Children and Same Sex Couples

[Foxtrot0245]

I understood the question and put forth my method for handling a situation like this. My answer did not fit into the close-ended format of the question, but it is still a valid submittal.

I feel the need to ask my own question now: why does what I said make me a bad person? I made no attempts to ostracize or convert any gay person from their lifestyle, which is widely accepted and defended. But I put forth my own lifestyle choices of what I believe to be proper and acceptable and give solicited advice about how I handle similar situations around my kid and people act like I'm the devil...

[Sci-2]

I feel the need to ask my own question now

A perfectly valid question, but one suited to another thread.

(I'm honestly not trying to be a dick, I just think it's a bit unfair to derail the OP's thread.)

[Stubby]

I don't understand, a question was asked and everyone loses their minds when an answer pops up that doesn't match the preconceived answer. What is the point of asking the question if society already has its mind set as to what is the appropriate answer?

Firstly, I assume by 'society' you mean 'Foxtrot'.

Secondly, you overlooked gay women in your response. Not all gay people are male.

Thirdly, not all gay men practice anal sex. What evidence do you have to suggest otherwise?

Fourthly, what evidence do you have that anal sex is 'un-natural'? You are the one suggesting otherwise, prove it or retract it.

Fifthly, what makes you think that homosexual couples would be likely to have sex in front of children?

Sixthly, simply declaring that a desire to inclusive and respectful is 'gay white knighting' does not make it true.

I made no attempts to ostracize or convert any gay person from their lifestyle, which is widely accepted and defended. But I put forth my own lifestyle choices of what I believe to be proper and acceptable and give solicited advice about how I handle similar situations around my kid and people act like I'm the devil...

Seventhly, if you don't think all the assumptions, generalisations and ignorance in your post ostracizes people then you don't know what the word means.

Eightly, your reference to 'lifestyle choices' prompts a question. Are you suggesting that being gay is a 'choice'?

Finally, suggesting that people who disagree with you should 'pipe down' without actually presenting a reasonable alternative position is just a way avoiding having to justify your position.

[Stubby]

It would be inappropriate for them to be physically affectionate in front of children.

Save it for your private life, Children do not need to be exposed to it, and heteros dont want to see it.

Bash me for not being politically correct if you want, but Most people secretly agree with me, I am just telling it straight.

Doesn't bother me in the slightest.

If you want to avoid criticism for 'not being politically correct' it is perhaps advisable to avoid such generalisations.

[Foxtrot0245]

@Sci-2: You're right, my bad.

@TerraPrime: Fuck off with your toxic mark bullshit. It's an opinion I have, not a disease. My opinion is as valid as yours and I belong here as much as you.

@everyone: think about the hypocrisy of telling a man he's wrong and terrible for having his own beliefs just because you assume he's a man that would tell the LBGT community that they are wrong and terrible for having their own beliefs.

@Stubby: I really do understand what Sci-2 was getting at, so PM me about your overly defensive and assumptive rant, one topic at a time, if possible. Thanks.

[Lord Flashheart]

^

[Stubby]

@Sci-2: You're right, my bad.

@TerraPrime: Fuck off with your toxic mark bullshit. It's an opinion I have, not a disease. My opinion is as valid as yours and I belong here as much as you.

@everyone: think about the hypocrisy of telling a man he's wrong and terrible for having his own beliefs just because you assume he's a man that would tell the LBGT community that they are wrong and terrible for having their own beliefs.

@Stubby: I really do understand what Sci-2 was getting at, so PM me about your overly defensive and assumptive rant, one topic at a time, if possible. Thanks.

You asked why you were treated the way you were. I told you.

Live with it.

[TerraPrime]

@TerraPrime: Fuck off with your toxic mark bullshit. It's an opinion I have, not a disease. My opinion is as valid as yours and I belong here as much as you.

Antigay bigots these day are so defensive. It's like they lack the moral conviction anymore. You do know that telling someone to "fuck off" is a flame, though, right? And can get your post deleted and a warning issued to you. Just a friendly reminder.

[Foxtrot0245]

@TerraPrime: this could have been PM'ed to me, but you wanted to call me out on the thread. I made a statement about what I believe to be appropriate public behavior for heterosexuals as well as homosexuals. I made no allusions to sin, corruption, wrongdoing, gay marriage rights, anything WBC-esque, or anything else that should lead you to believe that there is any form of bigotry going on in this discussion. We have had no discussion of gay rights, the history or legitimacy of homosexuality, or the ability for a same sex couple to raise a child. We simply disagree on public decorum. Please keep that in mind if you feel the need to continue unfairly judging me. Via PM if you will, please.

[karaddin]

A normal couple making out and being all lovey-dovey in front of a kid would be weird. Two guys doing the same in front of your kids would be even weirder. Tell your friends that it's inappropriate, or just leave the kids with a sitter if you really must go.

