karaddin

A bit of "yikes, can you tone it down a little and remember I'm not here for the racism, I'm here for the Homelander worship"

Rest in Power. I'm so sick of the world being this shitty and punishing those that try to make it less so.

Never embarrassing, that's very much good cry

Good cry or bad cry? Within the larger scope of all being good cry.

Yeah. It's been a fuck of a week. It's OT for this thread but it's been closed out by Brook and I losing a close friend and it's just all fucked. I'm so angry without any useful direction for it and so fucking sad. And that's before I get into the fear.

But I'm sure we'll continue to get told we shouldn't worry about influential and powerful people campaigning against our rights. People telling us things can't possibly happen that are already happening seems to be a bit of a trend lately. We certainly do know what type of women's orgs they are though.

Now that you mention it I actually wanted that as well going into it, I got so confused by what was going on I'd forgotten that I'd wanted it but not got it

What were you looking forward to? I felt like I'd get a lot out of a reread and saw comments that the audio books are quite good so decided to give that a try. Fairly early in Gt9 it's already seeding things that pay off at the end of Gt9 so I won't be surprised if there's similar revelations in At9. The comment about the audiobook was that it helps Ht9 is the different voices used by the reader help make it more clear what's going on and who is saying what.

Sometimes I really wish I could have a teleporter just to have a get together with everyone I care about that's scattered around the world. Which seems weird when I haven't even been seeing the people I live in the same city as, but most of them aren't under quite the same pressure at the moment. When I finally see you again you're getting a big ass hug.

Hope you're doing well X. It's a fucking weird year.

That's what hooked me so hard! I didn't know what was going on, but clearly something was going on!

Yeah after Gideon I was suspecting that would be the case as well. Harrow spoilers below

@fionwe1987 I think it's pretty understandable to think his focus was on preventing the kind of conflict that has defined the world he grew up in - one between bending flavours. So we get a council of all 4 bender types so no one people can override the others. Yes he was the non bender of the Gaang, but that was treated as a psychological anxiety he overcame and was never actually oppressed by the others for it. It wouldn't have loomed as large of a threat as the idea of another war between bending flavours so that's where his focus stayed.

Yeah I'm not sure if I'm remembering something that's actually in the show, or if it was ambiguous and the child soldier thing was a theory. The thing that is definitely in the show as that the whole Unalaq/Dark Avatar plan was going way off the Red Lotus script and not what Zaheer had wanted to do with Korra with their original plan.

Without spoiling Harrow the Ninth - while it doesn't proceed directly from the end of Gideon, it does follow on in a way that a longer denouement would have conflicted with what she's doing. I say that because I felt the same at the end of Gideon, but I'm now satisfied with why she didn't.

I love Korra and prefer it to ATLA, mostly down to the character of Korra herself. I don't think S1 is the strongest, I'd put 3 at the top myself, but there was a lot in 1 that was great. The problems that were there are almost entirely down to the budgeting and thinking they only had a single season so they didn't set things up properly and had to rush her getting her bending back in the finale. That scene on the cliff when she's clearly contemplating suicide for the sake of the avatar cycle is devastating when you dwell in the emotion of it, but it's so rushed it barely gives you a chance to recognise that's what's happening. The other big problem with S1 is that the equalists are right, and the implementation of elections doesn't remotely cover all their complaints. What child killing? Are you referring to the plot to kidnap Korra? I thought the plan was to raise her in the Red Lotus, not kill her at that point. So just child abduction and raising them as a child soldier, clearly much better

Yeah that's very much what I'm expecting as well @Xray the Enforcer In addition to the "out of the way" place, I also think this emotional response to the setting is intended, there is a lot going on and our perspective is so narrow. I definitely think the reread would be quite a different experience even if you aren't struggling with it.

I've finished it now and the explanation for what's going on was significantly more satisfying than my guesses, and I loved it as a whole. I'd only just read Gt9 and it was mere luck that it lined up right in time for the next book. There are a lot of details buried in the story and I suspect it would reward a second read quite a lot.

