Is Cersei really a good mother?

[Maroucia]

Cersei is not a really good mother, but I don’t think that Queens and Kings were usually very good parents in past history.

[DurararaFTW]

Cersei clearly loves her children more than life itself. But love isn't what makes a good mother. For example, she loves Tommen, but still makes him whip Pate when he refuses to bend to her will. Then there's Joffrey - but Robert deserves half the blame for how he turned out. Still, she never did much to discourage his actions, and doesn't seem to even realize how badly his behavior had become by the end.

I'm going to be honest: I don't think that Cersei is a good mother. Throughout the first three books, I could see that everything she did was out of love for her children. But when we got her POV in AFFC, her treatment of Tommen and blatant favoritism of Joffrey made me lose all respect for her in that regard. Not to mention her first thought in ADWD, upon hearing about Myrcella's mutilation, was essentially "Dang. And she was pretty, too."

She certainly loves them. Her primary motivation for half her actions is to keep them safe. But some of her methods are questionable.

Thoughts? Or is this just me?

First of all Robert deserves half the credit for how well Tommen and Myrcella turned out, if he deserves half the blame for Joffrey. And Cersei is a terrible mother. She whines and whines about how hard it is to be Queen, and how it was all up to her and all that but all that was required of you is to put a son of Robert on the throne. That's the extent of your responsibility, you coulda told Robert to kindly get the f away from me after that but nooo. You had to put your incest baby on the throne and decide to imprison Ned when he did everything in his power to save you in spite of his honour and loyalty. Joffrey is dead because of her. Tommen has dozens of enemies because of her too. she whines to Sansa about the horrors of when he city gets sacked whilst at the same time conspiring to kill the person that saved Myrcella from all that.

[Athanasius Pernath]

She "loves" Joffrey and can't see any wrong in him because he is her key to power, and is both as idiotic and ruthless as her; to boot, he is the little mama's boy. She "loves" Myrcella only because of her female status.

come on, that's not true. she doesn't love Joffrey because 'he is her key to power', and she doesn't love Myrcella because of her 'female status'.

she loves them genuinely, absolutely, unselfishly, and would give her life to save them in a dangerous situation. not only this is obvious in the books, but is even stated by people like Tyrion and Littlefinger, not exactly two idiots.

obviously, as you say, she's a shit of a mother. she's over-protective, jealous, (but not of POWER!! even Margaery understands that Cersei is insanely jealous of Tommen as a SON, not of Tommen as a King/Source of Power) . so yeah, she's a terrible, terrible mother (except that with Myrcella, maybe) but she honestly loves her children.

It's the same with Lisa Arryn. She's a crazy bitch, she is the worst mother of the world, she wraps his son in cotton wool (i just discover this english expression :D funny, in italy wa say 'under a glass bell') but she loves him a lot :)

[RoamingRonin]

I think Cersei thinks she's a good mother but her actions have proved otherwise. Cersei believes as long as her children are close and safe then her job as a mother is done. Protecting her children from any harm is something she does with the pride of a female lion... unless its harm she inflicts herself. Her children are her best weapons in her mad grab for power. Joffrey's death devastated her but all the opportunities it afforded her seemed to outweigh her grief. What loving mother would have sex near her dead son's corpse? She used Joffrey's death to get revenge on Tyrion -- again, it was an opportunity for her to flex her power. Tyrion's plan for Myrcella upset her I believe because it wasn't her own plan. Tommen is now just her own little figurehead -- she doesn't groom him for the throne or try to raise him as a upstanding young man. Catelyn constantly worries about her children during her POV chapters. She spends a lot of time with Robb at the beginning of the war testing his leaderships, questioning all the years she and Ned spent raising him, hoping they did well. Cersei doesn't do any of this for Joffrey, Tommen or Myrcella. She is utterly selfish. What good mother behaves like this?

[LuisDantas]

In all fairness, Cersei is a terrible mother. But alas, terrible mothers (and fathers) are all too easy to find.

