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What is your most crackpot theory? v.3


Pellaeon

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Aegon is a faceless person. Not assasin just a changed face. But I like the blackfyre theory more. But as for crackpots jamie getting his hand back in anyway seemse to be one of the most cracked pots. I like what losing his hand has brought him..the almost peace and redeeming nature. But some people think it'll be restored by some fire magic or something. I would hate that.

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  • Robert Baratheon staged his death, he was replaced by Varys with a fat drunkard from Pisswater who was in a terminal state of liver failure. In reality Robert fled to Essos and works as a sellsword for the masters of Yunkai.
  • In the book there is a redhaired whore in Winterfell. In the tv series the role was expanded to Ros. This proves that she is the bastard daughter of Minisa Whent and Brynden Tully. She was sent to Winterfell so as to be close to her sister.
  • Hodor is named after Walder Frey. Walda the fawn was a Frey bastard.
  • Harrenhal isn't cursed, just buried on a CotF burial ground
  • Daenerys is AA and Jorah Nissa Nissa
  • Pisswater is in fact a place where clones of the main characters exist. There is a Rhaegar clone, an Eddard clone but not a Lyanna clone. Lyanna lives in Skagos and cultivates blue roses.
  • Jon Snow is his own father. In order to save him Melisandre transported him to the past, where he met Ashara Dayne. He is the Stark who dishonoured her. Nine months later he was born. Jon became his own father.
  • Ned never brought back the remains of his fellow Northmen from ToJ because they never died. They liked the sun of Dorne so much and the warm weather that they refused to return to the North. They changed their names and fled to Essos.

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Everyone is a secret Targ. Aegon the Conqueror jerked off Balerion the Black Dread until the entire continent of Westeros was inundated in dragon semen. Every living being has since had, to varying degrees, the blood of the dragon.

Also, Hodor is Dunk in disguise and also Brienne's true father. Sam Tarly is the king of the Others, but he wears a red suit and a white beard when enthroned. He holds little others on his lap and invokes women of loose morals (hos).

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Βrienne was not lying to Jaime. Sandor went to the Vale, recognised Alayne, kidnapped Sansa, LF went looking for her and was reunited with LS. Still in love with Cat, LF abandons his machiavellian schemes and joins BWB. Pod and Ser Hyle are both spared. They discover that Sandor has Sansa and they sent Brienne and Jaime to retrieve her.

Jojen's quote about a reader who lives thousands lives was actually referring to the handful of people who read books apart from the Maesters. That means that Tyrion, Samwell, Rodrik and last but not least Roose are immortal. Roose has gained extra points because he burns the books after he reads them.

Joanna Lannister did not die. She abandoned Tywin after Tyrion's birth. She fled to Essos where she became the Green Grace. Tywin is in denial and insists that his wife died. The only person Joanna really loved was Jaime, this is why she appeared to him in Riverrun.

Ramsay is actually Brandon Stark's bastard. Boltons practised the First Night custom. The miller's wife was actually Roose's half sister. This is why the child had Roose's eyes. Brandon too slept with the girl and nine months later Ramsay was born.

Melara never existed. She was Cersei's imaginary friend.Cersei created a fictional alter ego in hopes that she will end her incestuous affair with Jaime and allow her twin to be with other women. By killing Melara, Cersei actually killed the last part in her conscience that prevented her from sleeping with Jaime.

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