The Red Hand Posted June 29, 2012 Share Posted June 29, 2012 Wait, Stannis always has a serious expression and grinding his teeth right? What if hes just trying to tell jokes and hes pissed because no ones laughing? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Swordsaint Posted June 29, 2012 Share Posted June 29, 2012 Did Stannis and Tywin ever meet? I'm trying to picture how a conversation between the two would go.Probably pretty short. The Stannis & Jon show is good enough for me. I hope whatever happens Stannis stays in the North forever. Stannis + Northern men is just pure laughter. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nQthing Posted June 29, 2012 Share Posted June 29, 2012 Stannis: I hate whoresTywin: me tooStannis: great Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Swordsaint Posted June 29, 2012 Share Posted June 29, 2012 Stannis: I hate whoresTywin: me tooStannis: greatI could picture Tyrion saying the same thing with a serious face. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dawn Age Posted August 3, 2012 Share Posted August 3, 2012 What about the one where he asked his wife and her uncle if they were trained to be ravens? Seriously I can't see how people hate this guy, he has me in tears.I'd rather see Stannis talk with Tyrion then Tywin. Tywin has no humor. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RenlyIsNotRight Posted August 3, 2012 Share Posted August 3, 2012 http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rvBfBFa6gGk - @1:47, I found his little tangent about eating different types of animals completely and utterly hilarious. Not to mention "I suspect you'll be the first crabbers son to wear the badge". And Stannis ripping apart Janos Slynt in the books never gets old.As far as hypothetical humorous situations, Stannis + Dolorous Edd Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LordofWinter Posted August 6, 2012 Share Posted August 6, 2012 Stannis has the best sense of humour. It's so dry, and seemingly unintentional. He's, dare I say it, better than Edd.Take it back! You take that back now!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Patrick Durden Posted August 6, 2012 Share Posted August 6, 2012 Stannis is definitely my favorite character behind Tyrion but the best Baratheon joke belongs to Renly.Melisandre : Stannis is Azhor Azai, he who was born amidst salt and smoke.Renly : Salt and smoke....are you a ham? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Oli Posted August 20, 2012 Share Posted August 20, 2012 This one comes from the show, or at least I do not remember it being in the book:Davos: And it's four less fingernails to clean. Stannis: Fewer. Davos: Pardon? Stannis: Four fewer fingernails to clean.Might not be particularly funny, but I love it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Promised Prince Posted August 23, 2012 Share Posted August 23, 2012 Oh yeah, that was a good one, too.He's also the one, I believe, who gave Davos his Onion Knight title. :DI don't think he did, I remember him saying "..They were calling you the Onion Knight.." to Davos. Can't quite remember where, when or why though. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Ghost of Winter Posted August 23, 2012 Share Posted August 23, 2012 This one comes from the show, or at least I do not remember it being in the book:Davos: And it's four less fingernails to clean. Stannis: Fewer. Davos: Pardon? Stannis: Four fewer fingernails to clean.Might not be particularly funny, but I love it.I like his casual humor. Like he's so serious when he speaks show and book wise. Funny guy. I like this from the show.. Some guy: "we could lose hundreds" Stannis: shrugs "thousands." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
thewingedwolf Posted August 23, 2012 Share Posted August 23, 2012 Hi all,I think Stannis is the funniest character in the series, and I started this thread to compile all of Stannis's hilarious one-liners. I searched the forums, but couldn't find anything entirely devoted to Stannis's humor.My personal favorites:- "Her own father got this child on her? We are well rid of her, then. I will not suffer such abominations here. This is not King's Landing."- "Without a son of Winterfell to stand beside me, I can only hope to win the north by battle. That requires stealing a leaf from my brother's book. Not that Robert ever read one."What are you favorite Stannis quotes? I could use a laugh on this rainy day!Be careful, laughing at Stannis got my topics banned :((( Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
History of Westeros Posted October 14, 2012 Share Posted October 14, 2012 "Only Renly could vex me so with a piece of fruit." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rolex Baratheon Posted October 14, 2012 Share Posted October 14, 2012 OH GOD FINALLY THIS THREAD IS MADE. I HAVE BEEN WAITING FOR THIS THREAD. I'M SO EXCITED.I like Stannis memes and jokes, like the "The humans didn't build the Wall to protect themselves from The Others, The Others built the Wall to protect themselves from Stannis." XD Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Philip Baratheon Posted October 14, 2012 Share Posted October 14, 2012 Great thread!One to contribute that I liked, I think it's only in the TV series but still a gem:When Davos is made Stannis' Hand, it's a great scene that shows the two reminiscing about Storm's End, why they're so loyal to one another, just what Davos means to Stannis, how Davos' father was a crabber and is looked down on for this and so on. It's got all this emotional and powerful build up to the point where Stannis tells the humble onion knight "when I sit the Iron Throne, you'll be my Hand". Davos, taken aback and honoured by this gesture, falls to his knees and thanks Stannis greatly for it.To which Stannis just says, walking off, "I expect you'll be the first crabber's son to hold the office." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Magic 8 Ball Posted October 15, 2012 Share Posted October 15, 2012 "I'll need to take a page from my brother's book.... ....Not that he ever read one" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
solidsnake Posted October 15, 2012 Share Posted October 15, 2012 Stannis is definitely my second favourte character in the series. The dude is hilarious. Just a straight up bad ass. I hope to god he doesn't get killed off. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Arland Posted October 15, 2012 Share Posted October 15, 2012 The closest interaction I remember (someone correct me if I'm wrong) is Tywin saying that Stannis was the one to be worried about. That conversion would be epic!!I think this was some remark by Tywin to idea that Stannis will bend a knee or something. He dismissed it saying that Stannis will fight untlil he dies and them some...Interesting if it wasn't another moment of foreshadowing. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cuendillar Posted October 15, 2012 Share Posted October 15, 2012 Not Stannis, but I always liked this one (about Davos):"An admiral without ships, a hand without fingers, in service of a king without a throne. Is this a knight who comes before us, or the answer to a child's riddle?"Same kind of dry wit, but from a minor character this time. I could definitely see Stannis saying something much like it though. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DaveRoid Posted October 15, 2012 Share Posted October 15, 2012 "if the only all the lords in the land had but one neck" he would strike it down...... :bowdown: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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