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Crixus

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  1. I tried Bumble a couple of years ago when I'd broken up with my bf. I think online dating is definitely skewed toward women: I created an extremely basic, thin profile and had literally 100s of 'requests' or whatever it's called in the first 2 hours. Since women have to initiate contact, I tried sifting through and got in touch with a few. My criteria was pretty much 'I'd like to get to know someone, not interested in a quick shag'. Thing is, a lot of the men prominently featured 'interested in a real relationship' etc. on their profiles but once I connected with them, all but one wanted to immediately meet up or even, lol, come over!!1! There was one I chatted with for a few days, found him nice enough, and finally mustered the nerve to meet at a bar near my place. The date was pleasant enough, but literally the next day he started messaging me on the lines of 'if you're not interested in meeting at my place this evening, I have another chick who is'. So, yeah, that was it. Luckily, my bf and I reconnected a few months later and things have been great since. I cannot imagine doing this again and if I am ever single, I guess I'll just be celibate :P.
  2. This shitshow is still going on. The deadline to form a government is next week, and now the cunts who basically lost the election are forming a 'coalition'. Which probably won't last a year. Pathetic, really. I was actually impressed with how people came out and voted peacefully on 8 Feb - it's the best way to make a stand and demonstrate what the nation actually wants. Alas, the military has always been in charge and nothing will change this, barring a bloody uprising or mutiny within the ranks. You can criticise Imran Khan a lot, fairly, but the fact is he managed to create unprecedented levels of political awareness, and a desire to claim constitutional rights, among the people. I think this won't change, regardless of the next puppet government. Partition should never have happened, imo. It's a controversial view in Pakistan but I really think this was destined to be a disaster from day one. People point to the last 10 years of Modi's government as retroactive proof of how partition was a great idea. In fact, all it did was divide Muslims into 3 separate countries (PK, India and Bangladesh in 1971). Imagine one India, with a massive Muslim minority - you cannot sideline 45% (approx if combined) of the population. Perhaps the entire trajectory of communal issues would have been different if the ugliness of partition had been avoided. Perhaps these communities which had already lived together for centuries (my grandparents had so many anecdotes about being neighbours and close-as-family with Hindus and Sikhs) could have continued to co-exist, and a united India would have been a force to reckon with. India still is, of course, but that would have been an entirely different story. Maybe I'm being too naive, but what's happening right now isn't exactly amazing - not just for PK which is decaying massively but even India, with all the extremist shit happening thanks to BJP and co.
  3. Yes, there are huge expat PK communities all over and they mostly support Khan. That says, 'avenge persecution with your vote' btw.
  4. Yep, exactly. Still no news on who will form a government - classic bizarre Pakistan!
  5. Yeah, still unresolved. They did everything they possibly could to stop this happening: threw Imran Khan in jail, did farcical trials where he wasn't even represented by his own defence lawyers and not allowed to have witnesses, and then put a ludicrous charge of his marriage being 'unlawful' by apparently arresting his wife's ex-husband and coercing him into charging her with getting married before the 'waiting period' of 3 months post their divorce. This is a Muslim thing that is apparently in place to determine if the woman may be pregnant from her former husband, so that any child's paternity is clear. This last case had the entire country in an uproar because it's long been understood and accepted that such matters are to be settled personally and in private, not court. They also took away the party's election symbol (cricket bat, as Imran is an ex-cricketer), significant in a country where 40% are illiterate and rely on symbols to cast their vote. They suspended internet and mobile services on the day, picked up loads of candidates and their families etc. etc. And yet, the party's candidates, standing as 'independent' but known to represent the party, won by a majority in most places. This despite massive rigging on the day. I've heard that women and young people turned out in unprecedented numbers and turnout is said to be at least 40%, perhaps up till 48% which is incredible for Pakistan. To me it just seals the overwhelming rejection by the people of the 'establishment' aka military. It's a good thing. Another good thing is that the gross taliban affiliated party, TLP, did not win a single seat at the national level, and only a couple at the provincial level (if that). I suppose a shitstorm is unfolding though, because these cunts will never give up power.
  6. I totally agree, the system is shit, and rigged, and completely unfair. Equal opportunity does not exist, as you say. I chose not to have kids and I'm so grateful in many ways for that decision. When I look at the pressure my sis takes on simply because she wants to do what she believes is the best possible for her kids, I feel for her. I can't imagine doing all that myself, and I suppose that is one excellent reason I'm not a mum. @BigFatCoward yes, it is morally repugnant. But I can make that judgment more easily because I do not have kids - perhaps if I did, I would rather give them that opportunity and privilege even if I thought it was repugnant, and I suspect it is that way for some parents.