What aggravates the situation is not so much how awful a mother Cersei is, but how little in the way of alternate role models her children have, and how strong the pressures and responsibilities they go through are. Were her not a highborn lady, her children would probably have turned out way better.

[FuzzyJAM]

come on, that's not true. she doesn't love Joffrey because 'he is her key to power', and she doesn't love Myrcella because of her 'female status'.

she loves them genuinely, absolutely, unselfishly, and would give her life to save them in a dangerous situation. not only this is obvious in the books, but is even stated by people like Tyrion and Littlefinger, not exactly two idiots.

obviously, as you say, she's a shit of a mother. she's over-protective, jealous, (but not of POWER!! even Margaery understands that Cersei is insanely jealous of Tommen as a SON, not of Tommen as a King/Source of Power) . so yeah, she's a terrible, terrible mother (except that with Myrcella, maybe) but she honestly loves her children.

It's the same with Lisa Arryn. She's a crazy bitch, she is the worst mother of the world, she wraps his son in cotton wool (i just discover this english expression :D funny, in italy wa say 'under a glass bell') but she loves him a lot :)

She does one act which can be described as "out of love" in the entire series, to my estimation, and that's the Walk of Shame. Even there, it appears to be almost entirely about her wishing to end the torture, or at least that's what her inner monologue suggests to me, with her justification coming after the fact. Other than that, she thinks she's all about keeping her kids safe, and yet, as I've said, puts them under constant threat of death in order to satisfy her sexual desire.

I do think Cersei loves her children in some ways, and it's not purely as a proxy for power, but it is not a strong love at all. I would argue that willingness to undergo self-sacrifice is the primary way to judge the legitimacy of love, and Cersei demonstrates pretty close to none and plenty of the opposite.

[Zefsfonseca]

No, she is not.

[The Frosted King]

Op, were you raised by goblins?

Or trolls?

In what world can one read asoiaf and even seriously ask this question?

[Fire Eater]

In all fairness, Cersei is a terrible mother. But alas, terrible mothers (and fathers) are all too easy to find.

What aggravates the situation is not so much how awful a mother Cersei is, but how little in the way of alternate role models her children have, and how strong the pressures and responsibilities they go through are. Were her not a highborn lady, her children would probably have turned out way better.

Child, not children, Joffrey was the only monster while Tommen and Myrcella are sweet, innocent children as demonstrated by Tommen's kittens and adopting a fawn.

Cersei worked to make Joffrey in younger, male version of herself. Cersei's focusing on Joffrey, and leaving her other children alone resulted them in turning out decent.

[MCBC]

Cersei loves her children, I will give her that much. She wants to protect them which is one of the reasons for her paranoia (that & being in kings landing too long). The irony is that in the long run her actions are doing the opposite. She is on the verge doing damage to an alliance (Tyrells) that really keeps her & her children in power.

Is she a good parent? Obviously not. Even her own family didnt think so as Kevan told her right to her face, Tywin wanted her removed & sent to Casterly Rock to be away from Joffreys influence. She just doesnt have the wisdom to be a good parent. Fire Eater is correct in that her other children turned out better because Joffrey was her pet project.

[Forsword]

She could be viewed in many different ways. More bad than good, in my opinion.

[King Brandon Ice Eyes]

Cersei is a good mother. Her own pride, need for power and general bleak outlook on life get in her way. Whereas love is prime motivation with her kids, power is her ultimate desire. Works very nicely for her when the kids do exactly as they're told, but like any good lioness, she knows to give a good nip to the cub in question that steps out of line.

Then she is not a good mother. She is pretty abusive to Tommen and she is responsible for what Joffrey is (like... a monster). Joffrey himself and Robert and Jaime take part of the blame also.

[danm_999]

Cersei is an awful, awful mother.

