Atheist kids these days...

[Kittykatknits]

Not to hijack this thread or anything, but I would be interested to hear how people came about to lose the faith they were brought up in.

I was raised Catholic and was dragged to church every Sunday no matter what. As a young kid, I didn't give faith or God much thought, mostly thought it was all stories. However, I had a conversation with my mother when I was 11 or 12 who explained to me why men where the head of the household and why women could not be equal decision makers, grounding her reasoning in religion. It was incredibly shocking for me to hear and I remember telling my mother that if this was the case then I'd never marry. I decided that if religion, faith, or viewpoint felt this viewpoint was acceptable then I wanted no part of it. I fully identified as an atheist by the time I was 15 or so.

I've got two kids and intend to raise them both atheist. I don't want my daughter to ever receive the same messages when it comes to religion and gender the way that I did. I want them to understand that being a good person, displaying empathy and compassion for others has nothing to do with being Christian, Jewish, or whatever.

ETA: Thanks Stubby. :)

[I know I know]

If you're really concerned, consider moving to Scandinavia and the Baltic, it's the most atheist region of the world (we even beat Japan, etc).

Here, it's the agnostics who are normal, and the religious people are ones saying apologetic stuff like "I'm a Christian, but not one of those fundie types", the way that atheists often apologise for being atheists in the US.

[Stubby]

...I want them to understand that being a god person, displaying empathy and compassion for others has nothing to do with being Christian, Jewish, or whatever.

This is a great typo. :P

[Kittykatknits]

This is a great typo. :P

LOL, thanks for the catch. :)

[Warg Arry]

You might want to think about getting an advance medical directive in case you are really concerned about your parents trying to interfere in the event you are rendered incapable of making medical decisions for yourself.

I have a piece of card I carry in my purse saying I'm not one of Jehovah's Witnesses and I would accept a blood transfusion should I require one. Along with some other medical info. Signed by myself, a friend and a justice of the peace.

I was recently told that wasn't enough. So I will look into an advanced medical directive.

I will say this about Jehovah's Witnesses, they've done a lot to advance the First Amendment in this country.

I don't know why people fear oblivion. The idea of an eternal Hell is far more disturbing to me than the idea of oblivion.

They do know how to make a stand.

It sucked being a kid and getting punched for not saluting the flag. It wasn't for lack of want. But I was afraid of what would happen to me if I did.

They have also forwarded research into bloodless surgery.

Silver lining is good a thing. Even if it has a dark and stormy centre.

I have never feared oblivion either. I preferred it over the thought of immortality on earth. Even an immortal in a "perfect" world. Never appealed to me.

[Every]

My father is a pretty vehement atheist, while my mother is kind of a wishy-washy agnostic. Religion didn't really feature in my upbringing, but when it did come up my dad cheerfully lampooned everything about it (except for Buddhism, he really likes Buddhism. Every time we went on holiday to Asia we'd come home with a new little Buddha face, and we had a big green statue of Buddha by our front door. None of us are Buddhist, but he keeps buying them anyway! People who came to our house were very confused) so by the time I was sent to an Anglican high school I'd completely internalised the idea that religion was there to be made fun of. If I'm honest, there's part of me that still feels that way, although thankfully with age has come a bit more perspective and respect for other peoples' views.

[Sci-2]

Not to hijack this thread or anything, but I would be interested to hear how people came about to lose the faith they were brought up in.

Losing the faith I was brought up in was relatively easy, for the reasons you brought up - so many religions and why should any of them be right? For awhile I thought all of them might be right, but had to put that aside after a point.

Losing faith in good chunk of anything numinous was more just reading about evidence and rationalism over the last two years, though I'm probably best described as an agnostic.

[Gertrude]

Wow, thanks Arry for sharing. My kindergarden teacher was JW and his daughter was my age. All I really understood about the religion growing up was that they didn't celebrate holidays, etc. I always felt sorry for his daughter when we celebrated Christmas activities in school because she would sit in the hall and read so as not to be part of it. She was really smart and funny, and senior year, I realized that she wouldn't be going to college because of her religion. I have always felt so very sad for her. Up until that point, I had seen it as kind of eccentric, but harmless, but cutting off her education made me rethink all that. Thanks for your perspective on this.

[Eponine]

One of the things that's off-putting to me about potentially having children is navigating the religious boundaries that I'll have to set with my parents.

[Kittykatknits]

I don't know why people fear oblivion. The idea of an eternal Hell is far more disturbing to me than the idea of oblivion.

I don't think of it as oblivion. After I die, my body will return to the earth which is where we all ultimately came from. Circle of life and all that. I find it rather comforting.

[Warg Arry]

Wow, thanks Arry for sharing. My kindergarden teacher was JW and his daughter was my age. All I really understood about the religion growing up was that they didn't celebrate holidays, etc. I always felt sorry for his daughter when we celebrated Christmas activities in school because she would sit in the hall and read so as not to be part of it. She was really smart and funny, and senior year, I realized that she wouldn't be going to college because of her religion. I have always felt so very sad for her. Up until that point, I had seen it as kind of eccentric, but harmless, but cutting off her education made me rethink all that. Thanks for your perspective on this.

