[Spoilers] Red Herrings

[Lord Varys]

3 minutes ago, Curled Finger said:

That's very good.   I read the entire thing to infer she was sort of hapless.  I still can't imagine anyone, certainly of Valyrian descent, wanting to visit the home land.  Of course, she was just an angry child.   You've given this 13 year old agency I could not.   Now it's worth a re listen.   

Aerea breaks down and tells Alysanne she wants to go back to KL. Alysanne asks Rhaena for permission, but she refuses, and then mother and daughter have their last great fight and afterwards Aerea refuses to talk to Alysanne.

She is done with Alysanne, Elissa, and her mother. She just wants to go away. Elissa caused her to want to have adventures, and adventures she did have. With Balerion you don't need anybody else. Especially not a woman with a ship who abandoned her - a ship that's likely smaller than the dragon you are riding.

The idea that she was helpless with that beast makes sense for men like Barth and Benifer and even Jaehaerys, perhaps, but objectively speaking a dragon this size should have freed her from any help from an adult, male or female.

Sure, I don't think she actually did want to go to Valyria at first, just far away. And then, perhaps, Balerion made the decision where to go down when he got close to his old home. Aerea wouldn't have necessarily had a fixed goal aside from see the world and have adventures.

I mean, overall, if we assumed for a moment the girl was dragged by the dragon where he wanted, without her being able to do anything about it, how is it that the girl didn't die of hunger or thirst atop the dragon? How is it that she didn't get away when Balerion made a stop before reaching Valyria (he would have been forced to make a stop somewhere, it couldn't have been a non-stop flight)?

And while we'll never learn what she did in Valyria or what exactly happened there, the fact that Balerion got injured and she was able to get on his back and away from whatever/whoever was in Valyria also implies they got along reasonably well. Else, one assumes, Balerion wouldn't have bothered staying close to the girl, especially once he had to deal with the monster that dealt him his injuries.

[The Sleeper]

I was going off Dany's example with Drogon. Balerion was Aerea's dragon but couldn't fully control him.

That is why what Barth says makes sense.

Rhaenyra's comment about Joffrey suggests there was more to it than simply mounting the dragon and be accepted but Aerea was not taught it. But then again Aemond did manage to ride Vhagar without instruction. 

Maybe it is something instinctive, something that happens when someone rides a dragon and cannot be taught before.