  7. I totally get that. I was the eldest and I went to a decent uni in Pakistan (decent for Pakistan anyway), whereas my younger sister of 2 (not the one with the kids) went to the UK because by that time, my mum could afford to send her. She worked day and night to get a job after college (McDonald's for quite some time), and is now, 20 years later, working at a great position in a bank. My brother, who is the youngest, went to Canada for college and worked as a security guard for nearly a year (night shifts) until he got an entry level job at LobLaws. They both ended up with more opportunities than I did because, let's face it, a Pakistani degree ain't all that in other countries. I did an additional UK qualification (remotely) on my own when I could, and that helped with the career stuff.
  8. Yes, absolutely. Many times. If my nephew said he didn't want to go at all, she wouldn't send him. And, they have now opted for Winchester because it's close enough for him to come home every weekend.
  9. A bit of context from my side: 1. We come from a middle-class family in Pakistan. My dad was an alcoholic who died when we were very young, and my mum was a housewife who'd never worked. From there, she studied, started a job (at a low level) and worked her way up to a place where she could send us all to the best colleges she could afford - whilst living in an extremely conservative society as a widow. Just mentioning this in case people think we're some sort of posh, rich family. We most certainly are not. We are now all doing well in our careers, and that is thanks to all the work she put in. 2. There is absolutely a lot of classism both in Pakistan and in the UK, and despite working your butt off, the lack of connections does matter. My sister simply wants to give her kids every advantage she can, and I'm certainly not going to judge her or shit on her for that. 3. It's not simply about 'people caring about that sort of thing' though there is that - it's also that, growing up in an environment where who you know does matter in real, demonstrable ways, my sister wants to do what she can to give her kids every chance she can. It doesn't mean she's cruel or barbaric or doesn't give a fuck about her kids - quite the opposite. Some of the comments here come off as weirdly judgmental. @Spockydog , sure, and I've also seen positive anecdotes from people. Also, people can get assaulted in non-boarding schools too. Re 'cruel', my sister is an incredible mum, and I'm getting a bit tired of your insistence on labelling her as 'cruel' when you don't know dick about her. She isn't a millionaire who's casually packing her kids off to boarding school because she can't be bothered - she's working her arse off to do what she thinks is best for them. But I'll be sure to discuss the links you shared (not being sarcastic) because it is of course important to be aware of this. @mormont from the amount of studying and intensive prep my nephew did for well over a year to apply to these schools, I was under the impression it isn't easy to get in and that it's not just a function of how much you can pay. I might be wrong, so please correct me.
  10. That is precisely why I said earlier that my sister 'is willing to do without a lot'. She and her family have taken plenty of steps to live frugally and save - her husband inherited a bit of money recently and rather than using it elsewhere, they're using it here. Personally, I'd make other choices, but this is what they want.
  11. I wouldn't know the details about private vs. public in the UK as I don't live there and I'm not a mum. I studied at a convent run by nuns in Pakistan, which cost next to nothing and was truly excellent, so there is that. I'm sure you make valid points about the nuances, but again, if some parents think such schools can provide kids with tools to help succeed, it's a perfectly valid choice for them. My nephew and niece are very much surrounded by books, art and other resources, and they're certainly not kept away from the real world - they're very much a part of it.
  12. You know, I'm generally in agreement with your posts, but this is fucking ridiculous and bordering on ad hominem. My sister is a Pakistani Brit who works her butt off, and is decidedly middle-class. She wants to give her kids the best possible future and opportunities, and for her a private school education is one of them. She's a great mum, and her kids are amazing and really well brought up. So anyone who throws around ludicrous shit like 'tarred and feathered' and 'barbaric' can fuck right off. How offensive and unwarranted, honestly. And I'm really sorry about what happened to you, truly. But the idea that all kids going there get sexually abused, or that's the only place where sexual abuse can take place, is bizarre.
  13. Agree, and that's why my sister has invested so much time and effort into this - she says she'll do without a lot, but her priority is giving her 2 kids (nephew and niece) the best possible education. It's literally the only thing she and her husband can agree on And luckily, they've both been raised right so hopefully won't transform into unbearable little shits anytime soon. Even now, they go to a posh school which has the likes of one of Jacob Rees-Mogg's *vomit* kids, along with the grandson of an absolutely vile, corrupt Pakistani politician: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Nawaz_Sharif They're not friends, safe to say.
  14. My nephew currently has to choose between Winchester and Harrow - I think I'll recommend he drop the latter
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