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Ser Petyr Parker

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  1. Ser Petyr Parker

    Why are the Essosi so militarily incompetent?

    Until relatively recently, Westeros was full of people always fighting each other. There were different groups, all right next to each other, vying for supremacy. There has also been a martial culture of chivalry and feudalism there for (apparently) thousands of years, with most male nobles raised to be strong fighters and commanders, and able-bodied peasants aware of the possibility of being drafted. To some extent, it was survival of the most militaristic. Essos, on the other hand, hasn't seen the same sort of competition. The land seems much more sparsely populated and much of it was under the thumb of Valyria, so there was less reason for clashes. The culture there is more mercantile, with nobles growing up learning to make money, not to fight.
  2. I'm going to put this all in a spoiler box, just because it's very long and off-topic, but everything here is from the five published ASOIAF books:
  3. Ser Petyr Parker

    Which characters count as supervillains?

    This. You could write an essay (and no doubt people have) on what makes a hero "super", but generally they have some unusual, often unnatural ability. Being a hero also has to be a big part of their persona. The same goes for making a villain into a supervillain. Really, I think a certain kind of story is required to feature superheroes and supervillains, and ASOIAF isn't that kind. But that aside, which villains have special abilities in ASOIAF? And more importantly, which villains are keen to do villainous things? In terms of special abilities, we have a lot of people involved in magic, but not many (if any) who are especially powerful or villainous. In terms of a villainous persona, you have people like Littlefinger. I could see him as a supervillain if he had the right abilities, but he doesn't really. Tywin has done some very bad things, but his motivations are pretty standard, and his flamboyance is lacking. The Mountain is pretty damn evil, but he's more of a goon. People whose motivations are "following orders", "gaining political influence" or "raising the family status" are not generally supervillains. If we call Tywin a supervillain, what will we call Ser Goblyn the Green or the Japer? The only character that comes to mind at the moment with both supervillain-level abilities and persona is from the show. Edit: Actually the Smiling Knight, from what we know so far, seems to almost qualify. He has the evil, the branding, the skill and the independence to be a supervillain. The Faceless Men also have a lot of potential to produce both superheroes and supervillains, being more than a bit League of Assassins. If they do have a grand plan as some think, it gets even better.
  4. Ser Petyr Parker

    The prevalence of godswoods and the lingering of the Old Gods

    At one point it seems as if the Moon Door - made of weirwood - is better than nothing: And I think someone says this at some point:
  5. I suspect in the Hound's trial, "something" really did affect the result so the Hound would be declared innocent. It could just be chance, but just as the Hound is apparently about to lose the fight, he somehow manages to cut through Beric's sword and win in one stroke. But the Hound is not innocent, so this only makes sense if you believe the "something" that influenced the result believes there is something more important than simple guilt or innocence in this case. Perhaps it believes the Hound had a good excuse, or that if he's given a chance to live he'll end up doing more good than bad. Perhaps you could make a case that the same force influenced Tyrion's second trial. Although we know Tyrion was innocent, maybe declaring him so would have achieved little. After he escaped, Tyrion descended further into drink and self pity, but came out of it and ended up apparently still able to do something useful. If he had been declared innocent, his name had already been dragged through the mud and his reputation, such as it was, was ruined, so he couldn't take a position of responsibility, and he would have still been depressed. So perhaps if he had been declared innocent he would have just drunk himself to death in King's Landing, or been killed by Cersei anyway. Perhaps losing the trial, killing his father and Shae, then escaping to Essos was the best path for him. The tiniest bit of "evidence": In the Hedge Knight:
  6. Ser Petyr Parker

    When jon became lord commander who put the bird in the...

    We don't know Bloodraven was skinchanging the raven. That's one theory, and not one I'm a big fan of. Mormont's raven is amusing and annoying, so I much prefer the idea that this is its own character. Those bells you mentioned remind me of a song. Does anyone plug their ears in the story you mentioned? Some of the lyrics:
  7. Ser Petyr Parker

    Food and Drink in ASOIF

    In the real world you have cultures where (some) people like to try and cook fish while keeping them alive even to the plate, because they believe it tastes a bit better, and others where people (supposedly) ensure they kill animals in painful ways for the same reason. Even foie gras has a cartoonish evilness to it. Although "unborn puppy on a stick" sounds over the top, plenty of real things do too.
  8. Ser Petyr Parker

    Food and Drink in ASOIF

    Well I shouldn't have said "how it's normally identified in Europe" in that it might not apply to the majority of places, but it most certainly is how it works in many parts of Europe, including places that don't speak Romance languages (where it's not always a recent idea - cheddar has been called cheddar for hundreds of years, for example).
  9. Ser Petyr Parker

    When jon became lord commander who put the bird in the...

    I'll watch the video later when I can, but... let's just say I'm sceptical for now. For one thing, that's just one of about a hundred situations where Mormont's raven says "corn". As for how much there was to eat, the horsemeat is what the NW brought with them, and Craster only provides two loaves of bread. Anyway, I don't think the mutiny needs another explanation at all. Chett and co. already had a similar plan, and all the brothers there had been through considerable stress, hardship and fear. The spark that sets it off feels natural, too. People's mouths get the better of them after all the frustration and fear boils over, and it still almost died down except that Craster wouldn't let it go either.
  10. Ser Petyr Parker

    Rhaegar was WAY better than Robert

    What are you referring to? If you mean Lyanna, how is that justified?
  11. Ser Petyr Parker

    Food and Drink in ASOIF

    There are actually quite a few new world crops available in Westeros: sweetcorn, blueberries, peanuts, pecans, sunflowers and various gourds including melons come up, as well as the peppers you mentioned. Of course, some of these could be different plants with the same name. As for cheese, at least once there is a choice of two kinds! I looked into it some more and there is also mention of "veined white cheese", another "veined with wine", a "yellow cheese", goat cheese, soft cheese and hard cheese. Nothing about where the cheese actually comes from, though, which is how it's normally identified in Europe, at least. There doesn't seem to be a lot of that in Westeros, though - considering the size of Dorne, you'd think people might be more specific than just saying "Dornish" when referring to their wine.
  12. Ser Petyr Parker

    When jon became lord commander who put the bird in the...

    Wait... what?
  13. Ser Petyr Parker

    So how does pouring molten gold on someone's head kill you?

    In the end that article doesn't really add much. Since the steam is just a product of heating an organism largely made up of water, it's just a roundabout way of saying the heat kills you. You might just as well say "It's not the hot gold that kills you but the hot skull!"
  14. Ser Petyr Parker

    Why a betrothal between Sansa and Joffrey?

    Heh, sorry. "As you know, your father, the king" is a reference to implausible exposition that tells rather than shows. I thought that was why you chose those words. I found a blog post that explains it a bit more: http://blog.rachelcotterill.com/2010/04/as-you-know-your-father-king.html And there's a TV Tropes page about the same idea, but it just calls it "As you know": http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/AsYouKnow
  15. Ser Petyr Parker

    A hero reborn in the sea

    I can't believe I forgot Davos.