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Dear god, shoot me now


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Ahh, i´m just waiting for the day when someone comes in to my work and asks for this book. How should i react? What will i say?

Favourites so far:

"Do you know where you are sir? Is this a medication issue?"

"NO! Get outta here before i call the police"

"Sorry, we dont carry stupid around here."

Or should i just "smize" at them until they get creeped out and leave?

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Ahh, i´m just waiting for the day when someone comes in to my work and asks for this book. How should i react? What will i say?

Favourites so far:

"Do you know where you are sir? Is this a medication issue?"

"NO! Get outta here before i call the police"

"Sorry, we dont carry stupid around here."

Or should i just "smize" at them until they get creeped out and leave?

"We tried to order it, but we keep misspelling Moddelland, how many L's are in it?"

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Ahh, i´m just waiting for the day when someone comes in to my work and asks for this book. How should i react? What will i say?

Favourites so far:

"Do you know where you are sir? Is this a medication issue?"

"NO! Get outta here before i call the police"

"Sorry, we dont carry stupid around here."

Or should i just "smize" at them until they get creeped out and leave?

"I'm sorry, those are only available to very special customers. We do recommend looking around the store, though. You may find a special token that will increase your odds of accessing our Shit-Lit section by 91%!"

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Okay, guys, it's a toss-up between this and A Dance with Dragons. Which one should I get first? Apart from (probably) being vastly superior in every conceivable way, are there any other qualities that ADWD possesses that should make me pass this book up for it?

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Okay, guys, it's a toss-up between this and A Dance with Dragons. Which one should I get first? Apart from (probably) being vastly superior in every conceivable way, are there any other qualities that ADWD possesses that should make me pass this book up for it?

Well, ADWD doesn't have any Smizes (what's plural for smize? Smizes? Smizee? Smizels?), but whether that's a good or bad thing is entirely up to you.

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Well, ADWD doesn't have any Smizes (what's plural for smize? Smizes? Smizee? Smizels?), but whether that's a good or bad thing is entirely up to you.

Furthermore ADWD is not a standalone, the author expects you have read all the previous books as well. And of course models! with magic! it is a no-brainer.

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:stunned:

RT "@LegendWasHere: @tyrabanks Is it ok for boys to read Model Land too?" - BOYZ AND GIRLZ ARE IN AND CAN READ MY BOOK MODELLAND. TyTy

Well there ya go lads.

I hope this is the quality of prose we can expect from the finished book.

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Gotta love the detail that is going into this work. A 92% better chance if you find a Smize. It is the little details that are important in any great novel.

One has to imagine that if those intoxibellas weren't throwing around random Smizes those 4 ugly chicks who weren't supposed to get into Modelland probably wouldn't have.

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This is actually kind of scary.

Models are bad enough in terms of offering up unreasonably physical expectations and impossible bodies for most women. The last thing we need is people idolizing them more.

I wonder who's ghost writing this. I'm sure they're getting a nice check, but they should feel at least a little guilty.

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Someone on another forum made the effort and rounded up these:

1

2

3

4

5

6

We should give that person a reward. A smize would be appropriate, as who wouldn´t want a 92% better chance of getting into Modelland (someone did their worldbuilding). Tweet#5 led me to This picture. Apparently acording to tweet#3, it could be four Tookie de la Creme´s in the background. Even if i don´t personally find them attractive, I do believe they are models in the vein of what that industry find attractive. Should have got some non-models Ty-Ty, if you wanted them to represent Tookie de la Creme. (Love writing that name. So goood)

Also is that a map of Modelllland Tyra is holding. Some exquisite worldbuilding has gone into this. This novel should be the Creme de la creme.

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We should give that person a reward. A smize would be appropriate, as who wouldn´t want a 92% better chance of getting into Modelland (someone did their worldbuilding). Tweet#5 led me to This picture. Apparently acording to tweet#3, it could be four Tookie de la Creme´s in the background. Even if i don´t personally find them attractive, I do believe they are models in the vein of what that industry find attractive. Should have got some non-models Ty-Ty, if you wanted them to represent Tookie de la Creme. (Love writing that name. So goood)

Also is that a map of Modelllland Tyra is holding. Some exquisite worldbuilding has gone into this. This novel should be the Creme de la creme.

Oh God!

Did you listen to the song from Tweet1?

"Running for their life, their beauty is in strife.

Running from this wasteland and back to Modelland

Can you can you can you survive Modelland

modelland modelland modelland...

4 chicks in green and they all look to me

Running New York Streets Running from this wasteland...."

-k transcript probably not perfect. I really hope she's not saying, "4 chicks in green" because the rest of the song is truly fine poetry.

Whoo! Great morning!

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Also is that a map of Modelllland Tyra is holding. Some exquisite worldbuilding has gone into this. This novel should be the Creme de la creme.

Apparently Modelland is on Long Island, probably near Levittown. After looking at that photo I can't get the phrase "Persimmon Lizzie" out of my head for some reason.

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Goodreads has a summary.

No one gets in without being asked. And with her untamable hair, large forehead, and gawky body, Tookie De La Crème isn’t expecting an invitation. Modelland—the exclusive, mysterious place on top of the mountain—never dares to make an appearance in her dreams.

But someone has plans for Tookie. Before she can blink her mismatched eyes, Tookie finds herself in the very place every girl in the world obsesses about. And three unlikely girls have joined her.

Only seven extraordinary young women become Intoxibellas each year. Famous. Worshipped. Magical. What happens to those who don’t make it? Well, no one really speaks of that. Some things are better left unsaid.

Thrown into a world where she doesn’t seem to belong, Tookie glimpses a future that could be hers—if she survives the beastly Catwalk Corridor and terrifying Thigh-High Boot Camp. Or could it? Dark rumors like silken threads swirl around the question of why Tookie and her new friends were selected . . . and the shadows around Modelland hide sinister secrets.

Are you ready? Modelland is waiting for you. . . .

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