thats probably an honesty unicorn, so be careful what you ask him.

 

[Tywin et al.]

3 minutes ago, mcbigski said:

6 feet is one of those inflection points.  I've only met women who claim to be 5' 11".  My sister is under six foot, but except for basketball bios, never over.  (She's closer to 6 even than an inch either way, though now that she's over 50, maybe take the under!)  Likewise, if a guy is claiming 5' 11" but not 6'0", you should do your due dilligence. 

If he's actually 5'11" thats probably an honesty unicorn, so be careful what you ask him.

 

Lol, senior year of HS I dated a volleyball player who was adamant she was 5'11. Likewise my step-brother swore he was 6' on the dot. She was probably three inches taller than him.

[kiko]

6 hours ago, Fury Resurrected said:

I didn’t like Bumble because I saw literally zero people I found attractive on it and didn’t like that I’d have to send the first message for sure if I did. I understand how dumb those openings are. What are you supposed to say, Hi, I like your face!

 

Needless to say, I haven’t started dating but I’m pretty good at shutting people down

I never have used a dating app, but I how else would you get in contact if not by writing someone a message?

[Larry of the Lake]

34 minutes ago, kiko said:

I never have used a dating app, but I how else would you get in contact if not by writing someone a message?

Most apps allow either person to send a message if you match.  Bumble's whole shctick is that the woman has to send the first message, and that they only have 24 hours to do this or the match "expires" and you can't talk.  And if you don't respond to that message within 24 hours it also 'expires'.

 

Edited January 26, 2022 by Larry of the Lake

[maarsen]

8 hours ago, mcbigski said:

6 feet is one of those inflection points.  I've only met women who claim to be 5' 11".  My sister is under six foot, but except for basketball bios, never over.  (She's closer to 6 even than an inch either way, though now that she's over 50, maybe take the under!)  Likewise, if a guy is claiming 5' 11" but not 6'0", you should do your due dilligence. 

If he's actually 5'11" thats probably an honesty unicorn, so be careful what you ask him.

 

I have no desire or interest besides entertainment in dating apps. However as someone who actually is 5'11" and never have claimed to be 6', I suppose I should be grateful I am not on any dating app.

[Chataya de Fleury]

Sooooooo….I was “Bad Decision Chataya” after three sour apple martinis last night. Ye Ex (actually both exes, W and Firm) texted me “Happy Birthday” last night. I deleted W’s text. BUT, I was kind of hoping (in my very drunken state that Firm would want to get back together.

Apparently, he has decided to work on his anger management issues, and he has also spent the past two weeks binging Netflix with his cats and realizing that he was stoopid to break up with me.

So, I got very pleasantly tied up and much fun was had. And this morning, I was, ahem, very late for work.

So, we are officially back together. My son and my hairdresser think that this is a Bad Idea. 

I have notified all my Match dot com potentials and had to cancel a date. I was encouraged by the very nice responses from my suitors. 

Edited January 26, 2022 by Chataya de Fleury

[Elder Sister]

1 hour ago, Chataya de Fleury said:

Sooooooo….I was “Bad Decision Chataya” after three sour apple martinis last night. Ye Ex (actually both exes, W and Firm) texted me “Happy Birthday” last night. I deleted W’s text. BUT, I was kind of hoping (in my very drunken state that Firm would want to get back together.

Apparently, he has decided to work on his anger management issues, and he has also spent the past two weeks binging Netflix with his cats and realizing that he was stoopid to break up with me.

So, I got very pleasantly tied up and much fun was had. And this morning, I was, ahem, very late for work.

So, we are officially back together. My son and my hairdresser think that this is a Bad Idea. 

I have notified all my Match dot com potentials and had to cancel a date. I was encouraged by the very nice responses from my suitors. 

I keep seeing the "I've made a huge mistake" memes from Arrested Development, Chats. 

Hey, people can change.  It happens.  I hope he's serious about anger management work...and maybe you can help him to be more open-minded.  

[Maithanet]

You do you Chats.  You have as much experience with dating as the rest of the thread combined, so who are we mere mortals to pass judgement? 

[mcbigski]

On 1/26/2022 at 7:56 AM, maarsen said:

I have no desire or interest besides entertainment in dating apps. However as someone who actually is 5'11" and never have claimed to be 6', I suppose I should be grateful I am not on any dating app.

Well you'd come accross as credible w...Um a side of you re taller than I thought.  So you have that going for you, which according to Bill Murray is nice.

On 1/26/2022 at 12:15 PM, Chataya de Fleury said:

Sooooooo….I was “Bad Decision Chataya” after three sour apple martinis last night. Ye Ex (actually both exes, W and Firm) texted me “Happy Birthday” last night. I deleted W’s text. BUT, I was kind of hoping (in my very drunken state that Firm would want to get back together.

...

So, we are officially back together. My son and my hairdresser think that this is a Bad Idea. 

Happy birthday.  If I'm up to speed firm decided to de escalate the political differences.  Obv you're both going to want each other to change some.  But doesn't have to be a deal breaker.

Though if he goes back to the money thing again, then hes probably a congenital bully.

[Tears of Lys]

When your son and your HAIRDRESSER (!!) call it a bad decision, that should say it all.  

Look, a good "F" is fun, and I'd be the last person to deny anyone that pleasure, but time's passing, Chats.  Do you really want to waste any more of it?  

Like they say about food - A moment on the lips, forever on the hips.  An orgasm is just as fleeting and the results can be just as devastating.