Mo Sneachd Posted June 21, 2007 Share Posted June 21, 2007 I'm fine with that as long as Snape lives. Which is not too likely. Otoh, predictions are never too likely. Precisely one month until we find out now Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Filippa Eilhart Posted June 21, 2007 Share Posted June 21, 2007 I can actually believe MMM has the inside info to the book and would tell about it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kalbear Posted June 21, 2007 Share Posted June 21, 2007 MMM is totally telling the truth. The Internet is Serious Business. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
penandink Posted June 21, 2007 Share Posted June 21, 2007 My prediction: Voldy's dead meat. I thought Lupin was a goner, but now that Rowling's taken Tonks on her great emotional journey, she won't kill him anymore. I'm actually thinking we're going to see Draco Malfoy die in a heroic sacrifice to rescue someone from Voldemort, probably Harry. (I would love to say Harry dies, because he IS a Horcrux, but I'm thinking she'll weasel her way out of it by forcing his demise onto Draco.) After all, Draco's not the one with the girlfriend whose emotional scars she'd have to deal with afterward. Snape had better live. I'm of the opinion that he actually is the devil and Dark and all, but I want him to be alive anyway. He's the only character with anything approaching complex logic. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Arataniello Posted June 21, 2007 Share Posted June 21, 2007 THis could be for real. Allegedly some hacker hacked into computers at Bloomsbury and found then published the plot details - http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/main.jhtml.../npotter121.xml Pinches of salt and all that. Aratan Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MeanMrMustard Posted June 21, 2007 Author Share Posted June 21, 2007 This thread works whether it's real or not. And that's why I'm a fucking professional. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
zakalwe7 Posted June 21, 2007 Share Posted June 21, 2007 The real deal The above theories are rubbish. I've been reading ALL the Harry Potter slash-fic on the net and I can quite honestly tell you that what ACTUALLY happens is - Hermione grows a magical penis. She is fascinated by this and proceeds to have an affair with Ginny. After HAWT sex, Malfoy finds them and proceeds to lock up Hermione and Ginny in his sex dungeon where he forces them into disgusting acts involving Crabbe and Goyle. Ron whose secret passion for Harry was revealed at the start of the book, discovers this and doesn't tell Harry because he wants him for himself. Following the mid-book Harry / Voldemort rape scene and the Dudley / Killer Whale HAWT sex, Ron realises that his ambition of being non-ginger will never come to fruitition. In a DRAMATIC change of mind, Ron meets up with Snape and they both free Harry from Voldemort by having HAWT sex with V (who then escapes), rescues Harry who he has HAWT sex with. Then in a dramatic Lord of the Rings crossover they meet Orlando Legolas and have HAWT sex with him. Then they all go and find Malfoy and have HAWT sex with him. The sex slaves Herminone and Ginny are rescued and they all go and find Voldemort who kills Ron by having HAWT sex with him. Then V dies. At the end Harry wins Pop Idol and becomes an emo rock star who cuts himself with rusty razor blades mourning the death of Ron. Hermione becomes Minister for Magic and has a secret life of HAWT sex with the exiled Malfoy. Ordlando Legolas becomes the willing sex gimp of Crabbe and Goyle who have HAWT sex with him all the time. I read this on the internet so it must be true Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
penandink Posted June 21, 2007 Share Posted June 21, 2007 You missed the HAWT twincest with Fred & George, Zak. How could you? They're part of the big distraction so they can kill Voldy (who, by the way, is having HAWT sex with that traitorous bastard Dumbledore. Actually, they're gang-raping Lucius Malfoy together.) EDIT: Almost forgot - Neville Longbottom is one of Malfoy's sex slaves, and is forced to perform unspeakable acts on Hermione and Ginny for Malfoy's viewing pleasure. With a thestral. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Wolf Maid Posted June 21, 2007 Share Posted June 21, 2007 Zak, that was brilliant. You forgot all the mysterious siblings and hot sex between Sirius and Lupin though. and the twincest. never forget that. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
penandink Posted June 21, 2007 Share Posted June 21, 2007 Zak, that was brilliant. You forgot all the mysterious siblings and hot sex between Sirius and Lupin though. and the twincest. never forget that. Hah. Everyone knows it's Sirius and Snape. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
zakalwe7 Posted June 21, 2007 Share Posted June 21, 2007 Yeah sorry. I had to keep it short. I also missed out on the part where Harry teleports to America and has HAWT sex with Justin Timberlake, while Hermione (with her new found penis) has a guest starring role on Sex in the City Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Wolf Maid Posted June 21, 2007 Share Posted June 21, 2007 Actually, it should be Harry and Hermione having hot monkey sex. How could anyone NOT see it? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
zakalwe7 Posted June 21, 2007 Share Posted June 21, 2007 Pah H/H shipping is sooooooooo 2005 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
penandink Posted June 21, 2007 Share Posted June 21, 2007 Pah H/H shipping is sooooooooo 2005 And soooooo straight. Psssht. Everyone knows they're all secretly harbouring homosexual, sadistic, bestiality impulses. Rowling left all the clues right there in plain sight, people! Ha ha ha ha ha I can't believe I finally made it to 300 posts talking about disgusting HP slash fic. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Wolf Maid Posted June 21, 2007 Share Posted June 21, 2007 Fine. Let's ship Harry and the Broom. (Harmony shippers give me the creeps) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Usotsuki Posted June 21, 2007 Share Posted June 21, 2007 How can this thread have made it to the second page without Cerys appearing in a slick of lube? If this continues much longer I may have to resurrect the Gordon Brown-Tony Blair story which if I recall correctly had a HAWT SOCKS scene before getting to the HAWT SECKS. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
zakalwe7 Posted June 21, 2007 Share Posted June 21, 2007 Oh yeah. I loved that one - if only John Prescott appeared in. I'm most partial to Thundercats slash fic Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chaldanya Posted June 21, 2007 Share Posted June 21, 2007 Please, Lord on High, don't do it, Usot... I'm begging you. N Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mo Sneachd Posted June 21, 2007 Share Posted June 21, 2007 The real deal The above theories are rubbish. I've been reading ALL the Harry Potter slash-fic on the net You never cease to impress me. That is an awesome acchievement. Also, you win at fanfiction, although I must admit that yours included quite a couple of squick factors. On a completely worksafe note, I pre-ordered the 7th book today. I'm looking forward to seeing some theories proven wrong. Please. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
zakalwe7 Posted June 21, 2007 Share Posted June 21, 2007 You never cease to impress me. That is an awesome acchievement. Also, you win at fanfiction, although I must admit that yours included quite a couple of squick factors. Thank you Mo Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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