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Bumping for Benjen, Vol. VI


King Tyrion I

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And now, for something completely different:

Rhaegar, the rhed-jewelled warrior

had a very shiny vest,

and everyone but Robert

thought he was the very best!

Bob says he rhaped Lyanna;

many think this isn't so:

they think old Bob's just jealous

'cause his suit was a no-go!

So one balmy summer day,

Robert came to say:

"Rhaegar with your rhubies rhed,

won't it be lovely when you're dead!"

Bob slew him on the Trident,

and he shouted out with glee:

"Rhaegar, the rhed-jewelled warrior,

now you're only history!"

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Rhaegar's Ride (Slay Ride)

I hear those sleigh bells ringing,
or is it just that I'm mad?
Come on, it's lovely weather
for a sleigh ride with my crazy dad.
I sense a darkness coming,
Lyanna bumming a ride.
Come on, you lovely lady,
down in Dorne there's a place we can hide.

Giddy up, giddy up, giddy up.
Let's go.
No time to be slow.
We're working on a dragon head, you know.
Giddy up, giddy up, giddy up. It's grand.
The prophecy planned
for me to get lucky with you in my in-laws' native land.

Our love is nice and rosy
and comfy-cozy are we.
Outside are Kingsguard waiting
while we finish mating, you see.
A raven says there's warring,
well ain't that boring? Aw gee!
Seems Papa killed your brother
and your dad, and is calling for me.

Giddy up, giddy up, giddy up.
This stinks.
I need a stiff drink.
My head is always hurting when I think.
Giddy up, giddy up, giddy up.
To war...
with Robert the bore. 
No way he can beat me; though I see why he is sore.

Just get those soldiers buzzin'
and kill my cousin real dead.
Then back to that sweet tower
with a kissing bough o'er the bed.
I'll see my new son born...
Hey is that a spike in my chest?
I think I might miss dinner
but I s'pose it's all for the best.

Somebody tell my Lya
"Love, I know I'll see ya...again."
 

 

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CB, I need an expert opinion here. I've done the 12 Days of Christmas, but I'm wondering whether I should keep it to 12 days and Christmas or if I should make it the 12 Years of Winter?

The basic part is "on the ___ day/year of Christmas/winter George Martin gave to me." 

Working on a food-based one as well: the Twelve Courses of Supper. It's proving surprisingly tricky as there are so many foods that can fit with the melody.

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So until I can decide about the Days of Christmas/Years of Winter, I'll go ahead and post the new version of The Christmas Song that I worked out yesterday.

The Winter Song

Kingsblood roasting on an open fire.
North winds nipping at your nose.
Bawdy songs being sung by The Mance
and folks with frostbite on their toes.

Everybody knows that winter's come to Westeros,
and it's going to last for years.
Those red priests, with their nightfires aglow
will prey on all the smallfolks' fears.

They know the Night King's on his way.
He and those Other guys have only come to slay.
And Night's Watch brothers all are gonna see
the Wall come down 'cause Marsh stabbed their LC.

So Stoneheart's offering these swinging Freys,
as long as there's one left alive.
Eddard said, that the lone wolf will die,
but the pack will survive.

...but the pack will--hope the Starks will--yes the pack will survive.
 

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