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Beardy the Wildling

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Everything posted by Beardy the Wildling

  1. A: Well, you see, Bran the Fast Pass At Any Amusement Park learned from a Targaryen after an injury caused by Jaime, both of whom believed incest was wincest. Thus Bran proposed Sansa give it a try and it didn't work out. Q: Was Jon patting Ghost in the last Episode a rushed retcon to appease angry fans? The animation looked awful recycled (and Kit Harrington looked awful tired).
  2. Well, uh, we knew that in the books, Dany's eyes are purple, but you see, even minor fantasy elements like glass candles, visions, dragonhorns, and anything from the books that would make Euron a credible villain are stupid. The only good things about fantasy are using the setting to fetishise rape and call it 'historically accurate' and giving every major culture a simple, stereotypical hat. So because everything else in fantasy is stupid, so are purple eyes. Sure, we had Emilia Clarke wear a wig and contracted her to have her tits out every other shot, but coloured contacts are one indignity we wouldn't allow. Q: Supposing for a moment (and bear with me) that themes aren't for eighth grade book reports, what is the theme of Jaime's arc? Is it about a man rediscovering that incest is in fact wincest?
  3. Also, I made this meme in memory of such a blessed Comic Con. Is there anything the Ds can do right, I wonder? After all, if they actually did show up at Comic Con they'd be eviscerated unless they said something truly soul-changing.
  4. So D&D cowered behind their competent actors, feeding them lines blaming all the hate on a 'media led hate campaign' and that the 'real fans' still like GoT. What, the same media that pretended D&D's shit didn't stink? That media? Oh, of course, they obviously really wanted you to fail, it's not like Game of Thrones was a ratings juggernaut that every cynical businessman and their cynical businessmothers wanted to succeed.
  5. I find it so tragic that so many talented and skilled people, for a long portion of their lives, have serviced a set of talentless hacks.
  6. That's how Zack Snyder got a get-out-of-jail-free on Batman, ie, the dark vigilante who draws the line at murder, murdering his enemies. You know, by saying 'LOL, you idiots looking up to heroes idealistically, you're living in a dream world, I want everything to be dark and realistic, and for me, realistic = completely different to the source material. Fucking fantards, amirite?' And the audience clapped.
  7. The thing is, I don't think they will. I think, just like what they did with Season 5, they'll disappear into the aether claiming they're busy and leave the actors who actually did a semi-decent job to bear the brunt. That way fans look like shit for getting vitriolic at actors who evidently tried their best, D&D don't get to hear mean things, and they also get actors who give way more of a shit about their characters than them to give them a free explanation.
  8. Referring to the fiction-writing definition of character assassination, that is, suddenly turning all the redeemable traits about a character into lies and amping up their negative attributes to insane levels just to facilitate a plot outcome.
  9. I agree that plenty of stuff from S6 is evocative of what winds will offer, but I think S7 and S8 are really very bare-bones basic events only. There's no way that Jaime is going to say to Tyrion (who he's suddenly okay with) that he never really cared about the people of King's Landing.
  10. I actually doubt, aside from the raw results (ie: Jon kills Dany, his second love) that any of the books will remotely resemble the final seasons. Heck, gardeners like GRRM tend not to have very solid endings as it is, due to the relatively 'uncontrolled' plot.
  11. This here is basically what D&D wanted. Everyone to switch their brains off, enjoy the SFX, and watch actors' faces to feel without thinking. But also, they want to act like it's worthy of serious critical praise and analysis, so they kinda need honeypotters who are still loyal to the show, but also capable of overthinking until they're blue in the face to defend them.
  12. He also had a lovely evening with the Ironborn, accepting their surrender and convincing the Umbers to give him a fancy gift through his expressions of family love. Ramsay Sue is best Villain Sue.
  13. Also, 'let it be fear' wasn't even the excuse D&D came up with, that's something fans came up with because it makes infinitely more sense than D&D. D&D's (remember, the writers of this mess) hot take is that seeing the Red Keep made her decide to 'make it personal'. Whatever that means. Regardless of what it means, it doesn't mean 'make it personal enough that she specifically targets the Red Keep' because she attacks literally everything else first.
  14. Not only that, it actively punishes you for having paid attention and thought about the show. To quote Glidus: Another quote from this vid that's fitting is 'I'm guessing that's my fault for having paid attention'. Because... yeah, that's what D&D think, you're a dumb nerd for doing a better job than them.
  15. The Arya chase scene, and Arya post-season 4 in general, was utterly unsalvageable. I don't know why D&D thought Arya was a sympathetic viewpoint for King's Landing's destruction when literally any extra would be more sympathetic than her. Then again, I think one of the Ds badly wanted something from Maisie Williams, given how she was thrown Ed Sheeran and the Night King kill, as well as a handsome bloke getting on one knee and telling her she's beautiful. D&D are such a spiteful little pair, especially Benioff. He outright bragged about: 1: Not having any real writing qualifications and tricking GRRM. 2: Thinking that themes are stupid. 3: 'Wanting to kill Barristan off even more' after his actor was looking forward to getting a juicy plot. Fuck him. Just fuck him.
