S John Posted June 29, 2007 Share Posted June 29, 2007 Guts is like one of those games / videos that your friends sent you that were popular a few years ago. The ones where, when you weren't expecting it, something would pop up on the screen and scare the shit out of you. Once somebody gets you, you've gotta get someone else to do it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Real Will Posted June 29, 2007 Share Posted June 29, 2007 ...the author clearly hasn't figured out that 'less-is-more' when it comes to dialect It's the guy wrote Trainspotting. Have you ever even leafed through that book? It is 100% phonetic Scotish spelling. This really is rather less for him. I take your point, but the guy is Scotish and I think he wants to revel in the accent. and the word choice left much to be desired ('corrugation' instead of 'fold' or... anything else?). See, but this is what I mean. He could have choosen fold, but it would have both been less effective and less creative. It seems from your italics that the word "corrugation" really got to you. If he chooses his words this effectively in scenes which aren't intended to make you heave, I think he probably does ok. And I didn't even bother looking over that 'guts' story. I'm not the brightest monkey in the jungle but I'm not stupid. You maybe onto something here. "While on his 2003 tour to promote his novel Diary, Palahniuk read to his audiences a short story titled "Guts", a tale of accidents involving masturbation, which appears in his book Haunted. It was reported that more than 73 people fainted while listening to the readings (although it is possible that many of these incidents were staged by Palahniuk's fans for humorous effect)." I remember this when it was happening. I'm not sure how genuine a lot of it was, but from some of the reports it seems that the first few, at least, were not set up. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mad Monkey Posted June 29, 2007 Share Posted June 29, 2007 If he chooses his words this effectively in scenes which aren't intended to make you heave, I think he probably does ok. I see your point then. Don't get me wrong, the scene was definitely effective if the intention was to make me want to vomit. I take your point, but the guy is Scotish and I think he wants to revel in the accent. Oh, okay then. I'm not a native speaker of English so I'm especially sensitive to heavy dialect usage. Like, in Mary's dialog from Wolf Maid's quote, it took me several minutes to understand what she was talking about. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tears of Lys Posted June 29, 2007 Share Posted June 29, 2007 Well, in my most recent book read, "Maia," there's a scene involving a slave girl and a grossly obese Lord Councillor. She, basically, has to rub his stomach so as to distend it so he can gorge more, then she has to bring the privy pot to him so he can purge. That's all I got. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jerol Posted June 29, 2007 Share Posted June 29, 2007 My god, you are all a bunch of seriously sick bastards! This is most entertaining. Worst thing I ever saw in slash was a couple pairings in the Malfoy house, seems that neither one of Draco's parents could resist banging the the little bugger. My wife claims to have seen an epic pairing Legolas with Lurtz. Now that is truly sick and wrong. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
duchess of malfi Posted June 29, 2007 Share Posted June 29, 2007 Well, in my most recent book read, "Maia," there's a scene involving a slave girl and a grossly obese Lord Councillor. She, basically, has to rub his stomach so as to distend it so he can gorge more, then she has to bring the privy pot to him so he can purge. That's all I got. I hate that book. Well, I hate everything by that author other than Watership Down. What a contrast in those two books - from bunnies making a home to a teen aged sex slave servicing the human version of Jabba the Hutt in graphic detail. I'm with the Monkey. I am also afraid to read that thing by Palahniuk. Some of the weird sex scenes people have posted lately are pretty funny, like the one in the other thread with the guy with the forked tongue and the two prehensile dueling penises. But from other peoples' reactions, I do not think I can deal with the Palahniuk. Wasn't there a book out a few years ago that was infamous for its bad sex scenes? I cannot remember the title or the author, but it is usually referred to as the Venom Cock. I never read it - is it as bad as it is reputed to be? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tears of Lys Posted June 30, 2007 Share Posted June 30, 2007 How could two "Michiganders" think so differently?! I actually thought I'd toss it aside after the first couple of chapters, but then remembered I almost tossed "Game of Thrones" after the first chapter too. Unfortunately, that feeling continued (in Maia) for quite a few chapters after that, but suddenly it became a lot more interesting around a third of the way through. I've got a lot of perseverance when it comes to reading. And I had gotten it free! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
