How could Theon have maximised his Street Cred on the Iron Islands?

[Craving Peaches]

1. Show up naked (I did not come up with this idea).
2. Not hit on his sister.
3. After taking Winterfell, take Bran and Rickon hostage, burn the place and go back to the Islands.
4. ???

In all seriousness though I think his father was looking for any excuse to complain about him because he couldn't accept that it was his failure which lead to Theon being taken away and so rather than accepting it is his fault he just blames Theon.

[King_Tristifer_IV_Mudd]

Theon was fucked from the get go. Barring a miraculous and great victory, like taking White Harbor, he’d be a laughing stock

[Hugorfonics]

3 hours ago, Craving Peaches said:

1. Show up naked (I did not come up with this idea).
2. Not hit on his sister.
3. After taking Winterfell, take Bran and Rickon hostage, burn the place and go back to the Islands.
4. ???

In all seriousness though I think his father was looking for any excuse to complain about him because he couldn't accept that it was his failure which lead to Theon being taken away and so rather than accepting it is his fault he just blames Theon.

1. Don't show up with fake medals of honor, no doubt. But I agree that wouldn't have moved Balon to a hug.

2. I don't think Balon knew about that. That was just Asha sizing up her brother. Hardly any conversation fit for a father's ear.

3. Yeah, I mean why not. He'd certainly get the heroes welcome on his way home, this would certainly boost his street cred, idk about maximizing it though. 

Theon wanted to be a hero, he also wanted to be a Stark along with a great fighter and lover but he needed to be his fathers heir. The max is the Seastone, or the acknowledgement that it'll be his.

He assumed it would be, like the fate of a kingdom just boils down to assumptions, even if practicality was staring them in the face. But Balons not practical, so it's obvious he'd care little for succession protocol, let alone the greenland version.

Yea I don't think Balon or Asha had any whim of a thought to handing the Seastone to Theon, even if he was draped in victory if he retired early. I think the only chance Theon had for a title was the acquisition of Winterfell and perhaps in time the conquest of Ashas Iron Islands. The funny part of course is this childlike squabbling and convulted plots that only an adolescent can think of will ultimately fall short to the adults in the room, or as Euron would have it, outside of the room

Edited June 12, 2023 by Hugorfonics

[astarkchoice]

5 hours ago, Craving Peaches said:

1. Show up naked (I did not come up with this idea).
2. Not hit on his sister.
3. After taking Winterfell, take Bran and Rickon hostage, burn the place and go back to the Islands.
4. ???

In all seriousness though I think his father was looking for any excuse to complain about him because he couldn't accept that it was his failure which lead to Theon being taken away and so rather than accepting it is his fault he just blames Theon.

Maybe paid attention to the maester at winterfell about his own culture!.shown up in basic clothes 

Practiced with throwing axes (finger dance) rather than bow and arrow

Ensured he could still read the stars and tie knots in ropes , swam insane amounts  instead of hunting. Maybe begged to go white harbour from time to time or eastwatch by the sea to ensure he still talked to sailors or even got on a boat etc so he didnt lose the feel for the sea.

Then turned up and not announced who he was , made up an identity and reason to go to the greyjoys castle and spoke to then commomn islanders and asked questions . When he met damphir asked about everyone and asked to be drowned  etc..maybe even borrowed some commonn clothes.

Get down into the practice  yard and earned some respect.....if asha mocked him learn to give it right back and ask her to spar if she wishes to be treated as a man to humble her.

When balon presented his plan mocked it openly on its merits in front of the captains and told them why he felt westerlands was better....how hed seen robb smash the westerlands forces and how they were wide open and mocked the poverty of the northern places they planned to hit "iv seen so and so personaly they have nothing but dirt and pinecones etc have u seen their home sister? ..i have" etc

Edited June 12, 2023 by astarkchoice

[astarkchoice]

5 hours ago, King_Tristifer_IV_Mudd said:

Theon was fucked from the get go. Barring a miraculous and great victory, like taking White Harbor, he’d be a laughing stock

Fhe problem is he actualy got one...bigger than white harbour in winterfell 

And he messed  it up!!

[James Arryn]

I have almost no sympathy for Theon as a character, but there’s no doubt he was fucked by circumstances beyond his control and after that he was bound to be despised no matter what he did. If he’d betrayed his own house for the Starks, the Starks and Northerners would have branded him a turncoat that way too. Balon’s the one to blame, or I guess Robb (but I have a hard time blaming anyone for not knowing just how stupid Balon Greyjoy could be)…not Theon. He was running on black ice from the moment he stepped back on Pyke. And once he’d made the only choice Westeros accepts…the house you’re born into…suggestions he should have half-assed it is imo just Stark fandom taken to an extreme. 

