Ser Loras The Gay Posted March 29, 2017 Author Share Posted March 29, 2017 1 minute ago, Tom Cruise said: Show me some text. Last we know about Syrio is he schooled a bunch of guards with a stick because he was too quick to be touched. I'm assuming when he lost his stick he just ran away quickly? Seriously is there any real evidence of him being killed by Trant? Is there some evidence showing him running around KL? Why would Meryn Trant leave him alive? He was full armored, he could simple run over Syrio and fall on him. And you're the one who needs to show us evidence that he is alive. Meryn Trant was the man leaving the room, not Syrio Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lucius Lovejoy Posted March 29, 2017 Share Posted March 29, 2017 @Ser Loras The Gay the theory goes that the rubies making up thr dragon on Rhaegars black breastplate actually worked a glamour (similar to Mance and Rattleshirt with the ruby from Melisandre) so that it wasn't really him that Robert killed. Rhaegar fans use the rubies and their own insistance that Rhaegar was too perfect/great a fighter to lose to Robert as evidence of this. The Ashara Dayne theories mostly involve her being some Septa - Mordane, Lemore, Unella, you name if they've claimed it - turning to religion in her despair and also having the chance to either be close to Eddard or Barristan, or watch over Jon, etc. I've seen in claimed she and Ned/Barristan/Arthur/Brandon/Howland f'n Reed fathered a kid. I love these theories because they are so far out, and there is so little of Ashara mentioned in the text (all by unreliable narrators) that it seems like harmless tinfoil really borne out of a 6 year wait for a new book. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ser Loras The Gay Posted March 29, 2017 Author Share Posted March 29, 2017 3 minutes ago, Lucius Lovejoy said: The Ashara Dayne theories mostly involve her being some Septa - Mordane, Lemore, Unella, you name if they've claimed it - turning to religion in her despair and also having the chance to either be close to Eddard or Barristan, or watch over Jon, etc. I've seen in claimed she and Ned/Barristan/Arthur/Brandon/Howland f'n Reed fathered a kid. I love these theories because they are so far out, and there is so little of Ashara mentioned in the text (all by unreliable narrators) that it seems like harmless tinfoil really borne out of a 6 year wait for a new book. But like all those far fetched theories we need to awser something. What it does to the story? Like, really, why'd George fake the death of so many characters like that? Why people feel the urge to discredit the text as a whole? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
White Ravens Posted March 30, 2017 Share Posted March 30, 2017 HR = HS (Howland Reed is the High Sparrow). A theory that requires a follower of the Old Gods to pass himself off as the Westeros equivalent of the Pope. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ser Loras The Gay Posted March 30, 2017 Author Share Posted March 30, 2017 9 minutes ago, White Ravens said: HR = HS (Howland Reed is the High Sparrow). A theory that requires a follower of the Old Gods to pass himself off as the Weteros equivalent of the Pope. OMG I forgot that one. This is GOLD. When I first read this theory I was like "seriously?". The fact that he'll do that just to create chaos among KL is just mindblowing stupid hahaha Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
White Ravens Posted March 30, 2017 Share Posted March 30, 2017 3 minutes ago, Ser Loras The Gay said: OMG I forgot that one. This is GOLD. When I first read this theory I was like "seriously?". The fact that he'll do that just to create chaos among KL is just mindblowing stupid hahaha I am glad to have been of service. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ser Loras The Gay Posted March 30, 2017 Author Share Posted March 30, 2017 We need a compilation with these "no quote from the book to back it up" theories. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ralphis Baratheon Posted March 30, 2017 Share Posted March 30, 2017 My personal favorite is the one that Jon is the son of a bar wench and fisherman and that Ned adopted him in Wintertown after the bar wench died. He passed Jon off as his bastard because the Tullys forced him to marry Cat when he was betrothed to Ashara and he wanted to piss them off in his own passive aggressive way. Jon looking like Ned destroys this crackpot, to bad. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lord Wraith Posted March 30, 2017 Share Posted March 30, 2017 39 minutes ago, White Ravens said: HR = HS (Howland Reed is the High Sparrow). A theory that requires a follower of the Old Gods to pass himself off as the Westeros equivalent of the Pope. I have always enjoyed a bit of crackpot from time to time (since we have nothing better to do until Winds) but I have always loathed this theory. It makes zero sense despite some interesting but far from conclusive evidence. 24 minutes ago, Ser Loras The Gay said: We need a compilation with these "no quote from the book to back it up" theories. Careful plenty of these crackpot theories will use the text to back them up. Problem is a lot of this is subjective in how you understand it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
