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Risto

Boardology - resurrected...

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Hello everyone and welcome to the resurrected thread Boardology. The original Boardology thread was created by the Winter’s Knight, and it was dedicated to explain us how exactly this forum functions. For like every breathing organism, this forum has rules of its own existence. The thread was funny, interesting and led to some very interesting conclusions.

I have to say I am really glad Winter’s Knight gave me permission to continue her legendary thread, and that I can only hope this thread will be worthy of its predecessor. Also, in order to continue this thread on the best possible way, I’ll have to set few ground rules. I would ask you not to turn this into chatter thread. We are here on a mission to create thread that will be useful to all new members, as well amusing to the old ones. Let us keep of the radar of locking mechanism. Don’t insult posters. We all have our favorites and sometimes we are irrational about their talents. It’s normal and we all know that. Also, contribute. I have gathered some conclusions from previous Boardology thread, and I added couple of my own. But, that certainly isn’t the full list. So, please be free to add or correct me anywhere you need to…

And now, here comes the Principles of Boardology:

1. Starks’ laws

a. Every discussion dedicated how bad, stupid or evil Starks are won’t end well

b. Every discussion about Cat, will lead to assessment of her relationship with Jon (
Cat’s Law
)

c. You can’t discuss Sansa without mentioning Tyrion

d. When you discuss warging, there will be at least one poster reminding you that all Starks are wargs.

e. Every discussion about Jon, must be either pro or against him being AAR/PTWP

f. Any discussion about RR will lead to term known as Nedbert

g. Sansa discussions will always have a post about how similar she is to Ned

h. Any thread mentioning Starks, must have at least two posts about killing all the Freys

i. Discussions about Robb will always be how stupid he was

j. You can’t talk about Stark sisters without someone mentioning how Arya is Stark, and Sansa Tully.

k. There is no way you could talk about Jon, without mentioning parentage theories

l. When Sansa is in question, LF and Tyrion are perverts, but Sandor isn’t.

m. Any thread dedicated to future of Starks must have one post in which someone refers to Grand Northern Conspiracy thread.

n. Any Catelyn discussion will at least mention her release of Jaime, and how should she have been punished for that.

o. Somehow there can be no Bran thread without at least one member having a post containing HODOR.

2. Lannisters’ laws

a. A week can’t pass without someone claiming that at least one of Tywin’s children isn’t his, but Aerys’.

b. You can’t discuss Tyrion without mentioning the rape

c. There is no discussion about Cersei without at least one person calling her a bitch

d. Discussions about Joffrey will always lead to discussion how bad mother Cersei was

e. You can’t mention Tommen, without mentioning Ser Pounce

f. Discussions about Wo5K will always conclude that Lannisters were lucky.

g. Talking about Jaime is talking about his redemption road. There’s no other way.

h. Every Tyrion thread will have one poster claiming he is the best person for King.

i. Someone will always question whether Tommen is Robert’s.

j. When you discuss Tywin, someone is bound to mention how he is overestimated as commander.

3. Targaryens’ laws

a. There will always be those to claim Targaryens are fireproof

b. There will always be those to claim Targaryens mated with dragons

c. There will always be those to claim Targaryens are immune to all sort of sickness

d. You can’t like both Jon and Dany. Choose one.

e. There is no discussion about Dany, without quoting her line about silly little girl.

f. There is no discussion about Dany, that claim/right dilemma isn’t properly debated

g. There is no discussion about future wars, without someone claiming that dragons are invincible

h. You can’t discuss Dany without someone questioning her capability to rule

i. Every Dany debate will lead to mentioning Daario Naharis

4. Baratheons’ laws

a. Every thread leads to Stannis. No matter how different subject is, the chances of Stannis being mentioned is extremely high, in any form

b. Any thread about Robert and Cersei’s marriage will end up in conversation about marital rape.

c. There is no conversation about Robert without mentioning his warhammer

d. You can’t mention Renly without gay factor

e. You can’t talk about Renly without someone inexplicably saying Renly would have made a great King

f. You can’t discuss Stannis without mentioning Stavos

g. There will always be those to claim Stannis did nothing wrong

h. To speak about Stannis, is to speak about `One true King`

i. Stannis is badass. Deal with that. You must have heard it.

j. Someone will always claim that Davos is the most honorable living man in Westeros.

