Santa

[Ser Scot A Ellison]

YDJ,

I've seen the video your are referencing. It's pretty clear those are stop motion videos posed by humans. Besides,assuming the video is authentic, it's clear Hermie is at best a half-elf. All the other full blood elfs are bald. Hermie has a full head of blond hair. That inter-breeding would explain why he doesn't like to dance, sing, and make toys as the full blood elfs do.

[YellowDogJen]

Besides,assuming the video is authentic, it's clear Hermie is at best a half-elf. All the other full blood elfs are bald. Hermie has a full head of blond hair. That inter-breeding would explain why he doesn't like to dance, sing, and make toys as the full blood elfs do.

Yes! You know, I hadn't considered Hermie's different look, but The Seed is Strong!

New theory!

Santa (Coldhands) + Smurfette = Hermie!:wideeyed:

[Cantabile]

That inter-breeding would explain why he doesn't like to dance, sing, and make toys as the full blood elfs do.

Why do you think the elves like to do those things, though? If it's not beneficial to reproduction, or surival, they couldn't have evolved to have a natural affinity for making toys. Which means that it's their socialization that gives them that natural high from making toys. They're drug addicts, enslaved by the dopamine making toys gives them, just like many humans get a natural high from helping others, because society teaches us it's the right thing to do.

Who do you think enslaved them with their own neurochemicals? Santa. He likely has a very rigid brainwashing system in place, where through their entire lives they are taught that making toys is the pinnacle of happiness.

But you know that every dictator has a shelf life. It'll only be so long before the elves rise up and dispose of the tyrant. Santa will die.

[Mya Stone]

I think in all the pictures I have seen of them Snata's Elves do infact wear clothes, thus they can not be slaves. I therefore conclude that Santa provides sanctuary to the formaly enslaved house elves of the wizarding world.

Pebs, not much in this thread has made me crack anything more than my knuckles, but this had me laughing. Thank you. :)

[aimlessgun]

Why do you think the elves like to do those things, though? If it's not beneficial to reproduction, or surival, they couldn't have evolved to have a natural affinity for making toys. Which means that it's their socialization that gives them that natural high from making toys. They're drug addicts, enslaved by the dopamine making toys gives them, just like many humans get a natural high from helping others, because society teaches us it's the right thing to do.

Who do you think enslaved them with their own neurochemicals? Santa. He likely has a very rigid brainwashing system in place, where through their entire lives they are taught that making toys is the pinnacle of happiness.

But you know that every dictator has a shelf life. It'll only be so long before the elves rise up and dispose of the tyrant. Santa will die.

What if they were bred or engineered for it though? And it was the best way for them to achieve happiness? Would it still be morally wrong even if giving up toy-slavery would make then less happy?

[Cantabile]

What if they were bred or engineered for it though? And it was the best way for them to achieve happiness? Would it still be morally wrong even if giving up toy-slavery would make then less happy?

Elfs, by all evidence, possess the same intellectual capacity of humans. Breeding them as slave labor is as morally corrupt as rising children to be merry little sex slaves would be.

[aimlessgun]

Elfs, by all evidence, possess the same intellectual capacity of humans. Breeding them as slave labor is as morally corrupt as rising children to be merry little sex slaves would be.

But it's already been done. Nothing we can do about it now (if we accept the premise of genetic predisposition to toy building). Regardless of how they got there, the elf race must build toys.

So what are the options? Bring Santa to justice? Even assuming such a thing was possible, what to do with these elfs? Santa provided a mysterious, unlimited source of raw material and the most efficient distribution system ever seen. Without him, are we going to take over those responsibilities? Use precious resources to supply the elfs with materials and then ship the resulting toys around the globe, just to keep those little buggers happy?

And bringing Santa to justice would not be without a cost. I think we can draw a lesson from Iraq: we may have gotten Saddam, but in the end we are worse off. The North Pole could easily become the next quagmire. Brave American boys gored to death by flying reindeer or eaten by polar bears, not to mention all those who would freeze to death.

I say the cost is too high. My heart goes out to the elfs, but Santa's tyranny must go unchallenged for now.

[Hereward]

Fuck the elves. If they coudn't be bothered to come to the aid of Gondor, I can't be bothered to campaign against their enslavement.

[Ser Scot A Ellison]

Hereward,

Elfs =/= Elves.

;)

[Hereward]

Prove it.

[Cantabile]

I say the cost is too high. My heart goes out to the elfs, but Santa's tyranny must go unchallenged for now.

What are we to do then, wait until the North Pole's economy continues to deteriorate, and it's society collapse? Are we to make the same mistakes with the North Pole as we have with North Korea? Nay, I tell you!

Santa is gone for a full night on Christmas, delivering presents to children. Which means only Mrs. Claus is there to safeguard the factories. We can infiltrate the North Pole, and liberate the elfs while Santa is gone, ending his tyranny in one fell swoop.

Hereward,

Elfs =/= Elves.

What irritates me is that Firefox's spellchecker says that 'elfs' is incorrect and it should be 'elves'

Clearly Tolkien fanboys wrote the spell-checker.

[All-for-Joffrey]

I hope this hasn't been posted already but I thought this video was very relevant to the topic.

Worst Dad ever? OR best dad ever?

[Cantabile]

How does a child even end up believing in Santa if their parents explicitely say Santa doesn't exist? I've never heard of such a thing occuring with religion, with a kid believing in God if the parents are atheists and teach him the exact opposite. So why the hell is this happening with the big red man? (And I'm saying younger children. Older kids can end up forming their own religious opinions, I know)

[Old Nan]

Shouldn't you be the one arguing for a "genetic" tendency toward religion?

[Cantabile]

Why would I possibly believe religious is genetic? It's nothing more than acculturation. However, in neuroscience there is a popular theory that religion is simply a byproduct of various moral intuitions, though, which are quite biological. These are:

-Suffering

-Hierarchy

-In-group/out-group bias

-Purity

[Old Nan]

So the neuroscientist god is quadripartite?

[Cantabile]

When I was out walking earlier this afternoon a father and his son were in their yeard, and the kid entered a storage shed. I heard the father scream, "NO, DON'T GO IN THERE!" at the top of his lungs, and then the child asking why there were a bunch of presents there.

How does a parent handle that one? Say they're for friends or coworkers, then repackage them so the kid doesn't know? Lie and say Santa came earlier that week and asked if he could store the presents there 'cause he was running out of room on his sleigh?

Or perhaps one more soul has stopped believing, stabbing the existence of Santa. Belief is a numbers game, and once enough kids learn the truth, Santa will cease to exist.

[Ser Barry]

Why were a father and his son walking on TG?

[Cantabile]

TG?

[Lord O' Bones]

TG?

Terry Goodkind. Tairy. The Yeard. Apparently, a father and son was walking in him. And there was a shed.

San Francisco is a funny place.