Cockblocking

[Myshkin]

Bingo.

[Jacen]

:rofl:

Brady, you complete me.

[Zoë Sumra]

[quote name='Raidne' post='1702862' date='Feb 27 2009, 23.48']Eloisa, I'm pretty much with you except you come off as though if a female boarder had written an account of her quest for meaningless cock without regard to said cock's owner's feelings or mutual desires you'd write it off as a story of female empowerment.

I will say that I certainly think people should have sex with the whole person, and not just with their relevant body parts, but I can't say I've never talked about guys like some of the posts in this thread have discussed women. [b]It's not pretty, and I shouldn't have done that, but I was always joking around. [/b][/quote]
Such was not my intention. To expand: If a woman is looking for cock and a man is looking for cunt, best for all concerned that they actually ascertain that that is what the other wants, rather than completely ignoring the other person's possible wishes for the (however brief) relationship, or ignoring that the other person has desires at all.

The part I bolded - the place where this conversation about objectivisation gains a double standard is where you realise it ain't always a pretty thing to do. Certain posts in this thread by male boarders give the impression that not only is it just fine to do so, it's a god-given right.

[quote name='scrahan' post='1702879' date='Feb 28 2009, 00.09']I just re-read the opening, and I'm trying to see where DJ or anyone else used the term cocktease, implied that said woman's sole reason for existence is as a receptacle for sperm or that he feels that he should be having sex with a woman who doesn't want to.[/quote]
Huh?

The term cocktease; not used previously, but how else would you sum up in one or two words the scenario described in the OP where a woman appears to come across all friendly to a man and then stops partway? "Cocktease" covers it pretty concisely, I feel.

Sperm receptacle - go back and read it again. Woman as thing: as conquest, as stolen prize. Not woman as person, who might want to fuck or might not, who might want to fuck the other guy and not you.

Having sex with a woman who doesn't want to - that the woman's desires are not even [i]considered[/i]. When the woman responds to the cockblocker,[i] maybe it's because she doesn't want you[/i]. Maybe you don't fit her beauty ideal. Maybe your desperation was noticeable. Maybe he's just her choice, and you've got to put up with it instead of whining like a two-year-old.

[quote name='scrahan' post='1702879' date='Feb 28 2009, 00.09']It's a one-night stand; men and women have them, and neither person really cares that much about the other person, man or woman. It's not misogyny, it's the normal selfishness I expect when people are just thinking about getting laid.[/quote]
True. So why is all the action, all the desire, all the sexual volition, on one side, when [i]men and women have them[/i]?

[Myshkin]

[quote name='TerraPrime' post='1702183' date='Feb 27 2009, 07.34']Re: Myshkin



Did you lose your other 4 fingers in a military accident?[/quote]
It's actually a pretty interesting story:

I was living in Australia when a dingo stole my neighbor's baby. Macho man that I am, I of coarse set out immediately to track that dingo down. After weeks of privation, not a drop of water or a morsel of food had passed my lips since I had set forth on my epic journey, I finally caught up with the culprit and its stolen prize. But alas the dastardly villain was no longer alone. I faced off against what must have been 200 of the largest and most violent dingos the world had ever seen. A lesser man would have failed in his task, but not I! Using only my hands and my prodigious member I destroyed those devilish dingos. My triumph was only marred by the loss of three fingers. Luckily for me though a vagina had witnessed my valliant deeds and it offered to nurse me back to health. I declined the offer and instead seduced the creature with my undeniable charm. That night I sexed the poor thing into a coma. Unfortunately when I woke in the morning I found that the vagina was not as pretty as it had seemed the night before, when I had been drunk on my grand victory. Even more unfortunately I realized that it was sleeping on one of my remaining fingers, making it impossible to extricate myself without waking the creature. Fearless genius that I am, I soon came up with a solution to my problem; I cut off the offending finger and tip-toed away, with the vagina never the wiser! As I made my escape I rejoiced in what a wonderful story this would make for my friends. The only thing I regret it that I completely forgot about the baby.

[VigoTheCarpathian]

I think the difference in terminology may be effecting this thread adversely:

A cockblocker is someone who stands between two humans who have started down the path toward sexual consummation, be it just chatting or making out after puking outside together. I assumed the discussion would hinge on these people, who for whatever reason, prevent their aquaintances from proceeding down this path, probably out of sheer dickishness (men), protectiveness (women), or mental shutdown due to alcohol (both sexes).

