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Count Balerion

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About Count Balerion

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    Landed Knight

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    GRRM, languages, history, opera, Tolkien, parodies, being weird.

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  1. Count Balerion

    Third Time's the Charm - Tree Decorating!

  2. HC has an artistic vocation. He takes the dots and dashes of Morse code, and turns them into somewhat abstract portraits of Dolores Umbrage. He's actually exhibited these at several museums. (Although many don't find the portraits weird enough. "Couldn't you at least do something revolting with these and make a video of it?" pleaded one curator.)
  3. Count Balerion

    Third Time's the Charm - Tree Decorating!

    Nothing is as festive as a dragon. https://i.imgur.com/Lh8jfYf.jpg
  4. Count Balerion

    Pictionary 42 - LAST ROUND!!!

    i'm going to have nightmares about my self as drowned god. hilarious stuff!
  5. Shocking revelation! KoA is Ivanka Trump's lovechild, abandoned on the front step of the HQ of the Citizens for Undead Rights and Equality! [That party apparently actually exists. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Citizens_for_Undead_Rights_and_Equality. Whoah, I sound excited.]
  6. Count Balerion

    Would you rather?

    Ser Gregor's, if I had to choose. He'll be better at killing my enemies, and even when he dies, he doesn't stay dead. WYR marry Jeyne Westerling or Talisa?
  7. Count Balerion

    Pictionary 42 - LAST ROUND!!!

    Against numero 1. Mild preference for 3. Random could get interesting.
  8. RB has been having trouble getting a permit to open up a restaurant devoted to all anthropophagy. the restaurant's name is to be Bloomin' Humans. He can't understand what the issue is. If it's good enough for Tyrion and Wyman, surely it ought to be good enough for the gummint?
  9. Count Balerion

    Be as unhelpful as possible, v. 3 (No)

    Nine, ten, a big fat hen. Did the Valyrians have cute nursery rhymes about dragons?
  10. Do we want the contest's appearance or its essence?
  11. Jez B is working on a video where she proves it wasn't the Russians who interfered in the 2016 election, but Valyria, with its infamous hacker dragons. Seems reasonable. The Internet certainly does have a lot of hot air.
  12. Count Balerion

    What's the Avatar Above You Thinking #14 (Finally)

    The reason I don't have a nose is that my eye swallowed it, like an abysm.
  13. Joy Hill is ... well, I can't say the President's hairdresser, as that would be a lie. Hairmaker would be more accurate. She uses papier mache, and the result is almost realistic! She paints it, too.
  14. Count Balerion

    A New Guessing Game?

    Worst party in Westeros? Weirdest Yunkai'i character? I don't know the rules.
  15. HC has founded a bizarre honeyed-chicken-worshipping cult. No one in his house may ever leave it, and they must all prostrate themselves on the floor before a plateful of chicken dipped in honey, and cry out "ALL GLORY UNTO THE SACRED HONEYED GALINACEOUS ONE!!!!!!" Any who seem to lack conviction in yelling this prayer are hit on the head with said chicken. Stay away!