@HelenaExMachina you are correct on that, thanks. It's another small thing that doing right can make a difference. If nothing else it acts as a signal that you're trying to be supportive - a lot of well meaning people will still say "transgendered" but I've never seen a transphobe that uses "transgender" properly. So doing it right is a positive signifier, but doing it wrong isn't a negative one.

Yeah if that were me then asking why I didn't stick with the feminine version of my old name would hurt me - delineating a point of difference way well be part of the point and it's nicer when that's just accepted rather than interrogated. As for what may be supportive, it might seem small but zero hesitation before using the right pronouns and name are really quite massive. Especially when you first say hello, that's the part I still dread with family I don't see often even 7 years on.

Bolded - Yeah, unless he's specifically asking for it/struggling with acceptance or understanding of his sexuality I think going with an explicitly LGBTQ friendly counselor who regularly treats teens but isn't focused specifically on gender and sexuality is the way to go to start with. It makes it clear to him that its the clearly upsetting and possibly traumatic suicide attempt of his friend that you think needs help healing - it can't be misconstrued as thinking his sexuality inherently needs help. A good counselor fitting that criteria that he connects with would draw that out anyway and if he needs the more specialist help he will hopefully ask for it. I don't know whether you should proactively try to get him into your house, but making it 100% clear that he belongs there whenever he wants to be should help him feel more secure. I'd also say don't pressure him to come out to his mum, he needs to decide the time for that on his own and may want to leave his living situation as is for now and not rock the boat. There's so much going on in teen years, having the certainty that he's loved and has a home regardless might be all he needs for now. Of course if he does want to come out to her then support him in all ways you can in tackling that. This probably goes without saying, but under no circumstances ever tell his mum without it being his choice. Coming out is his choice, and telling you is a big leap of trust - it's hugely important that trust isn't betrayed. For questions to ask - I don't have any particular suggestions there, I think it's really a matter of judging how much and what he wants to talk about and matching the questions to that. There's so much variety to what people are comfortable with that its an individual thing. Just be clear in the way you word everything that its your interest in him and love for him behind it, not anything that could sound like you're testing his feelings for a way to invalidate them. What's the social views of the area? Is it a broadly accepting population, or a more conservative one? ETA: My wife pointed out that even some "LGBTQ friendly" professionals can be really shitty when it comes to biphobia, so if you've got multiple options it's worth looking for someone that's recommended in bisexual resources specifically rather than general LGBTQ.

The acts of incitement in the UK are actually the sort of thing that being armed would be more relevant for, since it's encouraging mean to enact violence on an individual level without the power of the state behind it. I actually think the ones with the most right to be furious are those few still surviving who fought off fascism last time it rose and thought it was done for good, only for their children and grandchildren to try bring it back at the end of their lives. We're all more than justified in our fury though.

I wasn't sure if your passport has any kind of paper trail associated that would catch you out, does it? Or is it just a reasonable concern that something might link back anyway? And it's fucked that we even have to think like this. I still think visibility is important long term, and think after same sex marriage they'd have dragged us up as the new Boogeyman anyway, but your safety concerns are certainly being vindicated.

@Robin Of House Hill After the escalation of TERFs attempting to incite violence in the UK in the last couple of months I'd revise my earlier ranking and view Ireland as a significantly better option. I'm not sure (due to not being on Facebook lately) whether you've made a final decision or not but your concerns are looking scarily prophetic now. I'm sure we both wish you'd been wrong.

I don't find them problematic at all because I think you're dramatically misreading the tone. I haven't read the whole piece, just what you've quoted here so perhaps in context supports your reading, but in isolation? Your reading would be consistent with if that piece was victim blaming, but it reads like its trying to identify the psychological processing that takes place in transphobes, but it still locates the problem as inside of them - not blaming the people that trigger that process in them.