Jaxom 1974 Posted November 25, 2007 Share Posted November 25, 2007 Ah, yes. A good example of the Comb's one adverb per verb, one adjective per noun rule. A couple notes in general: 1. While I like the nickname of "The Comb" for our new hero punching bag, I don't think the name packs the same amount of power when you guys simply say "the Comb" as opposed to saying "The Comb". Kinda like how people in Columbus insist on calling it "THE Ohio State University" as opposed to simply saying, "Ohio State" like the rest of the world. The capitalized "The" lends an air of assumed arrogance that may or may not be justified, thus it's much more fun to say. 2. While the general rule about trolling is a good one and should be adhered to at all times, has anyone tried to question any of these, these, abominations over at the "official" site? You know, engage in a dialogue? Without a proper M*-like figure, there thread as a whole, while fun, lacks teeth. You know what I mean? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lord O' Bones Posted November 25, 2007 Share Posted November 25, 2007 Oh, yes. Duke Newcomb? That is just awesome. While I like the nickname of "The Comb" for our new hero punching bag Actually, I'm preferring "The Duke" right about now. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jaxom 1974 Posted November 25, 2007 Share Posted November 25, 2007 Actually, I'm preferring "The Duke" right about now. Yah. Just so long as the "The" is capatilized, I have no other objections. Call the question! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shryke Posted November 26, 2007 Share Posted November 26, 2007 Can we call the book "The Deuce"? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Atreides Posted November 26, 2007 Share Posted November 26, 2007 I was reading one of Duke Newcomb's sample chapters online, and it took place in some Romanesque council meeting. And guess what was on the roof of the turqouise-walled chamber? Lead skylights. I'm really interested in the Duke's house now; there must be skylights in every room. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Myshkin Posted November 26, 2007 Share Posted November 26, 2007 The last two chapters were the best yet. The sheer idiocy of The Comb's story seems to multiply exponentially with each new chapter. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jaxom 1974 Posted November 26, 2007 Share Posted November 26, 2007 The last two chapters were the best yet. The sheer idiocy of The Comb's story seems to multiply exponentially with each new chapter. Thank you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tzanth Posted November 26, 2007 Share Posted November 26, 2007 Goodkind is a LOT better than this guy. I dont know... much of the fun with the Yeard stems from the fact that the man himself is a nutcase. I havent seen anything yet from nuke'um that's up to par with taries views on democracy and spaghetti. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shryke Posted November 26, 2007 Share Posted November 26, 2007 The Yeard hates spaghetti? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Myshkin Posted November 26, 2007 Share Posted November 26, 2007 Thank you. You're welcome. I dont know... much of the fun with the Yeard stems from the fact that the man himself is a nutcase. I havent seen anything yet from nuke'um that's up to par with taries views on democracy and spaghetti. I have to agree. It seems that Tairy's writing skillz may trump The Comb's (bearly), but Tairy's disgusting philosophy coupled with his undeserved uber-arrogance catapult him well past The Comb in the horrible race. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Real Will Posted November 26, 2007 Share Posted November 26, 2007 The Yeard hates spaghetti? I think, just the fact that it bounces. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Xray the Enforcer Posted November 26, 2007 Share Posted November 26, 2007 Screw you naysayers: Duke Newcomb is the greatest nickname since we first coined "Yeard." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
duchess of malfi Posted November 26, 2007 Share Posted November 26, 2007 I dont know... much of the fun with the Yeard stems from the fact that the man himself is a nutcase. yes, and his hardcore fans are as crazy as he is does The Comb even have hardcore fans? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Atreides Posted November 26, 2007 Share Posted November 26, 2007 The publisher is as arrogant as Goodkind in the case of Newcomb's works. On Amazon, it's description says that this trashbook is in GRRM's camp of realistic fantasy. That's not only very wrong, but quite, quite arrogant. I think I've seen another description saying that Newcomb is at the level of Goodkind, Jordan, and Martin. Goodkind, it's debatable. Jordan, hell no. Martin? Fucking hell no. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Daedalus V2.0 Posted November 26, 2007 Author Share Posted November 26, 2007 So, we're gonna get Tristan/Narissa porn soon? No. Newcomb only graphically describes sex with the evil people. Tristan's sex scenes amount to "They had sex. They both enjoyed it a lot." unless a sorceress is raping him. ETA: XRay: I agree. The new nickname is Duke Newcomb, or The Duke for short. Atreides: This book has "Epic Fantasy of the Year!" Splased across the cover and states that he's the best thing to come to fantasy since Goodkind, while likening him to Martin. Del Ray outdid their usual overhype for this book; in my opinion, they outright lied. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Daedalus V2.0 Posted November 26, 2007 Author Share Posted November 26, 2007 Well, here comes more of The Duke's work. Our heroes, still pretending to be drugged, are walking trough the Recluse. They arrive at the Stables, which seems to me to be rediculously opulent. There's tons of food and wine, plush furnature, and dozens of lithe and virtually naked young slaves cavorting around having sex and such. In the middle is the world's largens Bong, filled to bursting with an equivalent to crack cocaine. The slaves are all very happy, presumably due to the combination of sex, food, alcohol and cocaine. Then, a blue fireball comes out of nowhere and the chapter ends. 5 pages long, a cliffhanger ending and virtually no significance to the story. The Duke just hit an all-time low. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Wolf Maid Posted November 26, 2007 Share Posted November 26, 2007 Screw you naysayers: Duke Newcomb is the greatest nickname since we first coined "Yeard." I agree. No. Newcomb only graphically describes sex with the evil people. Tristan's sex scenes amount to "They had sex. They both enjoyed it a lot." unless a sorceress is raping him. That's so unfair. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Myshkin Posted November 26, 2007 Share Posted November 26, 2007 That's so unfair. I agree, we should have more good guy pr0n. I'm sick of eeevil sorceress pr0n. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
diabloblanco18 Posted November 26, 2007 Share Posted November 26, 2007 I also agree. Guy pr0n always makes a story better. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bacchys Posted November 26, 2007 Share Posted November 26, 2007 Turn back while you can. Please. I stumbled upon The Fifth Sorceress in an airport, looking for something to read on a six hour plane ride, and in a strange fit of utter insanity decided after the train wreck/orgy/Goodkind-fest that was the first few chapters that I'd started it and had nothing else to do for the next few hours, so I might as well finish it. It was not one of the best decisions I've ever made, to say the least. Wow. That's almost word for word I how became afflicted with the knowledge of what lies within that book. And once I started it I had to keep reading to see just how bad it really was. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Archived
This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.