White Ravens Posted March 30, 2017 Share Posted March 30, 2017 29 minutes ago, Lord Wraith said: I have always enjoyed a bit of crackpot from time to time (since we have nothing better to do until Winds) but I have always loathed this theory. It makes zero sense despite some interesting but far from conclusive evidence. I'm old-school and I still read books made of paper. When I read the HR=HS theory it was the first time I realized that crackpot theories were starting to get more convoluted and have more quotes and support material because people were now able to search all of the text on their e-readers rather than flipping through their paperbacks. I still think HR=HS is crackpot but it does at least try to find support in the text. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ser Walter of AShwood Posted March 30, 2017 Share Posted March 30, 2017 Is it okay if I post "The Icebrandon" here as well? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Orphalesion Posted March 30, 2017 Share Posted March 30, 2017 4 hours ago, White Ravens said: I'm old-school and I still read books made of paper. When I read the HR=HS theory it was the first time I realized that crackpot theories were starting to get more convoluted and have more quotes and support material because people were now able to search all of the text on their e-readers rather than flipping through their paperbacks. I still think HR=HS is crackpot but it does at least try to find support in the text. Personally I think that every theory with which the respective thread has a pages-long introductory post featuring HTML formatting (especially coloured text, random quotes and links to wikipedia articles (or some other, fisher websites) is complete bullcrap. Most of the time those posts just advocate theories that are waaaaaay to complicated, convoluted and counter-intuitive and present the simplest pieces of common knowledge (i.e. who Odin is or what a Fallen Angel is) as brilliant strokes of "original research" (we can all use google, folks...) Sometimes they even get their facts wrong (Like saying tricksters are never actual gods in mythology, or saying that dragons can't have two legs because of Dungeons and Dragons) but we are still supposed to take their slurs of coloured and bold texts seriously after that. 11 hours ago, Ser Loras The Gay said: Please explain that to me. And, omg. I thought the most far fetched theory of all was the Ned being alive, but this one about Varys being a Merman takes the cake. Any others you guys want to share here? I can't remember too much about it, in the Worldbook there's this passage about some historical Emperors (or was it contemporary? I'm not sure about that even) that were named after gemstones and some people proposed the theory that those gemstone emperors correspond to some of our characters, (I think the Amethyst Empress was supposed to be Dany's equivalent) Stuff like that isn't really my taste so I didn't memorizee any of it, but I think it goes with the "theory" that gemstones MUST have meaning in ASoIaF (because a freaking emerald, can't just be a green stone, apparently) In general I don't like theories that turn every background event into a metaphor, becauske I think it makes the world artificial and goes against the realism advocated by the books. Well right now I can't recall too many additional crackpot theories, but there was this thread started by a guy who insisted that some old GURPS setting from the 90s MUST be connected to ASoIaF (or even have been ghostwritten by GRRM) because it featured the threat of a dawning Ice Age and a winter god named "Hodr". He apparently hadn't looked too much into Norse Mythology... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
White Ravens Posted March 30, 2017 Share Posted March 30, 2017 1 hour ago, Orphalesion said: Personally I think that every theory with which the respective thread has a pages-long introductory post featuring HTML formatting (especially coloured text, random quotes and links to wikipedia articles (or some other, fisher websites) is complete bullcrap. Most of the time those posts just advocate theories that are waaaaaay to complicated, convoluted and counter-intuitive and present the simplest pieces of common knowledge (i.e. who Odin is or what a Fallen Angel is) as brilliant strokes of "original research" (we can all use google, folks...) Sometimes they even get their facts wrong (Like saying tricksters are never actual gods in mythology, or saying that dragons can't have two legs because of Dungeons and Dragons) but we are still supposed to take their slurs of coloured and bold texts seriously after that. Ha ha! There was one of those recently and the opening post was so long that I just had to copy and paste it to get a word count. Fifteen thousand words! Personally, I'd rather read The Hedge Knight (also about 15,000 words) than the opening post of a crackpot theory. