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F—-k cancer


Madame deVenoge
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  • 2 months later...

My best friend died yesterday of cancer. It was diagnosed in april.  It started in the ovaries and quickly spread to other organs. Even though the ovaries as well as the uterus were removed and chemotherapy it didn't work out. Last week she was admitted to the palliativ care unit of our local hospital. Last week her mood was still quite good and she made still plans for the future. On Monday she was informed that there were no more treatment options. On Tuesday, her general condition deteriorated rapidly. When she died her boyfriend and her father were with her.

She had been my best friend for twenty years. She always supported me - when my father died and when I had a stroke myself. She was also one of the most positive people I know. She was 53 years old.

Fuck cancer

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Have this situation with three dear friend-families going on right now too.

It's so difficult providing support without being a jerk in some way. But that difficulty is nothing to what the patients and their care providers are facing -- the multiple of what they are facing.  They are all so tired, patients and care givers.

 

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My wife has cancer as well. Just had her colon removed. Hopefully they got it and chemo can get the rest but this has been an exhausting two weeks here from going to the hospital to finding out it was cancer to getting it removed and now getting ready to go home and I guess wait for results and get ready for chemo if necessary. I was always the one with the nagging health issues so wasn’t expecting this at all. This all sucks and I hate that this is a “preventable” type cancer but they don’t usually do colonoscopy scanning for healthy 40 year olds.

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13 minutes ago, Arakasi said:

Hopefully they got it and chemo can get the rest but this has been an exhausting two weeks here from going to the hospital to finding out it was cancer to getting it removed and now getting ready to go home and I guess wait for results and get ready for chemo if necessary.

I am so sorry to see this.  One of our friends has been going through all this for the same reasons, beginning back this spring.  Your friends can be your great asset, giving you a space to be with someone/s who will give you a respite to talk and think about something else for a little while.  Our friend says this is the case for him, anyway.

All best wishes for the best outcome for you wife, you and your family.  Again, I'm so sorry to hear this.

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  • 2 months later...

PETscan for my wife today. Since the last have wrestled with metastasis to the brain, radiation, lots of IV hydration and a week in the hospital. The good news is that hospital MRI showed some improvement in the brain. 
 

Really hoping for good results tomorrow - she’s been through most of the treatment strategies. 

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19 hours ago, hauberk said:

PETscan for my wife today. Since the last have wrestled with metastasis to the brain, radiation, lots of IV hydration and a week in the hospital. The good news is that hospital MRI showed some improvement in the brain. 
 

Really hoping for good results tomorrow - she’s been through most of the treatment strategies. 

Please do keep us updated. Hoping for good results.

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1 hour ago, Chataya de Fleury said:

Please do keep us updated. Hoping for good results.

Some good, some unclear, some crossover with bad medical experiences thread:

 

lymph appears much improved, mostly resolved. 

bones appear much improved, mostly resolved

Brain shows reduction in all lesions some fully resolved

liver indeterminate. Imaging done and read at a different facility due to travel limitations. Did not look at all previous scans, including a week old CT for comparison. Did not provide same granularity of analysis - felt mailed in

blood work shows some elevation. 
 

more hurry up and wait. 

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16 minutes ago, hauberk said:

Some good, some unclear, some crossover with bad medical experiences thread:

 

lymph appears much improved, mostly resolved. 

bones appear much improved, mostly resolved

Brain shows reduction in all lesions some fully resolved

liver indeterminate. Imaging done and read at a different facility due to travel limitations. Did not look at all previous scans, including a week old CT for comparison. Did not provide same granularity of analysis - felt mailed in

blood work shows some elevation. 
 

more hurry up and wait. 

We felt at some points like we were playing Whac-a-Mole, especially when the disease moved to bones and liver. On the one hand, the highly-focused radiation could go really hard at identified lesions in those places, with high confidence of destroying all cells in the target area. (Three weeks of daily RT, 30-45 minutes lying on that hard radiation table was hell for my darling. Tough as nails she was, but she came out in the wheelchair with tears on her face.)

CT four weeks later showed the radiation had done its work ... but also two new dark places in pelvis & liver. And the enforced pauses between rad & chemo (washout) felt like opportunity lost. Looking back, I still can't reconcile real time vs. my experience of time during those two years.

Big hugs for you and your wife, Hauberk.

 

 

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  • 3 weeks later...
2 hours ago, Ran said:

So terribly sorry for your loss, @hauberk

Is there any research foundation or organization that helped your wife, or a charity she cared about that we could contribute to?

She struggled with metastatic breast cancer so that’s pretty much covered by breast cancer research. I, personally, have some issues with Komen after they pulled some funding from Planned Parenthood. 
 

Last year she was connected with Little Pink Houses of Hope, an organization that provides retreats for the families with a loved one going through breast cancer. It was a powerful experience for her that connected her with a group of women that fully understood her experience.  I distinctly remember sitting outside our accommodations and heard her with the group laughing more joyously than I had heard since her recurrence. That group was with her, supporting her by text message everyday since we returned. 

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