Worst Husband in Westeros

[DomDayne]

I would say Robert, and LittleFinger would be the worst husbands, for reasons mentioned in the first post...

Haha, great call for Renly too...

Im not so sure about Craster though... While he does kill all the male children all the females (his wives) don't seem too unhappy if i recall, and he definately didn't kill them or cheat on them repeatedly (im not sure does polygamy count as adultery???)

[Demonic Weasel]

I think that the OP was quite right to leave Joffrey Baratheon out of things. For the few hours that he was a husband, he was playing the gentleman after all, although he was perhaps a bit too fixated on humiliating his uncle at the wedding feast. Basically, he being a terrible person while he wasn't married can't have any bearing on what he was like when he was married... seeing that he was killed before he could do any damage.

Renly I think we also have to discount. There's no evidence that he was stupid enough to crown himself king and not have sex with Margaery at the same time. He wouldn't be particularly interested in women, no, but he'd still try to get his queen pregnant.

Anyway, on topic, though there are several names here that are quite good points, my instinctive reaction is to name Robert Baratheon. And yes, this is from a Robert apologist.

[Archdaimon]

I believe Gregor would have been the nightmare husband for any girl...

Joffrey would probably not have been funny as well getting older and more powerful

[Ocean of Notions]

[quote name='DomDayne' post='1729689' date='Mar 22 2009, 17.34']Im not so sure about Craster though... While he does kill all the male children all the females (his wives) don't seem too unhappy if i recall, and [b]he definately didn't kill them or cheat on them repeatedly (im not sure does polygamy count as adultery???)[/b][/quote]

What? How does that question even come into play when his "wives" are his daughters, whom he keeps ignorant and bound to him? His relationship with those women seem pretty damn twisted. I'd say he's one of the worst up there.

And to people who insinuate that Renly is somehow a bad husband because he has no sexual interest in his wife, I'd like to reiterate that Margaery knew damn well that their marriage was for superficial reasons only. I'd rather he'd not have sex with her at all then just do it out of pure duty despite that fact that it goes against his sexual orientation. That's just extra traumatising for a girl's first time.

[General_Lee]

I'd say it's Gregor Clegane. I'm not a girl but I think if I was one I would fear nothing more than a big, massive husband who will treads you however he likes.... and woe betide you if you don't do exactly what he wants you to do or if he's in a bad mood and blames you for it....

Definitely my #1 worst husband!

[AquariumDrinker]

[quote name='wakiki' post='1729639' date='Mar 22 2009, 15.19']Perhaps Tyrion should have defied his father and not married her. He did swear an oath to return her to Cat if Jaime was freed. He didn't know about Jaime, but he knew he wasn't dead either. Of course, Tywin's retribution would have been harsh.[/quote]


Tywin would have done nothing to Tyrion, other than choosing a new bride for him. Tywin just laid out the alternatives for him and Sansa, and Tyrion decided that is was best for the both of them if he married her.

Overall, he was very good to Sansa. As a matter of fact, just a recent reread of those chapters has shown how far Sansa has come in learning the basics of the game of thrones.

[Bolton Bastard]

I have to say, when I think of how I rank them.

My priority is their (the wives) protection and seeing basic survival needs.

Most on the list pass this (some barely)
Ramsay and Gregor do not.
Littlefinger, you also fail this. Pushing her out a window, while hilarious is not good for a womens' health, so I'm told.

Then comes physical harm against the wives.
Robert, you fail. You raped her, bad boy.
Ramsay, you fail. You raped her, in front of witnesses no less.
Gregor, I like to think you raped one of them. But there is no tangible proof so I can't put you in this.

Staying true to the spouse
Robert fails with flying colors
Ramsay fails (I believe he was already raping around while his wife was still alive)
I would again like to put Gregor here as well, but no tangible proof.
Ned, you maybe fail.
Tyrion, with wife's consent/force. Not that I doubt you'd hang with Shae if Sansa put out or not.
Craster fails (surprisingly the first one in my list he fails)
Renly, you technically fail. Though it was with wife's consent.
LF tries to fail this, but fails. Bravo LF, still can't get the sexy redhead.

Keeping secrets from the spouse. This is barely a blip on my radar as I think all couples have secrets whether they admit to them or not.
Ned, you got one.

Which is why I'll always put Ramsay and Gregor before the likes of Caster. Caster was a sleezeball, scum of the earth. No doubt in my mind. But he did take care of survival needs, unlike Ramsay, Gregor, and LF.

