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Hol Horse

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  1. 7/10 Decent episode all around. Not a fan of what they're doing with the Winterfell side-arc; I think it's just adding pointless drama that no one really gives a damn about at this point. The fact that Littlefinger is scheming despite being so close to the Scourge makes it that much more unrealistic - unless he's secretly working with/for the army of the dead. The whole citadel thing feels a bit off. Sam doesn't know the stuff he's supposed to know (or has already learned), yet manages to discover and utilize less clear info to an unrealistic extent when the plot demands it. The great maesters also didn't come off as particularly intelligent. I'm glad Sam's leaving, and I quite enjoyed his "I'm tired of reading about better men" quote. Bonus points to whoever wrote Davos' dialogue. The show's had a lot of shit writing recently, so it was a nice change for once. Best part of the episode was getting the Dream Team together at the end. Pretty sure this fan-service was somehow secretly directed at me, as it's got almost all of my favorite show characters in the same group. Looking forward to their adventures beyond the wall; here's hoping the next episode mainly focuses on them. And really hoping the next two episodes will keep pace with these last two. Didn't have high hopes for the season when it started, and wasn't really engaged until episode 4. Fingers crossed.
  2. A solid 9. It's been a while since I was so invested in an episode; usually I just zone out. This one kept my attention throughout. The dragon/dragonfire CGI looked great, Bronn was given ample screen-time (albeit with some plot armor added), and the episode actually made me care about Jaime. The latter's been pretty meh lately, but this episode brought him around. Also really liked Tyrion watching but unable to help his brother; added more emotion to the final attack. The only things keeping it from a 10 are the awful Missandei/Dany and Dany/Jon scenes, the pond turning into a lake, one too many last-minute saves, and the cliffhanger at the end. I dunno who they're trying to fool with the whole "Jaime might die" thing. The real MVP (aside from Bronn) this episode is Jaime's horse. Makes me really curious whether or not a horse could be persuaded to charge a fire-breathing dragon. #Jaimethrowthespear.
  3. Sansa: "You're technically king now, m8." Bran: "Nah, can't be king - I'm the three-eyed raven." Sansa: "How do you know all of this weird stuff?" Bran: "Three-eyed raven showed me." Sansa: "I thought you were the three-eyed raven..." Bran: "This old dude was the first three-eyed raven, groomed me to become his successor, died, now I'm the three-eyed raven. It's hard to explain." Also the Iron Bank of Braavos - a city built by (ex) slaves - is into slavery? Wut-wut.
  4. Dug Davos' scene(s), Varys and Mel, and Olenna going out with a final insult to the Lannisters (despite the unrealistic loss). Everything else ranges from mediocre to rubbish. As the seasons and episodes go on, I find it harder and harder to suspend my disbelief; way too many glaring inconsistencies and odd choices popping up - and it doesn't help that the writing has gone subterranean. 5/10
  5. It was an okay episode, definitely not as bad as most of the other S6 episodes. Still can't decide whether 5 or 6 gets the title of Worst GoT Season. KL stuff was cool, and I like that they didn't spend too much time on Tommen's grief; his silent, quick suicide was well done. Since Cersei's gone full Darth now, I wonder if Jaime will finally break away from her leash. Dorne stuff was meh. Luckily it didn't last long and the QoT shut down all of the Sandscrubs - preventing any shit writing from being uttered by 'em. North was a'ight. Kinda funny that Davos and Tormund were saying how Jon SnuSnu ain't no king, so there's hope for him, and then he becomes king huehue. LF was stupid as always, Sansa and Dany were thankfully not cringey this episode, and overall there wasn't really anything that made me roll my eyes. That being said, I wasn't blown away by it unlike some people, nor did it induce a raging hard-on. All-in-all, 7/10. Not the best season finale, and definitely not one of the better GoT episodes. It is nice that it promises change, however. Complimentary tilt/trigger material: After the episode I went and read the TWOW Arianne excerpt that I missed, and found it more entertaining than the episode.
