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Post Dolorous Edd quotes


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Do we have a Tormund's quotes thread? He has many funny ones too. When Val threatens someone (Jon?) to cut his balls off and Tormund tells his son: "Har, you keep away from that one, I've got one daughter, I don't want another".

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In ADWD Jon Snow is feeling lonely and Dolorous Edd's personality seems to be rubbing off on Jon. Jon says to Edd, "Not to say that the wildlings mean us harm. Aye, we hacked their gods apart and made them burn the pieces, but we gave them onion soup. What's a god compared to a nice bowl of onion soup? I could do with one myself."

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The pillow struck the wall and burst, scattering stuffing everywhere just as Dolorous Edd

Tollett poked his head through the door. “Beg pardon,” he said, ignoring the flurry of feathers, “shall I fetch m’lord some breakfast?” “Corn,” cried the raven. “Corn, corn.” “Roast raven,” Jon suggested. “And half a pint of ale.” Having a steward fetch and serve for him still felt strange; not long ago, it would have been him fetching breakfast for Lord Commander Mormont. “Three corns and one roast raven,” said Dolorous Edd. “Very good, m’lord, only Hobb’s made boiled eggs, black sausage, and apples stewed with prunes. The apples stewed with prunes are excellent, except for the prunes. I won’t eat prunes myself. Well, there was one time when Hobb chopped them up with chestnuts and carrots and hid them in a hen. Never trust a cook, my lord. They’ll prune you when you least expect it.

~Epic Dolorous Eddison Tollett!

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When the Others attack them:

In the midst of carnage and chaos and blowing snow, he found Dolorous Edd sitting on his garron with a plain black banner on a spear. “Sam,” Edd said when he saw him, “would you wake me, please? I am having this terrible nightmare.”
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What I love about this character is that he's actually quite brave and optimistic. His jokes are intended to bring some gallows levity, but no-one appreciates his sense of humour. So by default of people not realising he is actually a deadpan snark he is regarded just as a droll grumbler. But he is actually one of the biggest look-on-the-bright-side types of character in all the series. Tyrion and Oberyn are the only other characters who share his make-a-joke-of-anything humour, which is usually a sign of genius. If Dolores Edd had ever had any ambition, or been less decent, he might have proved himself as tactically dangerous as Tyrion and Olenna Tyrell.

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