I didn't see anything terribly offensive about the OP, because this was my definition. It's not about vag or cock, its about the third person denying you access in a blatant manner to the possibility of even seeing them.

And dude, Myshkin...it's a good thing that no one was there to cockblock you from fucking 200 dingos to death. And then hooking up with a sentient vagina and gnawing your own appendage off to get away from the monstrosity.

ETA: grammar

[Slyfinger]

Those Bakker threads are tearing this board apart. Everybody needs to just chill the fuck out.


Ironically, this thread has been cockblocked from delivering the entertainment and interesting it had the potential to bring.(besides Brady and Jacen :thumbsup: ) This thread was the interesting girl I was flirting with and the Bakker contingent came over and ruined my night. Thanks.


Now I'm going to go home alone and pop in my VHS of Forum Games. :leaving:

[Myshkin]

[quote name='VigoTheCarpathian' post='1702999' date='Feb 27 2009, 19.44']And dude, Myshkin...it's a good thing that no one was there to cockblock you from fucking 200 dingos to death. And then hooking up with a sentient vagina and gnawing your own appendage off to get away from the monstrosity.[/quote]
I don't know, these types of things seem to happen to me once or twice a month. You should hear how I lost the big toe on my left foot. Or the first nine inches of my cock, although that story's really not all that interesting.

[VigoTheCarpathian]

[quote name='Myshkin' post='1703063' date='Feb 27 2009, 21.46']I don't know, these types of things seem to happen to me once or twice a month. You should hear how I lost the big toe on my left foot. Or the first nine inches of my cock, although that story's really not all that interesting.[/quote]

I'm assuming that the big toe story involves Jason Vorhees, and the first nine inches of your cock has something to do with waiting for ADWD.

And to not have it construed as sexist, I think that a lot of history could have benefitted from a good cockblocking. If the western Europeans were cockblocked from hooking up with the Americas by the Asians or the Russians circa 1492, this world would have been vastly more interesting.

[Myshkin]

[quote name='VigoTheCarpathian' post='1703071' date='Feb 27 2009, 21.56']I'm assuming that the big toe story involves Jason Vorhees, and the first nine inches of your cock has something to do with waiting for ADWD.[/quote]
Way off.

[VigoTheCarpathian]

[quote name='Myshkin' post='1703076' date='Feb 27 2009, 21.59']Way off.[/quote]

Vice versa? Or do both disfigurements have something to do with Dostoyevsky? Regardless of what anyone might think, I believe that any penis decapitation involves the cream of the Russian writers, and a big toe might figure in there too.

[SquireThomas]

This forum blows my mind sometimes. Were you people ever young? Do you have any fun, [i]ever[/i]?

Gon:

[quote]Its a fascinating difference to me, Cyrano, especially having grown up in the bible belt. I think the UK 'wins' in this instance just because there seems to be less judging of women who do want to have sex outside of serious relationships. The double standard in the US is what I object to the most- that men want to get laid, but the women who sleep with them are obviously sluts.[/quote]

Frankly, I think most of the judging in this thread is coming from other women, rather than us revolting men. Observe this awesome post from Pots:

[quote]This is it exactly. I'm very often protective of the girls I go out with and it's nothing to do with jealousy. I find drunk guys trying to get me into bed pretty low and disgusting, and the last thing I want to let happen to a friend of mine is to get into a situation where she may feel used afterward[/quote]

Are her friends idiots, or something? Are they totally unable to make their own decisions? I'm seriously not seeing why going home with someone you met at a bar or a party or show or whatever else will result in the girl feeling "used." While Pots may find men hitting on her disgusting for whatever reason, I don't think all women do or should feel this way.


Litechik:

[quote]All I'm asking is that the guys acknowledge their motives and that their object is not in the woman's best interest. Don't tell yourselves lies which make it possible for you to believe that you're not doing anything wrong. I don't judge the whole man by this one very common form of bad behavior.[/quote]

What utter bullshit. I'm really disliking the implication in this thread that just because I pick up a women at a bar, I somehow hate her and am just waiting for the first opportunity to shun her. I've very, [i]very[/i], rarely gone home with a girl that I didn't talk to for at least a few hours beforehand. If our personalities click, and we also click sexually, I don't see the harm in exploring that. So no, thank you very much, I am not fucking doing wrong. One of my longest relationships was with a girl who I hooked up with the night we met (not at a party, though), and all that meant was that our attraction was strong right off the bat.