  6. It was a'ight. Vikings 'Attack on Paris' episode/battle is still the #1 TV battle I've seen in a long time, maybe ever. In terms of GoT, Blackwater comes close - but mainly due to the dialogue. Hardhome's up there too. This battle was... Lacking. Visually it was okay, but it didn't blow me away in the slightest. Sadly, the battle was the only decent thing about the episode. - Dany/Yara stuff was horse shite. Whoever wrote that scene should be sent on a one-way trip to a Soviet Gulag. The cringe and faceplams didn't stop. - Dany Derpface. With each episode she becomes more and more like a plate of vanilla pudding; basic and lame. I guess we're lucky... At least she's not screaming "fire and blood" anymore. - Throughout the entire thing I was praying to Zeus for Sansa to catch an arrow in the neck. Now I remember why I hated her in the earlier seasons. Complains about their strategy but has no alternatives, aside from going "U dun nuu ramzeeee!" She just keeps talking and talking, and nothing but shite comes outta her mouth. Someone needs to Ilyn Payne her. - Jon SnuSnu is apparently a shit commander now... 'Cause feelings? "His plan is obvious, I wont fall for it." Falls for it. Wow, gr8 jub m8. Did he honestly not think Ramsay was gonna use Rickon as bait? Wow. - Rickon runs in a staight line. Nice evasive maneuvers there. His death was too predictable, and definitely not worthy of an Episode 9 moment. Ramsay's fight with Jon SnuSnu and death was done well enough. I like that it showed that RamRam is weaksauce, and Jon turning his face into pudding seemed appropriate. I still don't think Ramsay should've had such a big role in the series, but whatever - what's done is done. At last it appears his plot armor's main weakness was his own dawgs; no amount of special forces and bare-chested brawling training was enough to save him. Overall, 6/10. It didn't have the charm and wit of Blackwater, nor the intensity of Hardhome, and it's not even close to Vikings' AoP's level. For a 9th episode, it was rather lackluster.
  7. 5/10 The only interesting/good stuff was the BwB/Hound scenes, and even those were kinda rushed. Everything else was pretty bad. The writing was very meh and it was too predictable; if Arya didn't die the first time around, she definitely wasn't gonna die during the rematch. There was no suspense here, and the only thing that her scenes solidified was the Waif's title/status as the worst assassin in history. Hell, I even predicted that Frankenstein was gonna say "much more" after his pause. Jaime's character development is practically nonexistent, there were too many throwaway scenes, and what in the fuck is up with Darth Edmure? Wrap him in chains and give him to the Lannisters? Wow. Character butchering at its finest. The Blackfish's death was also pointless, and the whole thing was sloppy as hell. With two episodes to go, I really hope they step it up. This whole season's been wonky and meh, so it'd be nice if they could make up for it in part with these last two, and perhaps end the season off on a high note.
