Battlefinger Posted September 21, 2014 Share Posted September 21, 2014 To Robert Baratheon: The long night 2.0 is imminent and the North needs as many Starks as are available. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SerTonyStark Posted September 21, 2014 Share Posted September 21, 2014 To Robb Stark before heading to the Twins. "It's a trap!"To Imry Florent before sailing to King's Landing without scouting. "It's a trap!"To Ned when he send Baelish to get the Gold Cloaks to his side. "It's a trap!"To Tyrion before going to Joff's wedding. "It's a trap!"To Robert before going on his last hunt. "It's a trap!"To Daario at the start of WoW. "You should try and gain Daenerys' favor by killing the Iron Captain in single combat." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SerTonyStark Posted September 21, 2014 Share Posted September 21, 2014 Truly love this. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SerTonyStark Posted September 21, 2014 Share Posted September 21, 2014 To Ned: you must kill Jaime Lannister on the Iron a Throne and take it for yourself. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sullen Posted September 21, 2014 Share Posted September 21, 2014 Theon: Raze Winterfell and bring your hostages back to the Isles, you'll be all the better for it.Renly: To hell with honour, strike at Stannis before the agreed time of battle.Eddard: Listen to Renly, he is right.Daenerys: Your drive is admirable, but you're aiming too high. You won't end slavery, make it to Westeros while you still can.Victarion: Listen to Asha, she's right, or at least compromise with her... you can still share power without making her your "official" Hand.Asha: If things go awry, support Victarion, united you stand a better chance against Euron.Balon: Do not crown yourself. Attack the rebellious North, but do so in the name of the Iron Throne, you need both a realistic goal, and allies, crowning yourself robs you of at least one. (Most likely both) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Balerion the one eared cat Posted September 21, 2014 Share Posted September 21, 2014 (up to ADWD spoilers)To Tyrion, at the very beginning: Tysha isn't a whore, go and find her and then gtfo of Westeros! Or when he meets Shae... she IS a lying whore, kill her then find Tysha and gtfo of Westeros! To Dany, probably about the time when she leaves Quarth: Jorah is informing on you, but he really, really really loves you and you need his advice, so forgive him; also, trying to abolish slavery in Essos isn't going to end well for you; if you've got to try, stay in Astapor and go from there. Or, yno, just go to Westeros already.To Jon, when he gets to the Wall: your parents are Lyanna and Rhaegar, and yours is the song of Ice and Fire.To Robb: DO NOT GO ANYWHERE NEAR THAT WEDDING!!! ETA: to EVERYONE in Westeros... The Starks are right, for crying out loud - Winter Is Coming, you should really be doing something to prepare for that! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DragonWolfRose Posted September 21, 2014 Share Posted September 21, 2014 Robb Stark: Be mindful of Roose Bolton. While he may be an experienced leader, he should still be approached with caution. Listen to your mother, don’t seek any bargain with Lord Walder Frey. Daenerys: Please, don’t pay attention to half of the things your brother says, especially about “waking the dragon” and whatnot. And this one may break your heart, but Ser Jorah isn’t the man you think he is. Sansa Stark: Even though the thought of someday becoming a queen is inviting, please listen to your father and leave Joffrey alone. Trust me, it won’t end well for you or your family. And don’t visit Cersei behind your father’s back - bad idea. Renly Baratheon: Stannis will be your undoing. Perhaps, it’s best to leave the war and put the idea of kingship behind you. Tywin Lannister: You’ll get what is finally deserved. (But then again, it happened perfectly on its own. So no…I won’t tell him anything.) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Minstral Posted September 21, 2014 Share Posted September 21, 2014 To Robert So what does it say? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JonCon's Red Beard Posted September 21, 2014 Share Posted September 21, 2014 So what does it say? Todos tus (all of your) hi_os son del Matarreyes (are The Kingslayer's) HiLos? (yarns?) HiGos? (figs?) no lo pillo (don't get it). It's hiJos (children). Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lord of Nutella Posted September 21, 2014 Share Posted September 21, 2014 To Robb: Declare for Stannis, that is what ur father had done as he is the rightful king and allying with him is going to allow you to fuck the Lannisters. To Ned: The derserter is right, the Others are back!To Dany: Marry Quentyn and get the FUCK OUT OF MEREEN!Arya: You are not noone. Go to Jon, try to recover a home, and live your life.LF: you are a fucking whoreson; just stick a dagger into yourself pls. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JoeyBanana Posted September 21, 2014 Share Posted September 21, 2014 Robert Baratheon: Do NOT stop the Cleganes. Let them fight. Willas Tyrell and Howland Reed: Go meet a POV already. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cthulhu the Drowned God Posted September 21, 2014 Share Posted September 21, 2014 They'll believe me without question, no matter how implausible what I say would be otherwise? All right then, I'll tell Mace Tyrell it's in his best interest to support Stannis. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Poppa Chase Posted September 21, 2014 Share Posted September 21, 2014 To Rhaegar in his youth: The dragon must have three heads. It is time you become a warrior.To Edmure Tully before Stone mill:Do not defend. Allow them to retreat west. Alienate the lannisters from Kings LandingTo Robb Stark before heading in to the Crag:Do not go to the Crag, Head to the Twins, and marry Fair Walda or Roslin, whilst Mustering your forces with Howland Reed, and preparing to take back Moat Cailin and Winterfell. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JonCon's Red Beard Posted September 21, 2014 Share Posted September 21, 2014 Y U KNOW NOTHING, JON SNOW (ノಠ益ಠ)ノ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Poppa Chase Posted September 21, 2014 Share Posted September 21, 2014 To Renly before his meeting with Stannis: Become your brothers heir, and stab him in the back later.To Baelish whilst picking him up after his fight with Brandon Stark:Cause chaos my friend, Make Westeros remember the mocking birdTo NW deserter:You're going the wrong way! To castle Black with you!To Eddard Stark before sending men after Clegane:Send the Knight of Flowers to lead the kings justiceTo Bowen Marsh: Kill yourself Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JoeyBanana Posted September 21, 2014 Share Posted September 21, 2014 I'm surprised nobody has used this precious opportunity to pitch a whole list of member jokes to Tormund yet. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
unitron Posted September 22, 2014 Share Posted September 22, 2014 To Ned: "Don't worry about how Jon Arryn died, when Robert 'offers' you the job of Hand, kill him, make it look like an accident, and immediately swear fealty to Joffrey*, stay at Winterfell, and don't believe your wife's sister, she's turned into a nutjob, and always trust the kids' direwolves' instincts. *Cersei will be happy, Tywin will probably be made Hand and he'll be happy, and you'll have them out of your hair. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LordStoneheart Posted September 22, 2014 Share Posted September 22, 2014 To Lady Stoneheart after her revival: "To you I pledge my faith. I shall never fail you. I swear it by earth and water. I swear it by bronze and iron. I swear it by ice and fire." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Victarion Chainbreaker Posted September 22, 2014 Share Posted September 22, 2014 To Gendry: "Damn, that Bella chick is hot, you should definitely tap that!" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Evo Posted September 22, 2014 Share Posted September 22, 2014 To Oberyn before Gregor fight: "Stay out of arms reach!" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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