Look at how she handles Tommen in AFFC; she basically blocks him from taking a role in learning to govern, even though he's interested, because:

The rule was hers; Cersei did not mean to give it up until Tommen came of age. I waited, so can he. I waited half my life. She had played the dutiful daughter, the blushing bride, the pliant wife. She had suffered Robert’s drunken groping, Jaime’s jealousy, Renly’s mockery, Varys with his titters, Stannis endlessly grinding his teeth. She had contended with Jon Arryn, Ned Stark, and her vile, treacherous, murderous dwarf brother, all the while promising herself that one day it would be her turn.

Then she later passively muses Tommen's too soft and isn't magically turning into a leader for some reason. THAT'S BECAUSE OF YOU CERSEI.

[Give Cersei some LOVE]

i can never ever question her love for her children or lysa arynn's however misguided it is. But as a good mother? I really don't know. You have to ask Tommen and Myrcella that. You can view it from the outside as terrible, but at the end of the day, the children are the only ones that could judge it.

[Mr Hodor]

Cersei love her children too much and doesnt want to see them hurt in any way....

but she is stupid person and a terrible mother

[The Storm Queen]

Cersei loves her children above everything else (even herself) but she never learned to love someone in a functional way. Neither have her silblings. To me this is the real tragedy of the Lannister family.

[The Frosted King]

If Cersei was a good mother, she'd have taken Neds offer to flee Westeros.

That right there was the fork in the road, of choosing safety and exile or power and war.

Most mothers who love their children would choose safety and exile.

Look at all those lifetime movies of women in desparate straits who take their children and flee, since to them, ultimately their childrens health is paramount.

Cersei stayed in the vipers nest, and not because she felt she'd have a better chance of protecting them from there.

She stayed because she chose power over safety and disgrace, and thus sealed her childrens doom.

It's cost her Joffrey. Tommens death looms as more claimants ascend in power. Myrcella has already tasted war.

She's not a good mother.

Plenty of women have loved their kids, and still been horribly unreliable, selfish mothers.

Love alone doesn't make you a good mother.

Its what you do in action, that colors your standing.

[Mulled Wino]

Cersei is an awful, awful mother.

Look at how she handles Tommen in AFFC; she basically blocks him from taking a role in learning to govern, even though he's interested, because:

Then she later passively muses Tommen's too soft and isn't magically turning into a leader for some reason. THAT'S BECAUSE OF YOU CERSEI.

Yea, the pov's really crush her as a mother. There were possible arguments prior.

[White Rose]

1: Does she love her children? Yes, without a doubt

2: Is she a good mother? That all Depends on your definition of 'good mother'.

At first glance her actions throughout the series are nothing but selfish, but I do believe that SHE thinks she is doing what is best for her children, and as a mother myself, that is all that you can do.

In the end if they love and respect her, and are happy to some measure, then she has done something right.

3: Do her children have issues? Most certainly! But, show me one person who doesn't have issues.

[The Frosted King]

1: Does she love her children? Yes, without a doubt

2: Is she a good mother? That all Depends on your definition of 'good mother'.

At first glance her actions throughout the series are nothing but selfish, but I do believe that SHE thinks she is doing what is best for her children, and as a mother myself, that is all that you can do.

In the end if they love and respect her, and are happy to some measure, then she has done something right.

3: Do her children have issues? Most certainly! But, show me one person who doesn't have issues.

No.

You do what is best for your children, without thinking about whats best for you.

Cersei NEVER makes that distinction.

And it reveals the core truth of her love for her children.

She is Tywin come again.

I'd wager if someone asked if he loved Jaime and Cersei, he'd eventually answer in the affirmative.

Cersei has always put herself before her children.

She put her enmity of Robert, over their safety.

Jaime said it best in regards to Sansa marrying an innkeep.

Cersei would never, merely because while she do love her children, her love of power is greater.

So she'll always risk a knight come aknocking, if it means power for herself.

Elia wanted to flee to save Rhaenys and Aegon.

Cersei chose not to.