Jump to content

Thongor! Brak! Lankar! Kothar!


Recommended Posts

  • 1 month later...

Right, it's been a while, but Thongor isn't going anywhere, and it's time to resume his adventures. Leaving Princess Sumia in the evil grasp of Vaspas Ptol, we return to the Lost City of Omm where Thongor is trying out his new cloaking device - as you may recall, he's been captured by a vampire warlock, and imprisoned in a room made of nebium.

He's using the time-honoured trick of putting pillows in his bed to make it look like he's still sleeping, then he hides behind the door, his invisibility armlet on.

His keen ear detected the shuffle of approaching footsteps. They came to a stop before the great portal of black nebium. There was the hollow clang of a bolt being withdrawn... then the doors swung inwards, revealing ten of the white-faced, dead-eyed zombie-men, bearing great platters of food. Thongor's lips twisted in a savage, invisible grin. Fatten up the lambs for the slaughter! No wonder they had been fed so sumptuously.... so that Xothun could dine later from their hot, rich blood!

I can't actually read the word "sumptuous" now without thinking of The Duke. But anyway.

The guards drag away Narjan Zash Dromor, who is Thongor's disposable cellmate (I think Ald Turmis is safe, being Thongor's buddy). This is handy for Thongor, as he can now follow them as they take Xothun his next victim.

The rest of the palace is less sumptuous than Thongor's quarters, in fact it's rather run-down and shabby, with the former grandeur eaten away by the nameless agents of time etc etc. Our Hero was initially worried about his ability to find the secret lair of Xothun in this vast labyrinth of a palace, but when they get there it turns out Xothun has a name-plate on his door.

As you might expect, Xothun is not a pleasant-looking fellow.

Xothun was indeed like a spider or a bloated, incredibly fat and loathsome leech. His flesh was spongy, pallid, dewed with perspiration, and it hung upon his body in repulsive rolls and bladders of unhealthy, fatty tissue. His torso was a great, squat globe of bulging flesh. His arms and legs were flippers of dangling blubber rather than limbs.

No thews on him, then.

He's sitting in a laboratory, which is like a typical mad scientist's wet dream: flashing globes of lightning, bubbling vats, bolts arcing between copper rods etc.

But what's this? He can see through Thongor's cloaking device! He flips some switches and Thongor becomes visible again. Thongor panics and starts to attack him, but Xothun says "Don't kill me, let's have a chat instead" and for some reason Thongor agrees.

How did he spot Thongor? Well, apparently he has some kind of device which gathers up all the sounds from the city and pours them through tubes into his ear, thus he was able to eavesdrop on Thongor explaining his plan to Ald Turmis. But now he has "merely rendered its powers negative by countering it with an opposing force of the same vibration and intensity".

Yes, Xothun claims to be a scientist, none of this wizardry nonsense. He shows Thongor another one of his inventions, which is a "videosphere", through which he observed the floater and resolved to nick it, with his Magnetic Ray. And now he plans to steal the secrets of the floater, drink Thongor's blood, then build a new army of floaters to go out and get more victims. Who'd have thought the floater would turn out to be such a vital plot point?

Thongor now lunges for Xothun, but is stopped by a forcefield! However, a forcefield is no match for Thongor's thews. With iron strength he battles his way through the forcefield. Xothun is getting a bit worried now, and turns up the power, so even the mighty barbarian is struggling. But now Narjan Zash Dromor springs to his aid!

End of chapter! Not much of a cliffhanger really though, as we all know Thongor will survive... or will he?

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Thongor now lunges for Xothun, but is stopped by a forcefield! However, a forcefield is no match for Thongor's thews. With iron strength he battles his way through the forcefield.

There you pesky Jedis, that that. Thongor doesn't need no gleaming lightsabre to deal with Dark Creatures. :P

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • 2 months later...
"merely rendered its powers negative by countering it with an opposing force of the same vibration and intensity".

Lovely, references to vibration is dodgy science at its very very best.

Your right about it not being much of a cliffhanger, kind of a retarded point to end the chapter too.

Anyway, whats going on with the thewed one these days?

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • 5 months later...

I fail. My bookshelves being in a state of, erm, flux, I seem to have lost my copy of Thongor (it's probably in a box somewhere but haven't had time to go rooting through them yet). The next instalment will have to wait... unless anyone else has a copy...?

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Er, I suppose I could try guessing the next bit; we can see how accurate it is when I turn up the actual book...

