Jace, Extat

GRREEEEAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA GGGGGGGGGGAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHAHAAAAAA!!!!!!!!! AAAAARRRRRRRGGGGGGHHHHH EEEEEAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I'M ALIVE!!!! I'M ALIVE, FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, I'M ALIVE!!!!!

Excuse me while I hang myself from this balcony.

So you're saying there's a chance?

If this travesty of a prime time event should go as expected I may yet find victory and be alive in this campaign. Football Zeus, hear me! I will batter Sunspear to the ground if it costs me forty-thousand Will Dissley achilles tendons! It is in your name, great father, that I eat these chicken wings!!!

I can't believe how every time I turn down a trade for a guy he gets injured the next time he plays.

What happened, yo?

Y'all are some cruel motherfuckers. Making a demure lass like myself start Markus Mariota against Buffalo. That's fucked up.

We're on to Valyria. Meanwhile, I need a QB this week and I'm looking for a RB. I've got a number of WRs available. Hit me up, folks. Pick this corpse clean before I'm mathematically eliminated.

It's safe to say these are my last months in such esteemed company. It was a pleasure.

I cede my position in Experts. Clearly I am unworthy.

There has been a trade. Only minutes after choosing a minor exchange over a blockbuster deal the Duskendale Dames have agreed to terms with the Castle Black Crows. Castle Black Crows receive: TE George Kittle RB LeShawn McCoy RB Rashaad Pennie WR Jarvis Landry DEF Denver Duskendale Dames receive: WR Tyler Lockett TE Will Dissly RB DeVonte Freeman RB Ito Smith DEF Atlanta

There has been a trade. Only hours after turning down a blockbuster deal, the feckless Duskendale Dames have reached terms on a smaller order with the Coldwater Behemoths. Behemoths receive: Cam Newton, Steffon Diggs Dames receive: Deebo Samuel and Phillip Dorsette

Trust the process.

Final solution.

Russel Wilson- $19- 4 years Derek Carr-$7 1 years Josh Rosen-$1- 3 years Odell Beckham Jr.-$41- 4 years Julio Jones-$40 -1 years Mike Williams- $19 - 2 years Dede Westbrook- $8- 1 years Deebo Samuel- $1- 1 years DeShaun Hamilton-$1- 1years John Brown- $1- 2 years Mark Ingram II- $14 -1 years Josh Jacobs- $24 -1 years Carlos Hyde- $1 -2 years Gus Edwards-$1 -1 years Ronald Jones II- $1-1 years Mason Crosby- $1- 1 years Jack Doyle- $1- 1 years Mark Andrews- $1 -4 years Austin Hooper-$1 - 2 years Philadelphia-$1- 4 years Los Angeles- $1- 1 years Michale Badgely- $1 -Cut

Shit, i thought I posted here yesterday. Can I drop Thomas, Tate, and Snead?

In

My glee is exceeded only by my desire for great and terrible vengeance. Witness me.

I thank you

I would like to have not started Alshon Jefferies who we knew was not going to play for like 3 months. Please insert Allen Robinson of the Bears in his stead. I am signing all of my players to 1 year contracts unless otherwise stated.

You assume correct.

No thanks

I'm whatever.

I just can't fathom how I spent 22 monies on Demaryious Thomas 2 years ago... what the fuck was I on???