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Victarion's Secret?


ugashep

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Loras' thoughts about Renly: when the sun sets not candle can replace him, he was the best, he should have been the King.



Jon's thoughts about Rhaegar: my silver prince, with purple eyes, his harp made all woman cry...



Ned's thoughts about Robert: omg he was muscled like a maiden fantasy, a horned god, all big and strong and muscled and big and did I say strong already? And his laugh... oh... like a storm! Ah, and he had a big big hammer.




Like, yeah...


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Loras' thoughts about Renly: when the sun sets not candle can replace him, he was the best, he should have been the King.

Jon's thoughts about Rhaegar: my silver prince, with purple eyes, his harp made all woman cry...

Ned's thoughts about Robert: omg he was muscled like a maiden fantasy, a horned god, all big and strong and muscled and big and did I say strong already? And his laugh... oh... like a storm! Ah, and he had a big big hammer.

Like, yeah...

Now be fair. Robert actually did have an actual hammer that was really big and heavy. Laughing like a storm is not a romantic comment at all. Horned god does sound funny though.

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Now be fair. Robert actually did have an actual hammer that was really big and heavy. Laughing like a storm is not a romantic comment at all. Horned god does sound funny though.

I know, I'm only joking, but still Ned's thoughts are phrased in a way that they have a more erotic undertone than those of the real gay dudes there. AFAIR, Jon hasn't mentioned Rhaegar's long fingers like Cersei has...

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OP, I think your friend either did not read the books or suffers from an insanely acute case of crackpot. Please make sure to consult the nearest ASOIAF by George Martin.


Now jokes aide, I think that Victarion being gay has to go with Quainthe is Rhaegar or Ned is gay... it's just...too much.



Anyway had a good laugh or two while reding this thread


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I know, I'm only joking, but still Ned's thoughts are phrased in a way that they have a more erotic undertone than those of the real gay dudes there. AFAIR, Jon hasn't mentioned Rhaegar's long fingers like Cersei has...

I wonder if GRRM chose that phrasing deliberately just for all the crackpotters in the land. :lol:

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I wonder if GRRM chose that phrasing deliberately just for all the crackpotters in the land. :lol:

I sometimes have the impression that George Martin is a massive troll that that is playing mind-games with all the crackpotters...

... and people in general

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I wonder if GRRM chose that phrasing deliberately just for all the crackpotters in the land. :lol:

It doesn't take very much for crackpotters to come up with their crazy theories. In their mind, character's fart can be interpreted as sign of gayness or hidden Targaryen.
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It doesn't take very much for crackpotters to come up with their crazy theories. In their mind, character's fart can be interpreted as sign of gayness or hidden Targaryen.

and preferably both, but I suppose it makes sense - if all the Targaryens are gay, you kinda need a reliable source of hidden ones

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I mean, a MENSA candidate he's not, but what makes him the biggest Idiot in Westeros?

Here's what makes him the biggest idiot in Westeros.

Vicatorion wants to be King of the Iron Isles. He puts himself forth as a candidate at the Kingsmoot. Euron wins. Euron sends him to start war against Highgarden. Victarion is upset that Euron is stealing away all of Victarion's loyalists by awarding them money and titles. Then Euron tells him "you need to go sail far away, in a long and dangerous trip, to get this woman I want to marry. Or are you scared? Then I'll go myself."

A smart man would say "Yes Euron, you're a better sailor than me, why don't you go get here. I'll stay here and keep the throne warm for you." With any luck, Euron is dead and Victarion becomes King.

An idiot would say "Scared? Me? How dare you! Of course I'll go!"

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And to address the original topic: No, Victarion is not gay. Though another mark of his stupidity is that he captures a slave ship full of women from the pleasure houses of Lys, and he takes the most beautiful of those woman and sets them on fire as a human sacrifice to please the gods, while still keeping the slave woman that Euron gave him as a companion for his trip. What a maroon! If you're going to get rid of someone, get rid of Euron's spy, and keep one of the Lysene as a bedmate.



Not that I approve of sex slaves in the first place.


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