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Myshkin

Roberts Newcomb and Stanek

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Oh, I am well aware of the horrors of Tairy. S*anek's weaknesses are more subtle. If you skimmed the quoted passage you might not even notice. But look again. Oddly continuous sentences. Immediate contradictions. Dangling modifiers. It is truly ugly.

But yes, Tairy will always remain the very pinnacle of horrible fantasy writing. Well, except he doesn't write fantasy -- I always forget that.

I agree with both your comments. I was sleepy and didn't read very carefully and expected outright shock, the way Tairy's passages rock my world. But, after all, Moose&co scoured Tairy's books to find the very best of his writing, while the passage you posted is just a random excerpt of S*anek's.

On Newcomb: there's a nice Newcomb hate site somewhere on the web. It has a long list of stupid cliches the creator of the site found in the 5th Sorceress.

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I have read The Fifth Sorceress - all the way through. Yes it is hard work but it is comedy gold :lol:

Terrible writing, really icky scenes, a plot with more holes than swiss cheese, and moments that are just so really, really bad - but its quite funny if you read it as a comedy fantasy novel.

Great scenes to look out for:

The scene where the first wizard (read Zedd from WFR) named Wigg tries to explain to the handsome hero why the war with the sorceresses began in the first place. They are evil because they read a book they should not have but they stole the book because they are evil bitches in the first place. It is a continuity loop that just boggles the mind.

Actually how could I forget the events which lead up to that where Wigg knows that a ceremony which makes the king no longer invulnerable to death is a trap and that the sorceresses will attack at exactly that moment and kill everyone - yet he still goes ahead with the ceremony.

The most icky scene of all when one of the sorceresses tricks our hero into being alone with her, then using magic to pin him down and proceeds to rape him and she says: "I am going to manipulate your seed with magic to ensure I become pregnant with our child and use my magic to ensure it is a male and he will rule the world [cue evil laugh]" those are not the exact words but that is the gist of it. :sick:

There is a gnome called Shannon who is ill tempered. No really. :o

And of course the classic comeback during the final confrontation where the hero tells the evil sorceress "there is a village somewhere missing its idiot". And this scathing criticism sends her into a flying rage which the hero uses her lack of focus to turn the tables on her and save the day.

:sick: :sick: :sick:

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Right. I've just signed up to Staneks message board! What should I expect?
The beast itself, lurking in its lair, preying on the innocent.

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:stunned: Jings!!!

Cruising about the forums,its full of posts in anticipation of Jordans new doorstop.

"I'm also quite interested in this one, but not as much as in "In The Service of Dragons" III & IV.

Still, I want to find out what happens to Rand & Co."

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This is a classic :thumbsup:

"I am very happy that in the USA there are laws against cyberstalking. I think that the people who are damaging the reputation of Mr. Stanek are criminals."

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Right. I've just signed up to Staneks message board! What should I expect?

Tell us true. Is there even anyone there, or does it appear to be all alts?

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Tell us true. Is there even anyone there, or does it appear to be all alts?

I have a hard time believing there would be more than 4 or 5 people on this planet that would be enthusiastic enough about his books to bother searching for a forum, let alone join one.

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I think Stanek is a mind-enslaving force. He doesn't have alternatives, he's just controlled all people to think he rules.

STANEK PWNS US ALL!

HE... don't let him control me... R00LZ!

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As I love just whiling away the time with nonsense at work, from the Stan eck Message board:

Over 20,000 Posts with 400+ Members

Welcome to the Official Robert Stanek message board! This discussion forum is for Robert Stanek's books, RPGs based on the books and other Ruin Mist stuff. We also have discussion forums for other authors, movies, games, roleplay, television, and music. The RSMB was founded in 2003 and is a family and teen friendly site. If you are looking for one of the other Robert Stanek fan sites and discussion forums, here are places to start: Details on Stanek's books: Bibliography. Publisher's Web sites: Reagent Press and RP Books. R.S. fansites: Top 25 Fan Sites. But why waste your time with those other sites when you can become a member here? CLICK HERE TO REGISTER. If you want to find the official sites of the author, try Official Robert Stanek Site or Official Ruin Mist Site. There's also a site for the world of the magic lands. ***The Board Upgrade to V4 is complete as of May 27, 2005. The good news is that the new boards run faster and have more features. The bad news is we had to delete all the threads from 2002-2004. All members will need to re-activate and re-validate accounts. Sorry for the inconvenience. ***

The number 2 poster on the Forum:

Name: dragonlord

Gender: Male

Posts: 1,041

Date Registered: Oct 19, 2003, 5:51pm

I count a total of 39 different sections one can post in including, and not limited to:

In the Service of Dragons

Discussion for In The Service Of Dragons, the new series by Robert Stanek.

Learn About Robert Stanek

Robert Stanek is the international, bestselling, award-winning author of over 50 books for young people and adults. These pages talk about his books, life, and work. Members can create pages and contribute to this section.

Learn About Robert Stanek

Robert Stanek is the international, bestselling, award-winning author of over 50 books for young people and adults. These pages talk about his books, life, and work. Members can create pages and contribute to this section.

Learn About Robert Stanek

Robert Stanek is the international, bestselling, award-winning author of over 50 books for young people and adults. These pages talk about his books, life, and work. Members can create pages and contribute to this section.

From the Learn About section , everything you wanted to know about "flaming" but were afraid to ask.

The Big Screen???

I think I'll go bleach my eyeballs now.

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Oh. My. God.

I just tried reading some of the posts on the Stanek forum. Jax, I don't know whether to thank you for the link or file a lawsuit - I got the feeling that I was reading posts made by pod-people or body snatchers. Sure, all the posts were different, but yet they were all the same somehow. Weird, I know. I guess "souless" describes their nature best. Excuse me while I go wash.

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From Jax's link re: flaming

This is important to Robert Stanek readers because a group of individuals have been posting flames containing untrue, malicious statements about Robert Stanek all across the Internet for the past 5 years.

I'd like to see these untrue malicious statements. All I've seen so far has been true malicious statements :P

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I wonder what Rober* S*anek's opinion is on fanfic. Afterall, he is compared to Rowling so very often, and everyone knows Harry Potter fanfic is a facet of her popularity. The problem with Ruin Mist fanfic is that it is quite likely to be better than the original. Assuming S*anek didn't write the fanfic himself.

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How do you ban fanfic?

I mean, it's like roaches, or mold. It congeals in dark obscure places far from the light of day.

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Or you get your hotmail lawyers to threaten to sue everbody who's ever written, read, or heard rumors of Robert Stanek fanfic. Simple as that.

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