Corvo the Crow Posted March 12, 2023 Share Posted March 12, 2023 With rumors of Stannis' death Selyse is no longer a woman wed, and considering all the commotion caused by Patrek of the Empty Head (now literally, with his brain splattered around by Wun Wun) and attempt on the Chosen(in both senses of the word) Lord Commander's life, I think this is quite the oppurtunity for Tormund to try his chance with the mustached lady. What would happen as a result of this? I know Tormund would be somewhat disappointed with Selyse only having a wispy mustache(but he may yet find some solace in her magnificent chin hair, exceeding in amount the hair Val has between her legs), but what else? Would Selyse come to view wildlings in a better light? After all, she's sent/allowed Patrek to try steal Val so she's somewhat in acceptance of the wildling culture already, would this stealing help form better bonds between the two peoples? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jon Fossoway Posted March 12, 2023 Share Posted March 12, 2023 I legit think Selyse would kick his ass if he tried to steal her. The moustache queen is described as physically imposing: tall as her husband, who is over 1.90 mtrs or 6' 4'', a no bullshit personality and all. Besides, if I remember rightly, this "ceremony" of stealing a bride (or a groom) is supposed to be as careful as possible. The stealer don't want to kill the stolen. It's not the objective to fight. When Ryk stole Munda he endured all the damage she inflicted upon him to a point where Munda apparently accepted him. This may look as the Stocolm scenario but it feels more like a ceremony both knew to the bone. There had to be resistance, there had to be endurance. Anyways, Selyse has no idea of all this freefolk customs so my guess is that she would indiscriminately kick Tormund's ass to a bloody pulp. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Corvo the Crow Posted March 12, 2023 Author Share Posted March 12, 2023 1 hour ago, Jon Fossoway said: I legit think Selyse would kick his ass if he tried to steal her. The moustache queen is described as physically imposing: tall as her husband, who is over 1.90 mtrs or 6' 4'', a no bullshit personality and all. Besides, if I remember rightly, this "ceremony" of stealing a bride (or a groom) is supposed to be as careful as possible. The stealer don't want to kill the stolen. It's not the objective to fight. When Ryk stole Munda he endured all the damage she inflicted upon him to a point where Munda apparently accepted him. This may look as the Stocolm scenario but it feels more like a ceremony both knew to the bone. There had to be resistance, there had to be endurance. Anyways, Selyse has no idea of all this freefolk customs so my guess is that she would indiscriminately kick Tormund's ass to a bloody pulp. So you are suggesting that Selyse will steal Tormund instead? Points to the Mustache lady. Also she knows the custom now. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Maegor_the_Cool Posted March 12, 2023 Share Posted March 12, 2023 Don’t put that on my man Tormund. I’d rather he “steal” Maege Mormont Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Corvo the Crow Posted March 12, 2023 Author Share Posted March 12, 2023 1 hour ago, Lord_Tywin_Lannister said: Don’t put that on my man Tormund. I’d rather he “steal” Maege Mormont But he wants it himself. I think Selyse is the best mate Tormund can ever hope to get, she is tall and well built, has mustache and a personality to go with it! Not some softling but more wild than most wildlings. I think Stannis is really missing out a lot by not visiting her bed more often. Quote Queen Selyse’s protectors stood along the walls, shining knights all in a row: Ser Malegorn, Ser Benethon, Ser Narbert, Ser Patrek, Ser Dorden, Ser Brus. With so many bloodthirsty wildlings infesting Castle Black, Selyse kept her sworn shields about her night and day. Tormund Giantsbane had roared to hear it. “Afraid of being carried off, is she? I hope you never said how big me member is, Jon Snow, that’d frighten any woman. I always wanted me one with a mustache.” Then he laughed and laughed. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jon Fossoway Posted March 12, 2023 Share Posted March 12, 2023 4 hours ago, Corvo the Crow said: So you are suggesting that Selyse will steal Tormund instead? Points to the Mustache lady. Also she knows the custom now. She knows the customs and probably considers it 'savage'. Just as the freefolk know the concept of 'bending the knee' but can't seem to grasp how a feudal system works and why 'bending the knee' and establishing a hierarchy is an integral part of it. So concerning Tormund's ass kicked... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SeanF Posted March 12, 2023 Share Posted March 12, 2023 He’d be like Lord Flasheart. ”This one’s got a beard. Great. Gives me something to hang on to! Let’s doo it!” Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kissdbyfire Posted March 12, 2023 Share Posted March 12, 2023 5 hours ago, Lord_Tywin_Lannister said: Don’t put that on my man Tormund. I’d rather he “steal” Maege Mormont Maybe he has already! The woman had a terrible temper, and she put up quite the fight when I laid hands on her. It was all I could do to carry her home and get her out o' them furs, but when I did, oh, she was hotter even than I remembered, and we had a fine old time, and then I went to sleep. Next morning when I woke the snow had stopped and the sun was shining, but I was in no fit state to enjoy it. All ripped and torn I was, and half me member bit right off, and there on me floor was a she-bear's pelt. And soon enough the free folk were telling tales o' this bald bear seen in the woods, with the queerest pair o' cubs behind her. Har!" He slapped a meaty thigh. "Would that I could find her again. She was fine to lay with, that bear. Never was a woman gave me such a fight, nor such strong sons neither." —— A stab at me, Asha thought, but let it be. "You are wed." "No. My children were fathered by a bear." Alysane smiled. Her teeth were crooked, but there was something ingratiating about that smile. "Mormont women are skinchangers. We turn into bears and find mates in the woods. Everyone knows." Asha smiled back. "Mormont women are all fighters too." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Aejohn the Conqueroo Posted March 13, 2023 Share Posted March 13, 2023 He might never go back to bears. Walruses all over the Bay of Seals will be sleeping with one eye open. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
astarkchoice Posted March 14, 2023 Share Posted March 14, 2023 Suddenly the barren hairy lipped old with begins popping out kids like shes a pedigree dog whelping a litter. The night watch towers shake every night as tormund rocks her world, the others themselves hear selyse 'arrive' and turn back. Stannis pops out of the snow looks at tormund and gives him a nod and a smile...shes ur problem now buddy. Soon the reach is the florents again after tormond explains that he and selyse are very sexualy open thus the ginger stud is allowed to vist the queen of thorns for some one on one 'negotations' plus after an easy beatdown of renly and garlan ( at the same time) the tyrells back off and know their role..tormand is now lord of the reach!!! Dany decides to stay in essos as word reaches her that the ginger beast has threatened to 'rape her dragons to death' ....drogon flys on regardless and comes back in a hurry, stays in a cave and refuses to eat or come out for weeks! Dany having got the message backs the hell off Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Corvo the Crow Posted March 20, 2023 Author Share Posted March 20, 2023 On 3/14/2023 at 8:06 PM, astarkchoice said: Suddenly the barren hairy lipped old with begins popping out kids like shes a pedigree dog whelping a litter. The night watch towers shake every night as tormund rocks her world, the others themselves hear selyse 'arrive' and turn back. Stannis pops out of the snow looks at tormund and gives him a nod and a smile...shes ur problem now buddy. Soon the reach is the florents again after tormond explains that he and selyse are very sexualy open thus the ginger stud is allowed to vist the queen of thorns for some one on one 'negotations' plus after an easy beatdown of renly and garlan ( at the same time) the tyrells back off and know their role..tormand is now lord of the reach!!! Dany decides to stay in essos as word reaches her that the ginger beast has threatened to 'rape her dragons to death' ....drogon flys on regardless and comes back in a hurry, stays in a cave and refuses to eat or come out for weeks! Dany having got the message backs the hell off She's not barren, she has a kid. It's just that Stannis doesn't perform his duties as a husband in the marriage bed as often as he should be performing them. Dereliction of duty from Stannis. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
astarkchoice Posted March 20, 2023 Share Posted March 20, 2023 1 hour ago, Corvo the Crow said: She's not barren, she has a kid. It's just that Stannis doesn't perform his duties as a husband in the marriage bed as often as he should be performing them. Dereliction of duty from Stannis. Thats a hard friggin duty man id say hes given it the old college try Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Corvo the Crow Posted March 20, 2023 Author Share Posted March 20, 2023 19 minutes ago, astarkchoice said: Thats a hard friggin duty man id say hes given it the old college try Tormund appreciates her "beauty" and character. If he wants someone beautiful but cowed, Stannis should just take one of the daughters of Gerrick Kingsblood. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
astarkchoice Posted March 20, 2023 Share Posted March 20, 2023 14 minutes ago, Corvo the Crow said: Tormund appreciates her "beauty" and character. If he wants someone beautiful but cowed, Stannis should just take one of the daughters of Gerrick Kingsblood. Ooh tormund you rascal ...i hope that big crazy sob is given a lordship somehow by the books end! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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