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ser Loras The Gay Posted March 30, 2017 Author Share Posted March 30, 2017 48 minutes ago, White Ravens said: Ha ha! There was one of those recently and the opening post was so long that I just had to copy and paste it to get a word count. Fifteen thousand words! Personally, I'd rather read The Hedge Knight (also about 15,000 words) than the opening post of a crackpot theory. 15000 words????????? Dude this is insane, I've read books that are smaller than this. And frankly, why would someone waste that many time writing a theory like this? Make a video on youtube of you simply speaking your mind hahaha Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Neddy's Girl Posted March 30, 2017 Share Posted March 30, 2017 13 hours ago, Ser Loras The Gay said: That's a very veery common theory, but it's not supported by any quote from the book. It's a peculiar one also, it changes who was at the tower of joy, or simply adds someone. You're right, Jon is still a bastard even if they had married. Poligomy even with targs in Westeros wasn't very well seen. I need more crazy crackpots you guys can do it better. Because he is. Hahahhaa Right, on my phone and it's being rubbish so see below... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Neddy's Girl Posted March 30, 2017 Share Posted March 30, 2017 I just feel like even if Jon is legitimate because (a few) Targs practice polygamy (being the only evidence), it doesn't matter because that dynasty is over. Both Dany and Aegon plan to take the throne by conquest. By the way, I believe Aegon is real! Also I don't believe Jon being king is the point of this story, I think it minimises it. Talking of meta reasons for believing stuff, I really don't want Jon to ne Ned's because I want GRRM to subvert the booooring trope that is the adulterous hero (present in almost every drama on telly!) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ser Loras The Gay Posted March 30, 2017 Author Share Posted March 30, 2017 1 minute ago, Neddy's Girl said: Also I don't believe Jon being king is the point of this story, I think it minimises it. Exactly that. Jon being king at the end doesn't make any sense. He doesn't have an army, he doesn't have gold, he doesn't have much allies, he is mostly likely a bastard. There's just 3 people in the whole world who can tell him about his real parantage. Bloodraven, Bran and Howland Reed. Even if he can reach one of these characters, what's the point of him knowing it? Being a Targaryen even a legitimate one, doesn't bring any advantage right now. Daenerys if had to choose anyone to marry, would choose Aegon or any other lord willingly to bend the knee afterwards. So, EVEN and it's a big EVEN Daenerys marries jon. Why would she make him king? She'd mostly likely to rule as a queen rather than letting a man with no army, no gold, no allies and a bastard on the Throne. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Neddy's Girl Posted March 30, 2017 Share Posted March 30, 2017 Ugh, Dany and Jon marrying would be the worst ending for me. But I hate, hate "shipping" of any sort anyway. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
imopatis Posted March 30, 2017 Share Posted March 30, 2017 I think if someone had posted on this forum a year ago a theory about the future of Dorne, and guessed correctly what D&D were to come up with in the TV show, that theory would have easily taken cake as the most crackpot theory ever. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lost Melnibonean Posted March 30, 2017 Share Posted March 30, 2017 http://asoiaf.westeros.org/index.php?/topic/145471-roose-bolton-is-a-descendant-of-uthor-underleaf-and-the-female-line-of-bolton/ http://asoiaf.westeros.org/index.php?/topic/134813-dancy-is-tywins-bastard/ http://asoiaf.westeros.org/index.php?/topic/132900-darkstar-is-a-brightflame/ http://asoiaf.westeros.org/index.php?/topic/127378-the-dusky-woman-is-missandeis-mum/ And my favorite one of all... So there's that little box about the Mountain Clans in the Vale, TWOIAF that says the Burned Men were spun off the Painted Dogs when they were enthralled by a fire a witch with a dragon. I read Alys into this when I first read it but the more likely candidate was Nettles since the fire witch commanded a dragon, but... What if the dragon wasn't a dragon like Sheepstealer but the child of Aemond One-Eye?!? Maybe one of those weird little dragon babies Targaryens are always having, you dig? And what if Timett (who has one eye, get it?) is not only the true heir to the Vale (as we all know is true, right?), but also a descendant of ol' One-Eye?!? Dude's gonna ride Viserion after Brown Ben gets whacked. I got half a groat says so. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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