  8. Oh boy, this one was a hard one to rate. Overall, the episode went by very quickly and there wasn't one single "wow" moment; it was pretty chill for the most part. The Good + THE HOUND. Fokin finally! Sandor's one of my favorite book characters, and one I like even more in the show, so it's no surprise that he's the main reason why this episode gets a bump-up in the rating. I really dig that they gave him a good amount of screen time and hopefully this continues. The Hound's always served bad men, and when he wasn't serving them he was all about himself - until Sansa and Arya. That's where he started to change a little, and I think that after the events in this episode he's definitely back - but I think he's finally gonna fight for the people, without expecting anything in return. That'd be some neat character development. + Ian McShane was pretty badass. I liked his general attitude and dude's very personable. Shame he died so quickly, but if his death's the catalyst for the Hound's change, then it'll be worth it. + Lady Olenna's conversation with Cersei. The QoT was great in the past, but she kinda fell flat when they introduced Master Manipulator Septon into the mix. So it was nice to see her back to her old, witty self. Also bonus points for rekin Cersei. + Marg playin' the High Septon and his cult. This was my original hypothesis, and I'm glad that's the route they're going with. Plus, it makes way more sense than her becoming brainwashed that badly all of a sudden. + No Brienne in this episode. The Bad - The Ironborn. I know they're trying to make Yara all cool and stuff, but I just ain't feelin' it. That whole scene was just... meh. Drink. - Reference to the Sandor-Brienne fight. Everything about the Sandor stuff was awesome in this episode, except for the mention of that horrid affair. It's okay, though; The Hound is epic win incarnate, so it's not a problem, but that fight should never be talked about. - Sansa. I find myself facepalming more and more during Sansa scenes. I get that she's tryin' to compete with the big dawgs, but she's talking out of her arse most of the time, doing questionable shit. It's really annoying when she questions the combat/diplomacy choices by people experienced in those fields, as if she knows jack shit about that. Questioning Davos' position was dumb, and her whole speech about Stannis was awful. Trying to out-north the Northerners was hilarious, considering all her life she's been a South-wannabe. Really made me dislike her, which was a surprise. - BwB are bandits now? Kinda confused. I suppose they could still explain this in the coming episode(s), but even under Stonederp's leadership, the BwB weren't butchering entire communities of civilians. Taking justice/pseudo-justice into your own hands it once thing, but this was plain dumb. I suppose I would understand if Beric and Thoros were gone, and the rabble had no good leadership and it all just escalated from there, but I don't see a show-reason why either of those two would be gone or worse - would turn bad. Gotta give it a minus point for now. - Arya stuff. Arya's stuff has been pretty decent so far, but this episode was really janky. How is it she didn't see that coming? Wasn't one of her important training bits concerned with being aware of one's surrounding? Apparently since she's no longer trying to become a FM she's forgotten all of her teachings. And the Waif - or whatever the fok her name is - is a terrible assassin. My grandmother, wielding nothing but a butter knife in absolute darkness, could do a better job at shanking someone than this scrub. If she didn't want to kill her, that's dumb. If she did, that's also dumb. The only thing this scene showed is that Arya's training was evidently pointless, and that the Waif is all talk and a shit FM. Again, this might change with some explanation, but for now it's very bad. The Meh +/- Jaime and Blackfish. It wasn't bad, but it was just missing something. I still don't like the fact that Jaime's still on Cersei's leash (especially in the next episode based on the preview). +/- Jon SnuSnu scenes. They's a'ight, no issues with 'em. Lady Mormont was cool, but I wasn't amazed. She was okay for what she needed to be. I'm glad they didn't have the Giant speak full sentences in English/common; one word's okay. Overall, I'd say a 7/10. As mentioned earlier, the Hound bumped this up quite a bit. Hopefully he's got more to come.
  9. Aside from Arya and Bran, the episode was pretty meh. Badass Benjen would earn the episode some bonus points, but I gotta give it double minus points 'cause of that lame ass Dany shit. Therefore, 6/10.
  10. Finally an episode that isn't filled with cringey and facepalm-worthy moments. This one was actually entertaining. It wasn't perfect, of course; the Kingsmoot was lame - awful Euron casting/writing, Summer's death was meaningless and no doubt only happened in order to lower the show's CGI cost, and while the last sequence of events was cool, it also felt rushed. I'm cool with not getting all the answers, actually learning new stuff and being surprised for once is pretty neat. However, if Bloodraven knew about the NK's plan and what he was capable of, why not warn Bran not to go all Greenseer on his own. You'd think he'd warn Bran about the NK's touch, considering it's basically the deciding factor of whether or not your cave gets sacked. If he had at least warned him, and Bran still disregarded him, then it'd make a bit more sense. As it stands it wasn't bad, but everything happened rather conveniently in the NK's favor. Also diggin' their style of time-travel. I was confused as shit at first, but after reading some of the other threads explaining it, the one-timeline theory (or is it fact at this point?) sheds a good amount of light on it. A great ending scene; I knew there had to be something special about "Hodor", but I can't say I ever expected something like this. The way they did the scene was pretty damn solid. I'm glad they gave Hodor such an epic death, but I'm still not convinced that Bran/Meera's escape will be realistic/believable and without deus ex machina. Better be a damn good reason why the WW and the undead don't catch them. Overall, it's probably my favorite episode since "Hardhome." Really hope the rest of the season continues on like this, and not like the previous episodes (or most of Season 5). The episode avoids a 'certified wank' seal, and instead gets a surprising 8/10.