@TerraPrime: this could have been PM'ed to me, but you wanted to call me out on the thread. I made a statement about what I believe to be appropriate public behavior for heterosexuals as well as homosexuals. I made no allusions to sin, corruption, wrongdoing, gay marriage rights, anything WBC-esque, or anything else that should lead you to believe that there is any form of bigotry going on in this discussion. We have had no discussion of gay rights, the history or legitimacy of homosexuality, or the ability for a same sex couple to raise a child. We simply disagree on public decorum. Please keep that in mind if you feel the need to continue unfairly judging me. Via PM if you will, please.

Could you please explain how the bolded in your initial post is indicative of a judgement of homosexual men. Yes there is wiggle room, perhaps two women kissing is equal to heterosexuals in your view, but you are still imposing a more strict judgement upon 2 men than a man and a woman.

And once again, it's very much NOT answering the original question:

I understood the question and put forth my method for handling a situation like this. My answer did not fit into the close-ended format of the question, but it is still a valid submittal.

It didn't fit into the format of the question because it goes against the very motivation of the question. Skunk specified she wants to raise her kids to be tolerant and has no problems with appropriate displays of affection, and stated that according to her standards nothing inappropriate will take place. The different attitude towards heterosexual couples and homosexual couples goes against her explicitly stated motivation, and you also ignore the boundaries she places on what she considers appropriate behaviour. Your response is not addressing the question that she asked.

You then proceeded to make more offensive comments when this was called out. No doubt you will also dismiss this post of mine as a judgemental rant, but you asked and I'm being extremely civil.

[TerraPrime]

Why on earth would I call you out on your bullshit in private when you threw that all over the forum in public for all to see? You have a bizarre train of thought.

You stated your opinion, and I stated my opinion of your opinion. What's the problem? Stubby raised all the valid criticisms to your little jibes. If you have any genuine desire to discuss anything, rather than simply standing on your soapbox, you've got a place to start. That doesn't seem like someone looking for a discussion, but more like someone getting upset because his opinions are challenged.

[Pebble thats Stubby]

Foxtrot Telling moderators to fuck off is not normally healthy for your posting rights ;)

also your comment about Hetro's don't want to see it implies that hetro's don't want to see gay couples being affectionate but have no problems with straight couples. which is why your getting this attention.

If you meant most people no matter of sexual orientation don't like to see public acts of affection, then that's totally another matter. I'd disagree with you on the most people part through. (but that depends on the particular act of affection) maybe you should state what level off affection between any couple is too much for you?

Holding hands?

Hugging?

Sitting in close proximity to each other (maybe even touching?)

saying I love you?

a quick kiss?

Snogging?

I'm sure most people don't mind seeing any of the above - some may object to snogging in public places. however since Skunkbelly is sharing a beach hut I'm sure that that counts more as semi-private/public so are more likley to see a little more affection. I'd guess her kids are likely to see as much affection between the gay couple as they see between their parents. And I really don't see any problem with that.

Skunkbelly, I would tell your friends that your kids have spent an extended time with a gay couple so may have innocent questions, but that shouldn't change their behavior in any way.

[Nas!]

Have faith in your kids. Answer any of their questions honestly. You're probably doing an awesome job, and have likely given them many of the tools they will need to understand and accept, but they will still need to confront the unfamiliar on their own in any case.

[delete this account pls]

Foxtrot, though I don't agree with you, here's an interesting study that supports some of your anecdotal evidence, at least.

[Foxtrot0245]

Haha, I think everyone would agree that would be inappropriate to do in public.

Idk what you typed in, but that Google search must have been gnarly.

[Nas!]

Haha, I think everyone would agree that would be inappropriate to do in public.

Idk what you typed in, but that Google search must have been gnarly.

Actually, if you join his mailing list, Brady will email you that .gif every day for the rest of your life.

[Guy Kilmore]

To the OP,

I wouldn't worry about it. If a question is asked answer it and move on. If you want it to be normal, which it is, then the kids will pick-up on your "normalcy aura." This area is kind of in the place of kids seeing a pregnant lady and asking where baby's come from, just one of those things that we gotta explain sometime.

[Guy Kilmore]

Actually, if you join his mailing list, Brady will email you that .gif every day for the rest of your life.

Twice a day on Sundays, Holidays and Birthdays.

[Nas!]

Twice a day on Sundays, Holidays and Birthdays.

Ah, I see we made the same mistake.

[karaddin]

Foxtrot - I haven't seen you retract your comment about two men being inappropriate is more weird than a heterosexual couple (acknowledging you are declaring the behaviour of both inappropriate), then stating you didn't say anything judging homosexuals. If what you meant to do was retract that and go with you just have high standards for what is appropriate in front of children regardless of the couple, then I'm a lot more OK with that but I think you should explicitly say that.