Daedalus V2.0 Posted November 19, 2007 Share Posted November 19, 2007 Well, I have The First Sorceress, and I'll be beginning it soon. Expect summaries of the first few chapters before the end of the day. I must say, this here, on the book jacket, should give you a laugh: Not since Terry Goodkind unsheathed the Sword of Truth has there been such an epic tale of heroism and magic that so captures the imagination as this monumental new work by a master storyteller. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Maid Sansa Posted November 19, 2007 Share Posted November 19, 2007 Good luck. I'll be waiting right here. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Atreides Posted November 19, 2007 Share Posted November 19, 2007 Yay for more bad-book bashing! The more the better. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Daedalus V2.0 Posted November 19, 2007 Author Share Posted November 19, 2007 Okay, the prologue is on a ship in the middle of the ocean, after some big war that lasted for a long time and in which lots of people died. The wizards beat the sorceresses and now only the four most powerful of them, the instigators of the war, are left, and they have been captured. Anyways, there's a big exposition about how executing them would be murder, even though pretty much everyone in the world wants them dead, and imprisoning them would also be murder, so since wizards can't murder people they have to exile the women. Despite being starved for weeks and horribly malnourished, in rotting clothes, the women are all extemely beautiful, and the wizard has to watch to make sure that the soldiers don't, like, free them or something stupid like that because they're so beautiful (a whole page was devoted to this). Then they get put into a dinghy in the middle of the ocean with somewhere in the area of 5 days worth of food (not that that's murder or anything) and the boad leaves. In the end, however, we learn that... gasp! theres another sorceress in hiding back in the mainland. Zomg! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jaxom 1974 Posted November 19, 2007 Share Posted November 19, 2007 In the end, however, we learn that... gasp! theres another sorceress in hiding back in the mainland. Zomg! Amazing how that tied into the title of the book, eh? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CryHavoc Posted November 19, 2007 Share Posted November 19, 2007 Turn back while you can. Please. I stumbled upon The Fifth Sorceress in an airport, looking for something to read on a six hour plane ride, and in a strange fit of utter insanity decided after the train wreck/orgy/Goodkind-fest that was the first few chapters that I'd started it and had nothing else to do for the next few hours, so I might as well finish it. It was not one of the best decisions I've ever made, to say the least. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Daedalus V2.0 Posted November 19, 2007 Author Share Posted November 19, 2007 I reply that I have made a commitment to bring the works of Newcomb to the people of this forum, and so I shall. Chapters 1 and 2 are complete. Chapter 1 was from the POV of Prince Tristan, who will become king of the known world in exactly 1 month. We learn that he is really good at the following: Archery, swordfighting, hand-to-hand combat, horse riding, knife throwing, philosophising, reading, athletics. He is also good at eveything else that he does, except politics. He does not want to be king, and as a result has slept with multitudes of women, but never got any of them pregnant and he always breaks off the relationship "like a gentleman". Apparently it doesn't matter if all you're doing is having casual sex with women, as long as you're nice to them. Oh, he's also the most handsome person on the planet. Anyways, once all that is done, he gets into some generic life threatening troubles as a result of his horse being silly (his horse is also extremely good at everything except common sense), he sees some really big butterflies and starts chasing after them. The chapter ends when he falls in a hole. Chapter 2 is beastly long, and has about 50 different things happen in it, so I'm going to take a break for now. More soon. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Marquis de Leech Posted November 19, 2007 Share Posted November 19, 2007 A hilarious critique of The Fifth Sorceress can be found on The Robert Newcomb "Fan" Page Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
williamjm Posted November 19, 2007 Share Posted November 19, 2007 and imprisoning them would also be murder How does that work? Or should I not ask? Anyways, once all that is done, he gets into some generic life threatening troubles as a result of his horse being silly (his horse is also extremely good at everything except common sense), he sees some really big butterflies and starts chasing after them. The chapter ends when he falls in a hole. Judging from the first chapter, I can believe this might out-Goodkind Tairy. Really big butterflys are underused as plot devices. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sophelia Posted November 19, 2007 Share Posted November 19, 2007 Really big butterflys are underused as plot devices. Quite. Really tempted to sig that on the BwB writers group. *must....resist...temptation...* Daedalus - this is very crazily masochistic public spirited of you. Are you going to treat us to some actual examples of prose, or is it too good for us? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nobodymN Posted November 19, 2007 Share Posted November 19, 2007 A hilarious critique of The Fifth Sorceress can be found on The Robert Newcomb "Fan" Page That page is timeless. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Myshkin Posted November 20, 2007 Share Posted November 20, 2007 Well, I have The First Sorceress, and I'll be beginning it soon. Expect summaries of the first few chapters before the end of the day. I must say, this here, on the book jacket, should give you a laugh: I salute you! If you survive I shall buy you a beer. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stubby Posted November 20, 2007 Share Posted November 20, 2007 Well, I have The First Sorceress, and I'll be beginning it soon. Oh you poor brave bastard. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AverageGuy Posted November 20, 2007 Share Posted November 20, 2007 It's been awhile since I've read this book, and I never wanted to read it a second time, but when you get there, can you answer a couple questions that made me scratch my head? 1) What made the sorceresses go crazy and start the war? 2) When did the wizards actually learned to use the Vigors and the Vagaries? I think the answers are: SPOILER: TFS1. The sorceresses went crazy and started the war because they started using the Vagaries. 2. The wizards and sorceresses learned to use the Vigors and Vagaries during the war. But I may have misread. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Wolf Maid Posted November 20, 2007 Share Posted November 20, 2007 Oh, Daedalus...We'll erect a...statue of you should you expire while reading this. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Daedalus V2.0 Posted November 20, 2007 Author Share Posted November 20, 2007 It's been awhile since I've read this book, and I never wanted to read it a second time, but when you get there, can you answer a couple questions that made me scratch my head? 1) What made the sorceresses go crazy and start the war? 2) When did the wizards actually learned to use the Vigors and the Vagaries? I think the answers are: SPOILER: TFS1. The sorceresses went crazy and started the war because they started using the Vagaries. 2. The wizards and sorceresses learned to use the Vigors and Vagaries during the war. But I may have misread. Nah, you're close to correct, but not. It'll all be explained in the next chapter, which I'll be putting up soon (right after dinner). Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ecchi-Oni Posted November 20, 2007 Share Posted November 20, 2007 This thread should be fun. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Wolf Maid Posted November 20, 2007 Share Posted November 20, 2007 And painful. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ecchi-Oni Posted November 20, 2007 Share Posted November 20, 2007 And painful. Most fun things are in the end. I just hope we'll see a Paolini kicking thread too so I don't have to read his novels. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Daedalus V2.0 Posted November 20, 2007 Author Share Posted November 20, 2007 Alright, a prose sample to whet your appetites while I write up chapter 2. "You have been collectively tried and found guilty of crimes against humanity," he (The wizard in the prologue) began, looking sternly into all four pairs of eyes in turn, "The charges against you include inciting civil war, revolution (different than civil war?), murder, the rape and torture of both sexes (presumably because this is worse than raping and/or torturing only one gender) and systematic pogroms (ooh, big word) of military and civilian citizens alike.? He paused, tears running down his face, the water from his eyes tumbling down to join the water from the sky already there, "The physical and psychological damage you have done will take generations to repair. We can see no end to the calamities (more big words!) you have caused." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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