[Paxter]

[quote name='Ocean of Notions' post='1729748' date='Mar 23 2009, 07.50']And to people who insinuate that Renly is somehow a bad husband because he has no sexual interest in his wife, I'd like to reiterate that Margaery knew damn well that their marriage was for superficial reasons only.[/quote]

I understand that Margaery was accepting of the "arrangement" between Renly and her brother, but that does not make Renly a good husband. Would you like to be married to someone who does not place a high value on his/her intimate relationship with you?

Hence, Renly deserves his nomination.

[AAgurl789]

[quote name='Bolton Bastard' post='1729593' date='Mar 22 2009, 15.31']Low move? Tyrion told her what he was going to do. And she seemed fine with it as long as she wasn't the one being bedded.

After saying you never want your husband, you expect him to be celibate for you?
Have to say this is a case of Sansa being a bad wife (though completely justified and lists as one of my rare moments of Sansa being cool)[/quote]

Nope..I hardly expect Tyrion to stay true to Sansa (he's right to not do so) and I am aware that when Sansa refused him nicely...he said something like 'why this is why they have whores...for people like me.' It's not that he lied to her cause he didn't....but my point was that he dragged his paramour to his wife's "place" and cheating so close to "home base" makes it low...

What would ppl who know that Shae was Tyrion's whore think of this....are they laughing behind Sansa's back I wonder. :rolleyes:

[Paxter]

[quote name='wakiki' post='1729479' date='Mar 23 2009, 02.23']Eddard Stark? [i]Eddard Stark?!?![/i][/quote]

There is no doubt that his treatment of Catelyn in regard to the matter of Jon Snow has caused her a great deal of pain. One only needs to look at Catelyn's deplorable treatment of Jon (a completely innocent child/adolescent) to see how deep Cat's hate for Ned's putative misdemenour runs. Does this make him the worst husband in Westeros? No. Does it mean he should at least be considered as a nominee, because the pain he has caused makes him a less-than-ideal husband? In my opinion, yes.

[quote name='wakiki' post='1729479' date='Mar 23 2009, 02.23']And whoa whoa whoa there to Tyrion. That was his father's doing, not his.[/quote]

I knew it was a bit harsh including Tyrion on the list - he was completely unaware of Tywin's scheme when he watched the guards take her and then took her himself. And you only have to look at Tyrion's reaction when Jaime told him the truth to appreciate Tyrion's remorse and regret for what happened. But I still find it hard to believe that Tyrion, at 13 years of age, was physically and emotionally capable of fucking his young wife (she was around Sansa's age) after watching the (likely much older) Lannister guards have their way with her. It just seems so [i]wrong[/i]. So I felt compelled to include him on the list, despite the decent arguments against his inclusion.

[quote name='wakiki' post='1729479' date='Mar 23 2009, 02.23']Rhaegar was probably always dutiful and kind to Elia, and Targs can have multiple wives, so I think that's pushing it as well.[/quote]

So, crowning [i]Lyanna[/i] as Queen of Love and Beauty instead of Elia, his wife and the mother of his children, was being dutiful and kind?

As for Targs having multiple wives, I think Rhaegar's actions would have been more acceptable if Rhaegar had married Lyanna and Elia simultaneously and they both knew that they were part of a polygamous marriage (like with Aegon I and his sisters). But this was not the case. Elia married Rhaegar, not Rhaegar and Lyanna. Surely Rhaegar's first duty should be to Elia, if he really was a "good" husband.

[Paxter]

[quote name='Bolton Bastard' post='1729786' date='Mar 23 2009, 08.30']Then comes physical harm against the wives.
Robert, you fail. You raped her, bad boy.
Ramsay, you fail. You raped her, in front of witnesses no less.
Gregor, I like to think you raped one of them. But there is no tangible proof so I can't put you in this.[/quote]

You probably would need to add Victarion to this list...

[/nitpick]

[Ser Lucan]

Wait, wait...wait.

Eddard Stark?

NED STARK? How did he make it on the list?

Because he caused a bit of pain with Cat? You've got to be kidding me.

There isn't a single marriage on the face of the planet that doesn't have some sort of painful moment or secret or mistake. Ned was a great father, a strong loyal husband, and a good man.

He deserves to be one the list of best husbands. Failing that, he should NEVER be on the list of 'worst husbands' simply for being, and I quote, "Less than ideal"

[Bolton Bastard]

AAqurl789
I can see the point you are trying to make with this. And sneaking a whore about is generally considered bad. But you're claim that it is bad not because of any moral qualms with it (since you think it is right for Tyrion to meet with said whore) but because of distance? So it's ok to cheat on his wife, but not within a certain distance of bedroom?