  16. To be fair, you're right that Stannis was always consistently portrayed as worse than his book counterpart (Renly outright said he'd enjoy killing Stannis in the books, prompting an understandable retaliation, Stannis is probably an atheist and views Melisandre's magic as a means to an end, he only burns statues to the seven and traitors/capial criminals) but wrong to think that it's good writing to go 'Look at how much Stannis loves his daughter, LOL FOOLED YOU ONTO THE PYRE SHE GOES'. It isn't even portrayed as being for a good reason (unlike, say, taking out a powerful adversary like Renly), Winterfell was apparently 20 minutes away.
  17. Because he gave away a key to the North to a person who has no impetus to become allies with him and claimed to Sansa that marrying the Boltons would somehow enable her to 'avenge' her family? It was moronic.
  18. Kajjo has the burning need to defend bad poosies and Dany kinda forgetting about the iron fleet, even on reserved rant spaces.
  19. I respectfully disagree regarding Stannis (who went from reasonable man to daughter-burning idiot over a camp attack when he was apparently two minutes away from Winterfell, and Ramsay abandoned the tactically superior position inside Winterfell to meet them on the field... twice, and is only punished for it once, unsurprisingly the time the 'good guys' attack) and Ramsay/Sansa (Littlefinger was made into a complete idiot just to facilitate a shocking scene with a character we knew). However, once upon a time, when D&D had GRRM (who isn't perfect, but better than these hacks) on board to keep them measured, they had semi-decent additions, but even then, they had the stink of... their later works all over them. Like Oberyn living in a brothel and Littlefinger monologuing while two prostitutes practice on each other.
  20. If Dorne wasn't important, they shouldn't have included it, simple as. As for Stannis, I'd argue that yes, it was, especially given they did that laughable BS where they make Stannis hug his daughter just so it's even more 'subversive' when he burns her over Ser Twenty Goodmen. Speaking of him, Ramsay was an incredibly laughable Villain Sue. Yet you claim it was good writing. I don't think you realise that in defending the show's writing, you're defending D&D's decisions. Because the show's writing was D&D's decision. Also, regardless of the outcome being acceptable (Dany going mad), the execution really is all that matters. You seem like the kind of person who views stories as a set of wiki points. 'This happens, this happens, this happens, and because of all these are acceptable, the story is acceptable'. Not true. Not even close. How the events of a story happen is infinitely more important than the whats. Anyone can stick to basic plot points. It's like if I were told to adapt Romeo and Juliet, and were told that Romeo and Juliet fall in love, Romeo had an ex-lover named Rosalind, a witty best friend named Mercutio who he causes the death of, has a man from Juliet's family called Tybalt as an antagonist, and eventually, both Romeo and Juliet die. Then, in response, I made it so Romeo killed Mercutio himself because he mocked Rosalind, Romeo and Juliet are only a fling before Romeo goes back to Rosalind while saying 'To be honest, I never really cared about Mercutio', Tybalt becomes the main bad guy and randomly decides to eat babies when earlier he was only hot-headed and merciless, and in the end, Tybalt successfully kills Romeo, but Juliet kills Tybalt in a murder-suicide as revenge. See how nonsensical a story can be while sticking to plot points that are ostensibly fine on their own? Your 'can we agree this plot point in isolation makes sense' rhetoric is a flawed premise from the offset, so you can stop spamming it and acting like it's not been shot down a million times.
  21. I think the Storyline soured from Season 5 onwards. If you can truly call Stannis's character assassination and TV-Dorne 'excellent storytelling', then you're putting lipstick on a pig. Worse, you're choosing to ignore what D&D themselves say. For example, the 'then let it be fear' explanation almost works; except for two things. First, Dany seems to consider her massacre a form of liberation, that is, she liberated the civilians by killing them. This isn't a stark turn to the darkest ends of machiovellian philosophy, this is outright delusional. Secondly, according to D&D, the reason she went nuts is she saw the Red Keep ringing its bells, saw the representative of all her family lost, then 'decided to make it personal', whatever that means. To take the 'emperor has no clothes' analogy further; it's like David Benioff is walking around naked, expecting everyone to praise the quality of his clothes. However, he has one piece of clothing; a tattered piece of paper coloured green, that he's wearing like a cape. You then hop onto this and say 'look, he's clothed, and he's obviously wearing scarlet silk, with a navy-blue waistcoat to go with the fantastic scarlet outer clothes.' See how it doesn't work?
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