BastardSword Posted January 30, 2006 Share Posted January 30, 2006 I'll start: There once was a Kingsguard named Jaime Whose sister the Queen told him “Lay me!†But she let Lancel screw her So when asked to rescue her He said “First I’d let Roose Bolton flay me!†Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gregor Clegane Has a Posse Posted January 30, 2006 Share Posted January 30, 2006 A man name of Shagwell was droll For that of a fool was his role he would caper and dance make jests and prance but he never could find the right hole. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
My Lady Ashalind Posted January 30, 2006 Share Posted January 30, 2006 the three eyed crow said I could fly or else I surely would die my legs are still broken the chicken needs chokin? and I said what a good boy am I best I could do! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jaime L Posted January 30, 2006 Share Posted January 30, 2006 There once was a man from Storms End To his older brother, his knee would not bend While Renly did pray Loras said: "For him I'd go gay!" And in this way, he made a new friend. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
StarkDesolation Posted January 30, 2006 Share Posted January 30, 2006 There was once a great house named Frey Whose patriarch would not go away. "They want me to go. Heh. That will never be so. I'll see all my kin's dying day." There once was a Bolton named Roose who liked to peel people's skin loose. He earned a beheading after the Red Wedding and if not that, then certainly the noose. Noble Lord Tywin of Lannister High and Mighty as the top of a bannister. In truth, quite the idjit for he crossed the wrong midget and got crossbowed while using the cannister. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BastardSword Posted January 30, 2006 Author Share Posted January 30, 2006 Applause! Applause! These are all great, especially Loras and Roose, but I have to say that some of the chili I was eating went up into my nose when I snorted with laughter over: "....got crossbowed while using the cannister. " Anything that makes me do a spit take or a snort is an automatic 10 out of 10. More! We should compile these and send 'em to GRRM! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cybroleach Posted January 30, 2006 Share Posted January 30, 2006 Three Brothers: Brother Robert liked to drink lots of beer when he was out hunting lots of deer, While brother Stannis would marry borther Renly thought it was scary that's when everyone knew he was queer Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Somac Posted January 30, 2006 Share Posted January 30, 2006 Their once was a bastard, Jon Snow. His mother was possibly a hoe. Yet he grew up strong, Without knowing a mom. And his parents we may never know. Robert asked for guidance from Ned. "I'm in need of your aid," Robert said. Ned helped his best friend, Yet still in the end, His body was lacking a head. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ironmaid Posted January 30, 2006 Share Posted January 30, 2006 There was once a man called lil’finger Whom in marriage didn’t linger While his wife took a plunge His plans were not divulged Cause he made do with the witness singer Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ironmaid Posted January 30, 2006 Share Posted January 30, 2006 There was once a queen engrossed with treason Whose fears actually stood to reason While she would worry and fidget Imagining doom by a midget The faith briskly put her to prison Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Iamshadowkiller Posted January 30, 2006 Share Posted January 30, 2006 In the forests north of Winterfell lies a story which no one can tell of an enchanting lore and the demons of yore who are pissed cause their t-shirts won't sell. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Happy Ent Posted January 30, 2006 Share Posted January 30, 2006 There once was a Maiden from Tarth, who almost got raped in the arth, (for she wasn't that handsome), 'til for promise of ransom Vargo Hoat put an end to that farth. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Arakano Posted January 30, 2006 Share Posted January 30, 2006 There once was a man in Kings Landing, who could see how the things would be ending. So he fled throne and city to the Vale, what a pity, for so, he might be the last standing. (yes, I don´t like Littlefinger... ) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ironmaid Posted January 30, 2006 Share Posted January 30, 2006 There was once a dubious man name of Bronn Whose knighthood was met with a frown Not the grandest of his follies Was marrying Lollys Oh, but that must have cheered the old Crone Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moosicus Posted January 30, 2006 Share Posted January 30, 2006 There once was a lord from Highgarden who was a traitor but then got his pardon his mom killed the king with what Sansa did bring and his uncle Garth couldn't stop fartin' Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Happy Ent Posted January 30, 2006 Share Posted January 30, 2006 A maths student from Chesapeake Bay whiled his days reading Martin away. Through his procrastination he failed examination. (Though he knew R+L=J.) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moosicus Posted January 30, 2006 Share Posted January 30, 2006 There once was a king from the North who sent all his bannermen forth to go south of the Neck to give 'em all heck but he'd find out what a kingdom is worth Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ironmaid Posted January 30, 2006 Share Posted January 30, 2006 A maths student from Chesapeake Bay whiled his days reading Martin away. Through his procrastination he failed examination. (Though he knew R+L=J.) There once rose a usurper to the king Dragon Whose love was fledged to the flagon On his seat of iron for a while he thrashed Till one flagon finally saw him hushed And the kingdom was thrown to the bludgeon Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moosicus Posted January 30, 2006 Share Posted January 30, 2006 At a castle known as Winterfell a place Theon knew very well when he returned the castle got burned and soon we'll see Theon in hell. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moosicus Posted January 30, 2006 Share Posted January 30, 2006 Little Lord in the Eyrie up high At the drop of a hat he would cry He would scream and he'd shake with the fits he would make and he'd yell "Let my porridge fly!" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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