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Funniest Line? Most Humorus Plot Developments? Jokes in ASOIAF?


Fanless Mace

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Time for a few larfs...

What lines in ASOIAF made you laugh when you read them? What are the funniest sections? Is there intentional humor written into the series, and where have you spotted it?

In other words...what parts of the series made you laugh so hard you had Myrrish Wine coming out of your nose as you peed in your pantaloons?

Hodor away! And may Tormund's Member be with you...

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Jon: "Tormund"


Tormund: "Yeah?"


Jon: "Those wards, they're female."


Tormund: *Squints* "Aye that might be, me eyesight isn't what it used to be. But a man loves his daughters as much as he loves his sons."


Jon: "Even so, that's not what we agreed."


Tormund: "Oh alright you black-hearted crow bastard, I'll check." *Clears throat* "Oi, lads, me and Lord Crow here have a bet to see which one of you has the bigger member, pull 'em out and we'll have a look."


*Some immature response*


Tormund: "OH! You're right Lord Crow, not a cock between the two of them."


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Here are a few from ADwD.

ADwD:

Reread this today for another thread, Jaime walks in on Jonos Bracken who is busy with Hildy:

"You took me unawares, my lord. I was not told of your coming."

"And I seem to have prevented yours." Jaime smiled at the woman on the bed. :lmao:

ADwD:

Victarion capturing the slaver ship:

The perfumed boys he wrapped in chains and threw into the sea. They were unnatural creatures, and the ship smelled better once cleansed of their presence. :lol:

ADwD:

Penny and Tyrion:

"What's wrong with the half helm?"

"It's open-faced." Tyrion pinched her nose. "I am fond of looking at your nose. I would rather that you kept it."

Her eyes got big. "You like my nose?"

Oh, Seven save me. :lol:

ADwD:

Penny and Tyrion:

"If we were free," said Penny, "we could find the queen. Or go search for her, at least."

You on your dog and me on my sow, chasing a dragon across the Dothraki sea. Tyrion scratched his scar to keep from laughing. :lmao:

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She imagined how sweet it would be to slam an elbow into Septa Scolera's face and send her careening down the spiral steps. If the gods were good, the wrinkled old cunt might crash into Septa Unella and take her down with her.

"It is good to see you smiling again," Scolera said. "His High Holiness said I might have visitors?"

:lol:

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The image of 3 year-old Rickon brandishing a rusty sword in the Winterfell crypts whilst Shaggydog savages anyone who comes near (just before Robb leaves).

He actually attacked Robb with the sword, which makes it even funnier

I also got a big chuckle in aCoK when Ramsay was all intense talking to Theon and Theon was thinking like, "His lips look like two worms fucking"

Also, the Kingsmoot, all of it, from the crazy Farwynd with eyes that change color (wtf), to the guy who bores everyone with a long ass speech, to Asha telling Erik to get up and the poor guy just trying until he gives up

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