Sorry, if that's what you believe. Fine. But the idea that somehow location derives morality is hilarious to me.

And Paxter, yeah the list isn't complete. I was just pointing some of the big ones.

Though didn't Victarion just kill his wife that was cheating on him? I don't think he ever abused her (putting him in the first category not the second)

[kckolbe]

Ramsay starved his wife until she ate her fingers. He gets my highest vote.

Gregor is ALL speculation, but I'm okay with that. He's right up there with Ramsay.

Stannis was a cold husband yes, but never cruel, nor negligent. He "did his duty" like a soldier for breeding, and we never hear that Selyse longs for him, nor that he cheated, which is NOT in character for him. He shouldn't be in consideration by any stretch.

Tyrion (with Sansa) and Renly both should be omitted as well. Tyrion only went after whores because his wife painfully rejected him. Someone said he would lay with Shae regardless, but there is no proof, and he *is* a sentimental man. I believe he would have parted with Shae. As for Renly, I would consider it unfortunate to be married to a man who wasn't sexually oriented towards his wife, but that is not a fault of his. That is a fault of arranged marriages.

[Bolton Bastard]

[quote name='kckolbe' post='1729957' date='Mar 22 2009, 23.59']Stannis was a cold husband yes, but never cruel, nor negligent. He "did his duty" like a soldier for breeding, and we never hear that Selyse longs for him, nor that he cheated[/quote]
There is actually a reference somewhere that he may sleep with Mel to make the Shadow Babies. Of course it's implied and not directly stated, but I'm one of those that choose to believe that is how the shadow killers work.

[Paxter]

[quote name='Ser Lucan the Laughing' post='1729943' date='Mar 23 2009, 12.29']Because he caused a bit of pain with Cat? You've got to be kidding me.[/quote]

You are trivialising this issue Lucan, when it doesn't deserve to be trivialised. Ned's putative infedelity, his bringing Jon to Winterfell and, perhaps most painful of all, his complete lack of explanation and unwillingness to discuss the matter has scarred Cat terribly. How else do you explain her utterly despicable treatment of Jon Snow? How else do you explain truly obscene comments such as " I wish it was you that had fallen instead of Bran"? If you think that Ned's potential infedelity and his lack of communication and explanation as regards Jon Snow makes him a good husband, maybe even the best husband, then that is your prerogative, and I understand where you are coming from. Nonetheless, I maintain that Ned has made a big mistake in his marriage that has caused irreparable harm to his wife, and, consequently, that he deserves to be nominated.

@Bolton Bastard: Yes, you're correct, Victarion should be in the first category, not the second...it's always satisfying when you can answer a nitpick with another nitpick isn't it? ;)

[Ocean of Notions]

[quote name='Paxter' post='1729929' date='Mar 22 2009, 22.38']I understand that Margaery was accepting of the "arrangement" between Renly and her brother, but that does not make Renly a good husband. Would you like to be married to someone who does not place a high value on his/her intimate relationship with you?

Hence, Renly deserves his nomination.[/quote]

Renly was not a good husband, but I don't think he deserves a place amongst names like Gregor Clegane or Ramsay Bolton.

[Paxter]

[quote name='kckolbe' post='1729957' date='Mar 23 2009, 12.59']but that is not a fault of his. That is a fault of arranged marriages.[/quote]

How can it be the fault of arranged marriages? It is [i]Renly's[/i] fault for desiring the throne and wanting to be married to Margaery so that he could have the Tyrells on his side.

[Bolton Bastard]

[quote name='Paxter' post='1729962' date='Mar 23 2009, 00.11']@Bolton Bastard: Yes, you're correct, Victarion should be in the first category, not the second...it's always satisfying when you can answer a nitpick with another nitpick isn't it? ;)[/quote]
Oh yes, one of the greatest pleasures of the site.

[Paxter]

[quote name='Ocean of Notions' post='1729963' date='Mar 23 2009, 13.13']Renly was not a good husband, but I don't think he deserves a place amongst names like Gregor Clegane or Ramsay Bolton.[/quote]

And I think that's exactly what Lucan is saying as regards Ned, and what what wakiki was saying about Tyrion - that they weren't perfect husbands but that doesn't mean they should be placed alongside Gregor and Ramsay. Fair enough. But this thread would not be half as interesting if the only nominees were Gregor, Victarion, Ramsay and Petyr. And interesting debate is what this board is all about :)