  11. That's false. Perhaps doth should taketh thy own advice-eth.
  12. The Good: + Castle Black + Sansa in a better place/mood + Jorah and FakeDaario + Brothaki The Shite: - Seeing Brienne's face in the first 3 minutes - Brienne - Brienne's undeserved screentime - Ramsay produces a dagger from his arse yet again - predictable shank - Littlefinger reminds everyone of his idiotic plan - Scrub Robyn being all scrubby - They made Loras and Royce little bitches in the show - Dany's immunity to fire - Cheesy Dany rubbish (everything from her killing the Brothaki to walking out with everyone kneeling) The Meh: +/- Tyrion scenes were okay, Scrub Worm and his gurl need to shut the Shujinko up +/- King's landing, High Sparrow gets more annoying with each episode Overall, a generous 6/10: Certified Wank
  13. I'm too tired to go into my usual rating shenanigans, and most of the stuff's already been said. I think around a 6/10 is fair - t'was pretty average. The ToJ was hella disappointing tho. It's already been mentioned, but it felt really anticlimactic. No Dawn for Arfur Dayne? They didn't even mention the other KG, did they? And why should they, the dude got taken out in like 5 seconds. Dual-wielding was just hilarious. I miss the grittier and more realistic fights back in the earlier seasons. And, while we might not ever get to see how it all actually went down, I'd be willing to bet 10,000 Monopoly dollars that this was nothing like GRRM pictured the ToJ fiasco going down in the books. Not saying anything super-amazing happened, but Howland Reed ninja-shanking Dayne was really wank. Best part for of the episode for me was What's-His-Face Umber. However, handing over Rickon seems like a dumb idea, but I suppose it's not as dumb and nonsensical as Littlefinger's actions regarding Sansa; I've still got facepalm scars from that one.
  14. Le Good: + Bran and Bloodraven. The latter's appearance in the show is a downgrade from the books, but the acting makes it okay. Probably the most interesting scene in the entire episode for me; really dig the look into the past and the minor Hodor reveal was pretty neat. + Davos + This episode officially rekt all the zealots who were adamant that Jon Snow was 110% for sure not coming back this season (or ever). It's really a joyous moment, but I fear the the rise in salt-level may not be a good thing in the long run. RIP all the posts that were wasted on such useless threads. + Scumbag Ollie is finally in prison. Long may he rot there. Le Bad: - Brienne was in the episode - Lack of subtlety in regards to killing important people Le Meh: +/- Tyrion and the Dragons. Dunno how I feel about this scene. The dragons looked really cool and Tyrion's reaction was great, but something felt off and I dunno what. +/- Jaime. While it's nice to see him trying to be a badass again, I still think his lack of character progression when compared to the book is a big let-down. He's wasted in KL, but I suppose it can't be helped since that atrocious Dorne storyline took a dump on him.
  15. Le Good + Davos and the Wall + Brothaki + Mel reveal (muh theory was right) + Jorah/FakeDaario Le Bad - Everything/anything Dorne-related - Super Soldier Brienne - 1 Shot, perfect backstab on a supposed badass - Bolton soldiers. Leave backs open, choose to go 1v1 instead of swarming their opponents, have shields but don't use them, and take forever to finish off an enemy Le Meh +/- Everything else
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