Let's see, Thongor is attacking the vampire scientist who wants to steal his floater, and that other guy dashes to help him... obviously Thongor's mighty thews win the day, and the Evil One is defeated. The other guy (can't remember his name) then becomes King of the Lost City and frees all the zombie slaves, and they they turn off the huge magnet and get back on the floater. But then something happens!

MEANWHILE, Sumia (currently a prisoner of the Yellow Druids IIRC) uses her feminine wiles on some guy called, I dunno, Ath Phurthid, who sneaks her out of the city to warn the besieging army about the Fart Gas of Madness. Her clothes fall off at some point, and then they discover the Shrine of the Gaslord which can neutralise the FGoM. But the shrine is populated by the Killer Wasps of Wathphirth!

Karm Karvus... no, no-one cares about Karm Karvus. I don't expect we'll be seeing him again until the end when Thongor has defeated both armies with his mighty thews.

Anyone else want to have a crack at some predictions? I'll have a good go at digging out the book over the weekend...

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • 1 month later...

Ladies and gentlemen, it seems that Christmas has come early for all fans of Thongor, for I have found the book!

*pause to let everyone recover*

Having summed up the Story So Far in my guesswork of October, I shall forego the recap, and get straight on with the next chapter, which is...


Bit of a disappointing title, TBH, after all teh cannnibal trees and whatnot, but I think, with a mere 30-odd pages to go, Mr Carter has decided to start tying up some plot threads, rather than introducing new monsters every chapter. This also means that we're in Sumia's POV, so will have to leave Thongor until the next arbitrary POV shift.

Despite all her previous adventures and supposed hard barbarian-wench upbringing, Sumia appears to have rather particular tastes:

Sumia spent a tense and miserable night imprisoned in a suite of palatial apartments in an upper level of the Archdruidical Palace.

After a refreshing wash and some breakfast, she is escorted by some soldiers to the main plaza, where Vaspas Ptol awaits, along with his entire bejewelled army and a procession of citizens waving colourful flags. Who knew that gassing a besieging army could be such fun? The Fart Gas of Madness is in the care of a priest called Himog Thoon, in case you were interested; could the names get any better?

Some of the citizens cheer at the sight of Sumia - as you may recall, she used to be princess of this city until she was ousted ("many weeks" ago, apparently. She does give up quickly.)

A few pages of description. We hear about the "great domes, as scarlet as the blood-bright cathgan, the viper of the Lemurian desert, gleam[ing] sanguine in the sun", and a view of the army outside the walls, including Phal Thurid, the Lord of Torture, Barand Thon and Hajash Tor. Vaspas Ptol is (evilly) pleased:

He too was gazing with intent eyes down on the panorama of the battlefield, a thin smile of cold satisfaction curling his thin lips as he gloated down on the enemy who, for all their vast numbers and glittering might, he could destroy utterly and in mere moments, at his whim.

Himog Thoon is preparing the gas to pour over the battlements (it's heavier than air, apparently). Sumia knows that whoever wins this battle, she will lose - and wishes that Thongor was here! He'd know what to do!

It had been five long days now since she had last seen the man to whom she had surrendered her heart... the man who, beyond doubt, lay dead in some far-off place. Would she never again gaze up into his strange golden eyes, or see his quiet smile, or feel the comforting strength of his mighty arms about her, sheltering her from the threat of danger? Almost she could wish for death, for perhaps, beyond the veil that stands between the world of light and the world of eternal shadow, she might again feel the power of those great arms about her...

It's all about the thews, even now.

The attack begins! And suddenly and with no warning we're in the POV of Hajash Tor. I think he's the Thurdian commander who is a decent sort and hates his eeeevil emperor. He is smart, and suspects a trap. Oh no, he's off to warn Phal Thurid, he can't be a good guy; he needs an ambitious Sark because he longs to conquer an empire. Barand Thon must be the nice one.

They're ramming the gates! Back in Sumia's POV, red-blood lust blazes up in the eyes of Vaspas Ptol, and he's just about to release the gas....................................

Then he struck with the sword - a smashing blow to sever the leaden stopper and release the Black Vapour of Madness-

Or, rather, he tried to strike! For the steel blade was torn from his grip by an unseen hand.

His sword floats out of his hand! Everyone stops and stares in astonishment! A shadow passes overhead!

And then - a shout - a hundred shouts - cries and shrieks from ten thousand throats!

It seemed that suddenly the whole world went mad.

Only one chapter (and an epilogue) left! Can you stand the suspense????

Link to comment
Share on other sites


This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.

This topic is now closed to further replies.
  • Create New...