EHK for Darwin Posted June 30, 2007 Share Posted June 30, 2007 Arggg, I don´t know what you are thinking. I can´t remember that particular sentence because i read the books in danish. But it is a great book. Much better than the films, I would say, evn though I fell asleep during the films, and have never finished any of them. Completely absurd. The novel was amatuerish pulp. Complete drivel. With prose and description that's a step above lazy fanfic. That it was made into such a brilliant film is a minor miracle. It was marginally readable and I never bothered to finish it, despite being an INSANE fan of the films. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Wolf Maid Posted July 2, 2007 Author Share Posted July 2, 2007 Some of the weird sex scenes people have posted lately are pretty funny, like the one in the other thread with the guy with the forked tongue and the two prehensile dueling penises. Wasn't there a book out a few years ago that was infamous for its bad sex scenes? I cannot remember the title or the author, but it is usually referred to as the Venom Cock. I never read it - is it as bad as it is reputed to be? I was the one who posted that one. That was Beatrice Small's work. As for the Venom cock thing, the book is called Touched by Venom by Janine Cross. I haven't read the whole of it, but I think X-ray knows something about this book. The venom cock line made it an internet legend of sorts. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Piper Posted July 2, 2007 Share Posted July 2, 2007 I'm with the Monkey. I am also afraid to read that thing by Palahniuk. Dear God, I wish I was that smart. You click on a link, knowing it's gonna gross you out. You gather yourself, you think, "I'm prepared, how bad could it be." Oh, it's bad. Real bad. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Wolf Maid Posted July 2, 2007 Author Share Posted July 2, 2007 You know it's bad the moment you read carrots and...the other things. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Piper Posted July 2, 2007 Share Posted July 2, 2007 You know it's bad the moment you read carrots and...the other things. The carrots I could handle, but the, arg, I can't even say it, that wouldn't be fair to those who havae wisely avoided clicking. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dunhallym Posted July 2, 2007 Share Posted July 2, 2007 I'm sorry guys, but this is pitiful. Try reading anything by De Sade. I would quote some of his stuff, but whereas the passages here are at least somewhat amusing in their child-like effort to be obscene, the Marquis' work approaches genuinely disturbing. Read 120 Days of Sodom and nothing will ever come close to it. Bah, once you know the word "sadist" comes from him... he invented a style... I have to confirm his books are truely awful. I've read one of his books some time ago. I only managed to go through the end of it thanks to my physics lesson. I hated physics and had to go through 2 years of courses for a big exam. Each time I wanted to stop studying, I read 1 or 2 pages from Sade. After that, physics looked a wonderful topic... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MinDonner Posted July 2, 2007 Share Posted July 2, 2007 Oh God Damn. I really really wish I hadn't just read that Guts story. That's not a good way to start the week. :sick: I can see what they mean about the fainting, though. Not from the grossness, but because at the start he says "take a deep breath and hold it" and then lots of the anecdotes involve partial stranglings/drownings and you find yourself trying to hold your breath in sympathy; I'm still feeling a bit light-headed now... Don't read it, though. It's nasty. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Waterdancer Posted July 2, 2007 Share Posted July 2, 2007 I had carrots with my lunch today. I feel queasy. As for my ickiest quote, here's a scene from Equus: The King rides out on Equus, mightiest of horses. . . .His neck comes out of my body. It lifts in the dark. Equus, my Godslave! . . . Now the King commands you. Tonight, we ride against them all. [He whips Nugget] And Equus the Mighty rose against all! His enemies scatter, his enemies fall! . . . My mane, stiff in the wind! My flanks! My hooves! Mane on my legs, on my flanks, like whips! Raw! Raw I’m raw! Raw! Feel me on you! On you! On you! On you! I want to be in you! I want to BE you forever and ever! -- Equns, I love you! Now! -- Bear me away! Make us One Person! [He rides Equus frantically.] One Person! One Person! One Person! One Person! [He rises up on the horse’s back, and calls like a trumpet.] Ha-Ha! .. . Ha-HA! ... Ha-HA! [The trumpet turns to great cries.] HA-HA! HA-HA! HA-HA! HA-HAH! HA! HA. . . HAAAAA! [He twists like a flame. Silence . . . Slowly, the boy drops off th horse’s back . .] AMEN! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Piper Posted July 2, 2007 Share Posted July 2, 2007 I had carrots with my lunch today. I feel queasy. I saw a pool on the news today while eating dinner. I promptly lost my appetite. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Wolf Maid Posted July 3, 2007 Author Share Posted July 3, 2007 We'll never look at carrots and pools the same way again. Oh, God, Equus! Is that the one where Daniel Radcliffe was is in the buff for? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
angie Posted July 3, 2007 Share Posted July 3, 2007 Dear God, I wish I was that smart. You click on a link, knowing it's gonna gross you out. You gather yourself, you think, "I'm prepared, how bad could it be." Oh, it's bad. Real bad. I read it (or at least an excerpt) somewhere awhile back. Once I knew for sure it was the same story I decided not to finish reading it a second time. :sick: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Piper Posted July 3, 2007 Share Posted July 3, 2007 I read it (or at least an excerpt) somewhere awhile back. Once I knew for sure it was the same story I decided not to finish reading it a second time. :sick: Heh, I'm guessing that's a hard one to confuse with another story. I'll see your :sick: and raise you a Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
angie Posted July 3, 2007 Share Posted July 3, 2007 it is. The first parts sounded sort of familiar. I closed out once I realized we were indeed heading towards the pool. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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