Also odd is the assumption that every hookup is inherently going to be meaningless, and that every guy in the bar is going to try to fuck and run. Logically, this just makes no sense: if I find a girl who's both cool enough to catch my interest, attractive, [i]and[/i] also likes me back, why the fuck wouldn't I call her again?


Eloisa:

[quote]Getting randomly laid is great. It might be a smarter idea for people like the OP to bear in mind, and to point out where necessary, that getting laid with a woman requires more negotiation than with your own right (or left) hand - that the woman's wishes about the situation are, or should be, taken into account. How about getting laid with a woman who also definitively wants to get laid?[/quote]

I have no idea what you're trying to say here. I don't think anybody is suggesting rape (that obviously includes her being too drunk). Are women incapable of consenting to sex?

In conclusion: while I'll grant that the OP's post was a little dodgy, there are some seriously fucked up things being said about the motivations of men in general in this thread, which comes off as astoudingly hypocritical to me, all things considered.

[Night Watchman]

In my circle of friends, it seems, that it in the case of picking up women, it's every man for himself, so it's basically an anarchy of cockblocking. Me and my best friend never do it to each other, but outside our little bubble, it's a warzone, with the mentality; if you can't keep her, you don't deserve her. Which is really annoying, especially if you're like me, and play the long game.

Note: I appologise for my use of possesive words, and I have the utmost respect for women...well, the ones who aren't total bitches.

[Lyanna Stark]

Good God, teh Stupid in this thread is painful.


[quote name='SergioCQH' post='1702405' date='Feb 27 2009, 19.43']This is not the problem you seem to think it is. I think most women can recognize when a man just wants to get laid. The desperation is fairly obvious to them. Ideally, women will only leave with men who they found interesting and attractive. Here is where the spectre of alcohol and drugs raise their ugly heads, and why I find the hookup scene to be intolerable.[/quote]


Please. How many women have you hooked up with in bars and nightclubs? How many one night stands have you had? My guess is 0.

I think I have a LITTLE BIT more experience than you do in this area and your assumptions are not only false, but grossly misinformed and laughable.

No, people who are looking for one night stands are not normally desperate. They are people who are good at picking up other people of the other sex, normally quite attractive ones too. The absolute BEST people at this are the people who are good looking and know it. I used to be one, I know. These are the people who are young, good looking and not interested in a relationship. It has nothing to do with desperation at all and having a fling or a one night stand can be positive experiences, since it is about seduction and it is flattering, plus you feel pretty good about yourself if you managed to hook up with a really nice looking bloke.


I don't see why that should be any "shallower" than going out for a drink with friends. Just because you are full of prejudice doesn't mean this is true for everyone. As for you "changing your views" of Bale because she had boyfriends/flings as a teenager, what does it matter to you? Why is a woman different for having had flings or one night stands before in her life? Is that your business? Do you feel threatened by it?

In my experience, only men with really poor confidence or total losers have issues with women's previous sexlife.


As for the whole cockblocking business: if you're bad enough at picking somebody up that you're getting cockblocked, you're most likely boring, dressed ugly and uninteresting, cos guess what? A girl who thinks you look hot would not let her friend or anyone else cockblock you.

[Balefont]

[quote name='Eloisa' post='1702752' date='Feb 27 2009, 17.25']Litechick, :thumbsup:


No offence but this is not a response that merits any consideration in a culture, such as Britain's, where the pleasures of sitting down and having a drink are given any weight. Or must the nice pint be a male-only thing? Are you saying pubs are male places?[/quote]


Eloisa, in the US, girls know what types of places to go to for what kind of night they want to have. I prefer pubs as I am less likely to be approached by baller-type jocks but rather dudes I can chat with comfortably about the delicious beer on tap or whatever. I enjoy conversations with random strangers that don't give me the impression that there is an alterior motive. So yes, there are places you can do that and know you can do that.

