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First of My Name Posted February 22, 2015 Author Share Posted February 22, 2015 Viscount Valentine's Volume 37: Everywhere, there was joy. Children shat gemstones of liquid. Meanwhile, Sauron's disintegration hurried Prime's monkey painting. Armies of dried laundry wrung over several miles. Walruses clashed over whiskey while wearing denim waistcoats, lined with white radishes. Viscount Valentine made beetroots with disregard for the environment. Trouble emerged from King Whatshiface's groin and consumed his kidneys without leaving antelopes of Westeros Christmas behind. Across deserts, happily pillaging camel-riding vikings conquered everyone's breakfast, dinner and became leviathen. Stannis transformed Viscount Valentine's beetroots, carelessly damning countless pre-cognitive antelopes. Wizards gathered ordinary minions and three-headed dragons to trade sandwiches for nickels. Just before twilight, Viscount Valentine began emailing women cabbages for president Flickerdoodle because critical arousal urged wizards to kiss dolphin noses. Loki befriended Stannis after forcing himself against dreams about gardening gurus from Lake Lucerne. Empress Shuwabadaba despised Tormund's member, but Tormund terrorized Narnia anyway. Whatshisface told Anubis to rub salt gently into everyone's wounds, particularly his aunt Queen Amidala's cheeks. Abrasive love spread exponentially across chicken brothels. Usually, chickens' brothels were replete with plump cocks withholding fun, but unlike Loki they detested chicks. Moving from abhorrently pleasant locales, Lokizia, Loki's maniacal twin sis-bro, crammed puffy decaying blood oranges into Anubis' eye sockets. Anubis wasn't amused so Viscount Valentine pretended to drink poison, so Anubis would be fooled and stop licking everyone's eyelashes. She didn't know that she lusted for chicken, but not Tormund's cock. Tormund was sexually aggrovated and soon decided that he wanted pudding crammed with decomposing gnomes, marinated generously, transforming their hats into sausages. Snakes strangeld puppies until Stannis told Mephistopheles to prevent Viscount Valentine's Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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