Thank you for being understanding. And Thank goodness for the option adult education!

At 21 I had my first birthday party. My friends threw me a sesame street themed surprise party. With a number 1 candle on my birthday cake. I never knew how hurt I was over the years of not celebrating anything. Until that magical moment.

It will forever be a treasured memory.

[Warg Arry]

I don't think of it as oblivion. After I die, my body will return to the earth which is where we all ultimately came from. Circle of life and all that. I find it rather comforting.

Yeah actually this. Lion King circle of life. Made much more sense to me.

[Mya Stone]

Both Dub and I were raised in religion (myself as a Catholic, but my dad was Jewish and I was brought up knowing Jewish customs and holidays but baptised and confirmed Catholic), and Dub as a Christian. However, when we were teens we both strayed from religion and now are quite comfortably agnostic/atheistic. (I'm more agnostic, Dub is more atheist.)

When Mav was old enough to go to preschool we sent him to a Christian one, as it was the only school that had openings in the middle of the year. It was the first time (other than my grandmother blessing Mav, haha - Italian Catholic) that Mav encountered religion. Mav, being a naturally inquisitive and quite intelligent kid, came home with LOTS of questions about God. "Mama, does God really sit on top of the world and look down on everyone?" "Is God alive?" "What does Jesus do for a living?" "Why is that guy on a cross?" I answered them as best as I could, telling him that some people believe in this, but that Daddy and I do not, and he is free to make his own choices as he grows and believe what he wants to believe. He told me he was going to ask Grandma more questions since "She believes in all this God stuff." :lol:

I am curious though, for the people who were raised in a household where religion was just totally non-existent, what did you believe while growing up in regards to like, what happens after you die? Surely most kids must ask their parents that question when they're little at least once?

Mav asked me about 4 months ago where people go when they die. I told him that their bodies return to the Earth, but their spirit lives on forever in the hearts and memories of the people who love them. He seemed okay with that answer. :)

[Francis Buck]

Mav asked me about 4 months ago where people go when they die. I told him that their bodies return to the Earth, but their spirit lives in forever in the hearts and memories of the people who love them. He seemed okay with that answer. :)

That's an amazing answer.

[Mya Stone]

That's an amazing answer.

Aww, thanks. :blushing:

It comforted my 5 year old to know as long as he remembered me I would be with him. He's been having a lot of thoughts on mortality lately. :unsure:

[Gertrude]

And Thank goodness for the option adult education!

At 21 I had my first birthday party. My friends threw me a sesame street themed surprise party. With a number 1 candle on my birthday cake. I never knew how hurt I was over the years of not celebrating anything.

I didn't keep in touch with her and don't know what she decided to do after high school, but I know she wanted to go to college, so I hope she found a way to do so. And awesome birthday story!

... but their spirit lives on forever in the hearts and memories of the people who love them. He seemed okay with that answer. :)

Yeah, I like this answer too. As a matter of fact, it's something my dad always says, so perhaps it was the answer he gave me as a child. I hope so anyway :)

[Jaxtile]

I went to a catholic private school until I was 11. Mass every Wednesday. Pews sucked and they didnt let me sneak in books. I don't know exactly when I decided it was bollocks but it was early.

The final nail in the coffin was a summer camp. Bastards told my brother and I the Donkey Kong 64 players guide was inappropriate reading material. I asked why and they told me the bible was the book I should be reading.

I scoffed and told them I already read it. (I had, I skipped plasms and flipped through the genealogy sections but I read the whole king James sometime in grade 3 or 4) I read aloud some random miracle, told them dragonlance has better magic and thier eyes bugged out. Bastards still took away my donkey kong.

That camp sucked for other reasons too. The boys slept in shantytowns and modified barns while the girls had brand new bunkhouses. Skeeters everywhere and crap breakfast foods.

[Seli]

...

Mav asked me about 4 months ago where people go when they die. I told him that their bodies return to the Earth, but their spirit lives on forever in the hearts and memories of the people who love them. He seemed okay with that answer. :)

Every few years, when visiting a church for sightseeing reasons, I'll burn a candle just to help me focus on those people that have died. One of those small ceremonies that remain somehow meaningful after the religious framework has gone.

[Merentha]

I was recently told that wasn't enough. So I will look into an advanced medical directive..

This may still not be enough, by the way. Family can override advanced directives pretty easily, though usually they do it the other way (signing someone up for treatments they'd otherwise said they didn't want)

[Gears of the Beast]

I wouldn't "raise my kid to be an atheist". I would raise my child to be skeptical of bullshit claims (especially religion), question everything and develop critical thinking skills. I wouldn't attempt to instill my position on anything in them (including whether or not there is a God). I consider indoctrination of children into religion to be one of the most abhorrent, immoral and scumfuck things anyone could ever do.