And there are the places you stay away from if you don't want to feel like an object. People are what they are and you're not going to change them by telling them how they should be. The only thing, as a woman, I have control over is where I choose to go and that decision is always going to be a place that I feel comfortable. The women that choose to go the Rhino Bar in Newport, RI, however, are more than likely looking for objectification like behavior. That, to me, isn't a reflection on the guys who go there, but more on the girls that choose to go there knowingly.

Not sure if all this rambling makes sense. I'm just getting sick of guys getting thrashed here on the boards these past months.

[Lyanna Stark]

[quote name='Balefont' post='1703277' date='Feb 28 2009, 15.00']Not sure if all this rambling makes sense. I'm just getting sick of guys getting thrashed here on the boards these past months.[/quote]


Where have they been? I don't think men have been thrashed as a group anywhere. Not in this thread either, where the moaning seems to be about litechick attacking a really revolting post.

Can you give me some examples of this supposed man hate?

[Balefont]

[quote name='Lyanna Stark' post='1703286' date='Feb 28 2009, 09.29']Where have they been? I don't think men have been thrashed as a group anywhere. Not in this thread either, where the moaning seems to be about litechick attacking a really revolting post.

Can you give me some examples of this supposed man hate?[/quote]

It's just a general yet palpable feeling I've gotten through reading various threads. Guys are ignorant sex driven pigs that us girls have to put up with. Of course with the exception of those enlightened few that "get it".

I dunno, though I agree that "The Battle" is still going on, albeit on a more subtle level, I feel like I [i]personally[/i] have gathered the skills necessary to navigate through these life trials. I will pass this knowledge on to my daughter all the while hoping that things will continue to get better. I don't, however, feel the necessity to protect every one of my female "sisters" when their own worst enemy is not male douchery but themselves.

[Annelise]

Regarding the blunt approach.. my sister had some guy approach her when she was out once.. "So.. wanna fuck?" :lol:
(She declined and he moved on).

Last weekend some guy wanted to buy me a drink. I told him no thanks, married and so forth. Anyway, he comes back around later when I'm up at the bar getting a round, evidently thinking.. well, I don't know what he was thinking, or maybe he was just bombed and not thinking. I blew him off, he didn't accept this, followed me back to our table. So I said look man, I already told you, I'm married, I'm not interested. And then I added that my husband was there. He looks at my friend standing there, like he thought it was bullshit and it was just the male friend pulling the "yeah, I'm married to her/I'm her boyfriend" routine. "Oh, is this him?" I said no, that's him right there, coming back from the bathroom. He looks at my husband and actually double checks this with him. What the fuck, stalker. I wonder if he had had friends with him, if they would have interceded on account of him making a jackass out of himself.

[Balefont]

[quote name='Annelise' post='1703318' date='Feb 28 2009, 10.53']Regarding the blunt approach.. my sister had some guy approach her when she was out once.. "So.. wanna fuck?" :lol:
(She declined and he moved on).

Last weekend some guy wanted to buy me a drink. I told him no thanks, married and so forth. Anyway, he comes back around later when I'm up at the bar getting a round, evidently thinking.. well, I don't know what he was thinking, or maybe he was just bombed and not thinking. I blew him off, he didn't accept this, followed me back to our table. So I said look man, I already told you, I'm married, I'm not interested. And then I added that my husband was there. He looks at my friend standing there, like he thought it was bullshit and it was just the male friend pulling the "yeah, I'm married to her/I'm her boyfriend" routine. "Oh, is this him?" I said no, that's him right there, coming back from the bathroom. He looks at my husband and actually double checks this with him. What the fuck, stalker. I wonder if he had had friends with him, if they would have interceded on account of him making a jackass out of himself.[/quote]

:lol: It's your own damn fault for being beautiful, Annelise. :)

Reminds me of what sorta happened to Mo, Stego's wife, at Boskone this year.

[Stego]

[quote name='Lyanna Stark' post='1703286' date='Feb 28 2009, 09.29']Where have they been? I don't think men have been thrashed as a group anywhere. Not in this thread either, where the moaning seems to be about litechick attacking a really revolting post.

Can you give me some examples of this supposed man hate?[/quote]




Read Stiffed by Susan Faludi.

[Stego]

[quote name='Balefont' post='1703321' date='Feb 28 2009, 10.58']Reminds me of what sorta happened to Mo, Stego's wife, at Boskone this year.[/quote]



I don't give a shit if people hit on Mo. Good for her.