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How does Tommen die?

Lord Ben

By Lord Ben,
in General (ASoIaF)

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Lady Katherine Squire

Lady Katherine

Posted
Posted

Recently I have heard that Cersei is going to “corrupt” Tommen and turn him as evil as joffrey. Taking to heart this little nugget of wholly unbiased and totally believable speculation, I have composed the following cautionary tale for young children (complete with illustrations. Just click on the following links.)

Tommen’s Big Mistake: A Tale with a VERY IMPORTANT MESSAGE

Once there was an adorable, sweet, gentle little lion cub called Tommen.

http://images.pictur...aper-154827.jpg

His chubbinesss and his “aw, shucks” adorableness endeared him to readers everywhere

http://www.sa-venues...ion-cub-pic.jpg

He loves spending his days in the following fashion:

http://images.teamsu...2008/cubcat.jpg

Unfortunately, Tommen’s mother wasn’t a very good role model.

http://www.maxwaugh....n082210sa22.jpg

http://media-cdn.pin..._WMUCSVTn_c.jpg

One day, Tommen went to have lunch with his mother.

http://i.telegraph.c...cub_998573i.jpg

When he came back, he was never the same again.

http://www.123rf.com...fresh-kill.html

The End

PS, I laughed for a good 5 minutes. Esp the bloody "Cersei" pictures. Bahahaha. I'm a crazy cat lady (see the Ser Pounce, Lady Whiskers, and Boots comment above)

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THE INDIGO Squire

THE INDIGO

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It is known that over protective mothers subcutaneously want to kill their kids. There are cases that mothers with kill their child and them self so no one can come betwwen them or because they "fear" for the child's saftey.

If Cersei is crazy and paranoid enough she will kill him. Remember in ACOK she was will to off her head and Sansa's head just encase..

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Raksha the Demon Council Member

Raksha the Demon

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It is known that over protective mothers subcutaneously want to kill their kids. There are cases that mothers with kill their child and them self so no one can come betwwen them or because they "fear" for the child's saftey.

If Cersei is crazy and paranoid enough she will kill him. Remember in ACOK she was will to off her head and Sansa's head just encase..

Considering that Tommen is probably quite high up on the hit list of Jon Connington, young Aegon, Stannis & Melisandre, Arianne and the Sand Snakes (especially if Myrcella remains betrothed to Trystane), possibly Tyrion and Daenerys as well, Cersei would be justified in her paranoia for Tommen. I could see Littlefinger engineering the kid's demise if he saw a good reason to do it. That's not even including the Tyrells if Margaery is executed by the Faith or if Olenna decides to double-cross Cersei and offer the ever-maidenly Margaery to Aegon over Tommen's dead body.

Poor Tommen and Myrcella...

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Queen Cersei I Council Member

Queen Cersei I

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It is known that over protective mothers subcutaneously want to kill their kids.

Wow. This is by far the best comment I've heard from you since the whole, "Shae is a dirty whore who got more than she deserved" thing.

Anyway, you are right that she will surely end up murdering Tommen, because she has to do so in order for GRRM to prove that defying the patriarchy erm I mean choosing the father of one's own children after your husband rapes you I mean erm, evil never pays.

He's already proved there is no questioning Cersei's decision to have her brother's children under the "hey, is it really all that bad if the kids turn out well-- and perhaps the weak, drunken King Bob's kids would have turned out pathetic alchoholics like their old man," by making Cersei and Jaime's eldest son the most ridiculously one dimensional child sociopath in all of literature, and showing the weak, drunken, all around addict king bob's offspring as a bunch of kind, intelligent, moral paragons who somehow inherited every virtue of their father's times 20 and not a single one of his glaring vices.

Now he has to further illustrate Cersei's folly by having her murder her remaining family, (bye bye, Lancel!), directly cause the death of poor Myrcella and, I suspect, in the final book, murder Tommen with her own two hands. And then Robert's bastards can inherit storms end, because the seed is strong and the patriarchy always triumphs in the end.

Also... we have to have Jaime righteously, slowly strangling Cersei, and that might not happen unless we have Cersei brutally murdering Tommen a few minutes before. Just sayin.

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Castel Council Member

Castel

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Wow. This is by far the best comment I've heard from you since the whole, "Shae is a dirty whore who got more than she deserved" thing.

Anyway, you are right that she will surely end up murdering Tommen, because she has to do so in order for GRRM to prove that defying the patriarchy erm I mean choosing the father of one's own children after your husband rapes you I mean erm, evil never pays.

He's already proved there is no questioning Cersei's decision to have her brother's children under the "hey, is it really all that bad if the kids turn out well-- and perhaps the weak, drunken King Bob's kids would have turned out pathetic alchoholics like their old man," by making Cersei and Jaime's eldest son the most ridiculously one dimensional child sociopath in all of literature, and showing the weak, drunken, all around addict king bob's offspring as a bunch of kind, intelligent, moral paragons who somehow inherited every virtue of their father's times 20 and not a single one of his glaring vices.

Now he has to further illustrate Cersei's folly by having her murder her remaining family, (bye bye, Lancel!), directly cause the death of poor Myrcella and, I suspect, in the final book, murder Tommen with her own two hands. And then Robert's bastards can inherit storms end, because the seed is strong and the patriarchy always triumphs in the end.

Also... we have to have Jaime righteously, slowly strangling Cersei, and that might not happen unless we have Cersei brutally murdering Tommen a few minutes before. Just sayin.

:eek:

I can't tell if you're being sarcastic...

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The Lost Lord Council Member

The Lost Lord

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Now he has to further illustrate Cersei's folly by having her murder her remaining family, (bye bye, Lancel!), directly cause the death of poor Myrcella and, I suspect, in the final book, murder Tommen with her own two hands. And then Robert's bastards can inherit storms end, because the seed is strong and the patriarchy always triumphs in the end. Also... we have to have Jaime righteously, slowly strangling Cersei, and that might not happen unless we have Cersei brutally murdering Tommen a few minutes before. Just sayin.

That's certainly a worst-case "GRRM sux" scenario. But I think instead, Connington will have Tommen and Myrcella killed when he takes the city. And Tyrion will eventually strangle Cersei and it will be screwed up and depressing and a sign of Tyrion's own moral descent into total villainy, because GRRM has almost never allowed a moment of purely cathartic satisfaction of vengeance (not even when Joffrey died).

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Grip Council Member

Grip

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Why does everyone hate on Tommen, he's pretty nice for a Lannister...

Yeah I know I was just kidding, he is a nice kid in all. Its just that..I like beets and he wanted to outlaw them..Its not right, thats all really..

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Dr. Pepper Council Member

Dr. Pepper

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If Cersei doesn't act as stupidly and erratically after Kevan's murder as Varys says she will, I could see Varys or his little birds doing the deed.

I could also see the Iron Bank being involved in Tommen's death in some way. The banks only interest is in recouping their loan to the Iron Throne. At this point, the best shot they have with this is through Stannis and so they have every reason to work to ensure Stannis makes it to the throne. Eliminating Tommen would break up the Lannister/Tyrell alliance and help create a Baratheon/Tyrell alliance by betrothing Shireen to Willas.

But it's just as likely that Cersei directly or indirectly kill Tommen.

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Winter's Knight Council Member

Winter's Knight

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ok what i think will happen:

Myrcella will die in dorne, or on her way home. i dunno how. This will make cersei go mad, she kills tommen, and realizes what she did just before jamie comes in, sees her over his body, and kills her.

Why? I see this hypothesis a lot but, Jaime just doesn't care for his children-I can't see him being enraged enough to strangle Cersei over it.

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