5. Other Houses` laws

a. You can’t discuss about Theon without mentioning his penis

b. You can’t talk about AFFC, without someone saying how boring Dorne storyarc is.

c. You can’t mention Oberyn without admitting he’s the coolest man ever living in Westeros

d. None of Greyjoy appreciation threads will end up well

e. Margaery is always described as player in Game of thrones

f. If mentioned, we all forgive Olenna’s killing of Joffrey

g. There are always those claiming Varys knows everything.

h. You can’t discuss Robert Arryn, without someone claiming he’s LF’s son.

i. There is certain number of character you don’t want to say anything against: Oberyn, QOT, Blackfish, Davos, GreatJon…

6. General Boardology rules

a. Even though we have pinned thread about R+L=J that has 53 editions, those who want to discuss the subject, always feel compelled to start new thread about it

b. Even though it’s forbidden, people can’t stop asking when will GRRM finish ASOIAF

c. Search function is mysterious device to half of this community

d. Any heated dispute will inevitably devolve in some variation ‘’maybe you should actually read the books’’

7. Inevitable posters’ laws

a.
Apple’s law
. Any thread devoted to Dany being PTWP, and Targaryens being fireproof and immune to sicknesses, will draw one of the most famous member –
Apple Martini
. And when she comes with cold logic and impressive knowledge of ASOIAF, you better watch.

b.
Tze’s law
.
Tze
is one of those members we don’t see a lot, but when we do, we have to express our admiration.
Tze
ends the threads. After her, usually long, but incredibly insightful posts, you can only say: I agree/This/What Tze said. Simply after her post, nothing smart to say is left.

c.
Champions` law
. Each of character has its champions defending it in any instance. Here are some:

d.
Jon
. Jon has pretty big fandom, but
Apple Martini, Jon’s Queen Consort
will put their hands for her favorite. Many others are truly Jon’s champions but these two ladies truly believe in him.

e.
Dany
. There isn’t big Dany fandom here, but those that like her are relentless.
Patrick Stormborn
is one member who’ll defend Dany to the last breathe on this forum.

f.
Sansa
. After establishing Pawn to player thread, ladies of the thread made a very clear message – We will make you love her.
Brashcandy, Rapsie, Lyanna Stark and Kittykatknitts,
with humble addition of me, defend Sansa in any occasion. And we do tremendous job. Trolls fall under our logic, posters surrender to us. You may love or hate us, but we endure…

g.
Stannis.
This guy has no fandom, he has an army. Led by
E-Ro,
Stannisguard is strong and united in convincing everyone Stannis is the one true King.

h.
Dr Pepper’s law.
For the good half of her time here, you don’t know whether she is joking or not. The other half is sheer brilliance. With best humor on the thread, Dr P will make you believe in unbelievable, but you also want to make sure she isn’t playing you. That doesn’t mean she is only joking. Oh, no. She is one of the most insightful posters on the thread and one of the best friends you could find here.

i.
Reread law.
Any reread thread organized by ‘Three musketeers’ –
butterbumps, Lummel
and
Ragnorak
is pure gold. To each thread they organize and are involved in, they bring dose of brilliance you rarely meet. Their insightful Jon and Tyrion Reread threads, and their contributions all around the boards, made them truly respectable members.

j.
Fire Eater’s law.
Somewhere between Jon and Dany fandom,
Fire Eater
is our very own crystal ball. He is a poster with tremendous record when it comes to theories and foreshadowings. Any thread about Dance of dragons 2.0 will inevitably refer to the thread
Fire Eater
opened.

k.
Mladen’s religion law/ King of the Starks rule.
Time to talk a bit about me. You simply can’t open a religion thread without me posting there. I will attack you politely about the idea of `One true religion`, and I will present my arguments against it. As one of my friends said on one of Religion threads. Mladen is coming :)

l.
Most important – Mods’ laws.
Don’t break them. They are here for a reason. They provide us good entertainment and enjoyment. Don’t offend others, don’t chat on threads, don’t go off topic, and don’t personalize debates. Simply, enjoy and let others enjoy.

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Mladen's law: Whever gods or religion is mentioned, Mladen will inevitably be involved.

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Mladen's law: Whever gods or religion is mentioned, Mladen will inevitably be involved.

Must be included.

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...I have to say I am really glad Winter’s Knight gave me permission to continue his legendary thread...

Winter's Knight is of the female gender, might be worth remembering when you refer to her ;)

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Troll Laws

a. There will always be a troll in this forum

b. Trolls always provide some sort of amusement and/or frustration

c. Trolls will always take it too far

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Excellent!!!Best post of the week.

Why does every topic start with 8] ?

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Winter's Knight is of the female gender, might be worth remembering when you refer to her ;)

The worst thing is that I knew that... I didn't even know I made that mistake :). But, thanks.

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The Mladen's religion law is right, Mladen is Coming.

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Sansa's Law: Any Sansa discussion must involve Brashcandy at some point.

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I need to write down this :o

Everything you said is true

I am glad you like it...

The Mladen's religion law is right, Mladen is Coming.

That's actually your law...

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Sansa's Law: Any Sansa discussion must involve Brashcandy at some point.

I wrote that. She is true champion of Sansa...

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Law of Troll threads: All troll threads will eventually become chat threads.

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That's actually your law...

It's a good law then :)

Also in Jon thread about him being R's+L's, there'll always be one person that says the KG at the ToJ doesn't prove he's a legitimate Targ and Rhaegar and Lyanna married.

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Kienn's Law: Unless two separate PoV characters have witnessed the same thing, it is not a fact.

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As the time a female poster has been on the forum increases, the probability of being asked for naked pics will approach 1.

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Kienn's Law: Unless two separate PoV characters have witnessed the same thing, it is not a fact.

That's actually a great law...Truly brilliant

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