The absolute worst theory you have heard?

[Joyful Union]

Daenarys will be a capable Queen when she arrives in Westeros.

Stannis is a truly enlightened man.

[Eating My Wings]

Ned raped Lyanna.

[Golden Lion]

The entire story is taking place inside the eye of a giant named m'cumber.

[Nite's King]

Quick, someone give me 5 letters and ill make 3 theories.

[Nite's King]

Ok I'll do it: gnhlt

Gendry is AAR/TPTWP

Ned was a secret targaryen

Howland + Lyanna = Tyrion

[The Meeraculous Third Reed]

Anyone who is clearly dead is alive.

Much of Great One bingo.

Any of the Lannister children are Targaryens.

[Pinkie Baelish]

The amazing Jon Snow is the amazing solution to every problem in the books, and every other character we have followed is completely tangential to his amazing storyline because he's the amazing song of ice and fire as he's the son of the perfectly amazing Rhaegar and Lyanna.

Did I mention he was amazing?

(before this turns into a flame war, I'm not complaining about R+L=J, but rather its perceived importance among the general fanbase)

Oh my god, this.

This isn't much of a theory, but I've heard people state the hilarious idea that Bran's pre-ADWD chapters were actually fun to read.

[butterbumps!]

Much of Great One bingo.

Is it too late for me to add "Great One" to the list of terrible, woefully unsupported theories?

[The Meeraculous Third Reed]

Is it too late for me to add "Great One" to the list of terrible, woefully unsupported theories?

Yes.

[SeanF]

LF rode to Winterfell while Ned was absent, drugged Catelyn, raped her, and she gave birth to Sansa.

Robb would have secured the loyalty of his Bannermen had he executed Catelyn after she released Jaime.

Missandei is the Harpy.

Coldhands is Rhaegar.

Quentyn Martell is alive, as at the end of ADWD.

Daenerys resembles Jesus Christ.

Catelyn is the worst mother in Westeros.

[Grip]

One of the "minor" or less well known theories that I dislike, hate being perhaps too strong a word, is one that said that Oswell Whent was still alive and "acting" as Osmund Kettleblack! I "hate" these kind of theories the most, IE like the one's saying that Edd is not dead but just "acting" as someone else or that he was somehow rescued before his execution and then someone else took his place etc. I think the ones with Rhaegar and Edd being the most popular..

[Sir Noone Sword Of The Day]

any theories that are just ridiculous i just assume are people trolling i can't even comprehend how some people would get such ideas into their heads. But a theory i don't like is that Euron is being controlled by his warlocks, and that jon or bran will defeat the great other 'PHYSICALLY' like an actual battle which i think is stupid and if GRRM did shape the story into that kind of a finish it would be bad writing in my opinion. Thankfully i have faith in GRRM writing ability like so many others that he won't do this.

[Starfell]

Tywin knows where Tysha went. Seriously, why would he? She's beneath his notice, hence the dismissive answer

[RedBean]

Aerys+Joanna=Jaime+Cersei

Aerys+Joanna=Tyrion

Stannis ends up on the Iron Throne (or Dany and Jon for that matter)

Ned+Lyanna=Jon

[TalalOfDorne]

Ned killed Lyanna in the ToJ

[MagnusPrime]

LF rode to Winterfell while Ned was absent, drugged Catelyn, raped her, and she gave birth to Sansa.

Missandei is the Harpy.

Quentyn Martell is alive, as at the end of ADWD......

I never knew these three theories were out there to be read. although I knew that some were saying that Missandei would be one of the three Betrayals Dany has to experience.

But how anyone could think that littlefinger could travel all the way North and rape Catelyn without getting killed is beyond me.

So Dragonfire is the newest skin peel spa treatment is it?

[Maxpey]

That Ashara Dayne is Quaithe

[SeanF]

I never knew these three theories were out there to be read. although I knew that some were saying that Missandei would be one of the three Betrayals Dany has to experience.

But how anyone could think that littlefinger could travel all the way North and rape Catelyn without getting killed is beyond me.

So Dragonfire is the newest skin peel spa treatment is it?

I think these theories only have a select following.

[Chaircat Meow]

There are too many terrible ones to choose from. I wouldn't know where to begin.

Currently this one is taking the cake;

http://asoiaf.westeros.org/index.php/topic/87509-did-mel-swap-jon/

[thecryptile]

There are too many terrible ones to choose from. I wouldn't know where to begin.

Currently this one is taking the cake;

http://asoiaf.wester...d-mel-swap-jon/

Yeah, I'm with Bran on that, terrible theory with no textual basis! Still not as bad as Ned+Lynna=Jon, which is the all time worst, and was started as trolling.