Edited June 12, 2023 by James Arryn

[csuszka1948]

11 hours ago, Craving Peaches said:

1. After taking Winterfell, take Bran and Rickon hostage, burn the place and go back to the Islands

 

Honestly, this might have been enough to earn respect of most Ironborn. 

Taking Jojen and Meera hostage prevents (or at least holds back) the crannogmen from attacking Moat Cailin and taking Bran and Rickon hostage allows the Ironborn to either negotiate with Robb and take territories from the North (as Asha wanted) or use them as negotiation pieces against the Iron Throne (threatening with their release once Robb is dead if independence is not guaranteed).

The only issue is that Balon might still do something stupid, like chopping the heads of the Starks off (two sons for his three dead sons).

I think that upon Balon's death and Euron sailing in, Aeron, Asha and Victarion would all unite behind Theon as a compromise candidate and Euron would have a very difficult task to convince the Ironborn to back him (even though Theon is an asshole).

 

[The Duck and the Field]

Taking Bran and Rickon hostage would have been a pretty great victory for him. Frankly, he should have just taken them back to the Iron Islands instead of trying to hold Winterfell with like 40 guys like a dumbass. Would've been an enormous blow to the North.

[Otatop1000]

I really like the idea of reconnoitering the  Iron Islands as an incognito commoner.  As well as being prepared for the skills he would need as @astarkchoice suggested.  It would have showed the kind of cunning Asha has.

Honestly though, even just dipping back to the Robb and Co. The minute it was apparent that the situation wasn’t going to work out.  They have already set him aside as if he were a Stark.  Life was better for him in Robb’s shadow.  Sure he’d die at the Red Wedding, but it would have been better than ending up Reek.

[Castellan]

He'd have to jump on the first person to show him any disrespect and beat them to a pulp, as long as they are not so small it would be clearly a one-sided fight. But he doesn't seem to be built like a thug or raised like one, so no hope for him.

Also don't come as an emissary from the house who held you as a hostage.

 

[KingStoneheart]

It was a lose-lose situation for Theon regardless to be honest with you. Had he just burned Winterfell to the ground and taken the boys hostage, he'd probably be called a craven for leaving one of the strongest castles in the North but it is the much better alternative to what happened to him and would have at least increased his reputation and deeds that bit higher.

An endgame goal of trying to claim Bear Island would have been good for him (once he had gained that reputation from taking Winterfell, a few Iron Islanders might want to follow him there)

[Lady_Qohor]

The irony is that Theon, unlike most Ironborn his age, has actually been in real battles fighting real knights, not just bullying unarmed peasants and fishermen.

He just needs to steal some stuff from knights killed in Robb's battles. Hell, why not show up wearing Jaime Lannister's armour and claiming that he was the one who captured Kingslayer - something not even his father can boast to. Don't tell me that Theon is above lying.

[csuszka1948]

7 hours ago, KingStoneheart said:

It was a lose-lose situation for Theon regardless to be honest with you. Had he just burned Winterfell to the ground and taken the boys hostage, he'd probably be called a craven for leaving one of the strongest castles in the North but it is the much better alternative to what happened to him and would have at least increased his reputation and deeds that bit higher.

 

Nobody would call him craven. People would say he has taken the iron price and paid back his captors in kind.

[csuszka1948]

15 hours ago, Otatop1000 said:

Honestly though, even just dipping back to the Robb and Co. The minute it was apparent that the situation wasn’t going to work out.  They have already set him aside as if he were a Stark.  Life was better for him in Robb’s shadow.  Sure he’d die at the Red Wedding, but it would have been better than ending up Reek.

 

Or he would be executed as a hostage in reitaliation for Balon's attack on the North?

Yes, I don't think Robb would allow this, but the Northern lords would insist on at the very least keeping him hostage and/our under constant observation.

[Corvo the Crow]

On 6/12/2023 at 3:28 PM, Craving Peaches said:

1. Show up naked (I did not come up with this idea).
2. Not hit on his sister.
3. After taking Winterfell, take Bran and Rickon hostage, burn the place and go back to the Islands.
4. ???

In all seriousness though I think his father was looking for any excuse to complain about him because he couldn't accept that it was his failure which lead to Theon being taken away and so rather than accepting it is his fault he just blames Theon.

Showing up naked would've helped as he didn't pay the iron price. Or he could've used pelts etc. from the wildlings he killed saving Bran or armor from Lannisters.

Definitely shouldn't have hit her, instead since he doesn't know she is his sister he should've taken her then and there, true Ironborn way. After her identity is revealed, he can claim himself above gods or whatever, seems to work for some families.

Taking them as hostages would skyrocket it.