williamjm Posted March 17, 2015 Share Posted March 17, 2015 Saw a link to this on Facebook earlier. I would say the title seems fairly self-explanatory, although I think the term 'disaster' is a bit mild for most of them, I'm not sure any words have yet been invented that could adequately describe some of those covers. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Andrew Gilfellon Posted March 17, 2015 Share Posted March 17, 2015 Why does that kid look so afraid? Did that guy just kidnap him or something? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
williamjm Posted March 18, 2015 Author Share Posted March 18, 2015 Why does that kid look so afraid? Did that guy just kidnap him or something? I think I'd be terrified too if I was in that cover. According to Amazon's summary, this is the plot: Fate drops Khit, the bicultural Thai/Scottish hero, into the Highlands of Scotland when he inherits a title and Highland castle. An evil cousin from his new life and corrupt Muay Thai boxing promoter from his old one plot to eliminate Khit and his family. With a lover, twin baby sons, and an adopted eight-year-old boy, Khit uses his brain, brawn, and extensive resources to try and outwit the villains. A hunt for a treasure of gold and the kidnapping of his son complicate the struggle to survive. I'm a bit concerned about his parenting priorities if the kidnapping of his son is taking second spot in his list of complications after a hunt for a treasure of gold. The plot summary does fail to explain why there's a sinister otter lurking behind him in the cover. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gertrude Posted March 18, 2015 Share Posted March 18, 2015 Buaaaahhhaaahhhaaaaa! That summary! The otter is his lover, of course. eta: oh my god ... what is going on in that thread? You're right in that words can't describe the mixed horror and hilarity I'm feeling right now. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Unlady B Posted March 18, 2015 Share Posted March 18, 2015 I want to believe those covers were done on the sole purpose to humiliate whoever wrote -and achieved publishing- that piece of crap (that I would totally read to laugh my ass off).Really, the first one has a very fine and thoughtful crop&paste job. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Darth Richard II Posted March 18, 2015 Share Posted March 18, 2015 Ahhh, self published e book covers. Goodreads giveaways is FILLED with that shit. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Reckoner Posted March 18, 2015 Share Posted March 18, 2015 Horse bodice rippers... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
williamjm Posted March 18, 2015 Author Share Posted March 18, 2015 I think this might be the most baffling one. I'd like to think that the cover artist was being overly literal about the title, but it may well be that the love interest is actually an anthropomorphic rainbow who is also a biker. It may seem minor compared to all the other things wrong with it, but I don't think the rainbow should be wearing sunglasses. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lyanna Stark Posted March 18, 2015 Share Posted March 18, 2015 I'm a bit concerned about his parenting priorities if the kidnapping of his son is taking second spot in his list of complications after a hunt for a treasure of gold. The plot summary does fail to explain why there's a sinister otter lurking behind him in the cover. Hmm, sounds like there should be a sheikh somewhere in there. I think this might be the most baffling one. I'd like to think that the cover artist was being overly literal about the title, but it may well be that the love interest is actually an anthropomorphic rainbow who is also a biker. It may seem minor compared to all the other things wrong with it, but I don't think the rainbow should be wearing sunglasses. :lol: I'm quote fond of the dude with the weapons glued to his forehead. I bet that's really convenient. He can headbang the bad guys to death. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
williamjm Posted March 18, 2015 Author Share Posted March 18, 2015 Hmm, sounds like there should be a sheikh somewhere in there. I guess the author has to leave something for the sequel. I'm quote fond of the dude with the weapons glued to his forehead. I bet that's really convenient. He can headbang the bad guys to death. It's a great idea, how many times in books do protagonists get inconveniently disarmed in the middle of a fight? There's no danger of that happening to him, although aiming the gun might be tricky. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jerol Posted March 18, 2015 Share Posted March 18, 2015 I saw this collection when it was posted on Metafilter - definitely made my day. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gertrude Posted March 18, 2015 Share Posted March 18, 2015 The one with the horse dropped my jaw a little. I read the summary though, and it killed the fun. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Myrddin Posted March 19, 2015 Share Posted March 19, 2015 This is what happens when you know an "artist" and need a cover for your novel. And I say this as someone growing up as an artist (even pursued it in college). People around you tell you how wonderful you draw to encourage (which is great), but some people never realize that they need to keep improving... But more importantly, Photoshop does not an artist make. :lol: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lyanna Stark Posted March 19, 2015 Share Posted March 19, 2015 And I say this as someone growing up as an artist (even pursued it in college). But did you draw any anthropomorphic biker rainbows? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Myrddin Posted March 19, 2015 Share Posted March 19, 2015 But did you draw any anthropomorphic biker rainbows? Sadly, no. If I had, it'd be framed on my mother's wall. :) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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