I don't get Sansa's dislike for Tyrion

[Pod The Impaler]

What makes you think Tyrion cared least about her claim? Other than Littlefinger, he was probably the one most motivated by it.

The degree to which he wanted the marriage had little to do with her claim per se; he was being obedient to Tywin, but it was Casterly Rock he wanted. I got the feeling he resented her being used to destroy her own family (through him), resented that Joffrey would benefit so undeservedly, and also that he was sort of being told he'd only ever have a lesser prize, never the one that would make him a true Lannister. Whenever he thinks of Winterfell, he seems only able to think of how alien it would be to live there, and full of unending hostility. Consequently, we see the only positive thoughts he has about his impending lordship are that A) it will be extremely far away from his father, Joffrey, Cersei, etc., and B ) once he's away from them, maybe just maybe one day his wife will not loathe the sight of him. Tyrion is still loyal to his family at the time, but by the wedding his loyalty is diminishing rapidly, and after his marriage this accelerates; he seems increasingly interested in protecting her from his family rather than just knocking her up to steal her claim as they demand from him.

Perhaps only the Hound counts as one person more uninterested in her claim (despising the highborn in his way, and having no real personal ambitions besides killing Gregor), but he was never a revealed suitor.

Compare that to the other people I listed, those who really do view Sansa as a claim first and a person second.

[Silverin]

The degree to which he wanted the marriage had little to do with her claim per se; he was being obedient to Tywin, but it was Casterly Rock he wanted.

In the chapter with the tyrion tywin conversation, to me it is compeletly obvious that tyrion is tempted by Winterfell and that is why he agress. He sais very well father, after he gets the queer chill thinking about being "Lord of WInterfell", and also tywin sais to him he will never get CR. Also Tywin doesn't order tyrion, he sais if he doesn't want to marry Sansa he will continue looking until he meets with someone (a lesser lord's daughter) who would marry tyrion and whom tyrion would want to marry. He could have marry someone whose family was not destryed by his, and thus wouldn't forever have a grudge against him, but she probably wouldn't have been from a very powerful house (and might wouldn't even be attractive).

Also tyrion didn't marry Sansa because someone from his family had to, and him marrying her he would have protected her yadda, yadda since he was fully prepeared to go with the bedding and only at the very last moment did he decided to not go with it, and also such thing is never in his pov only way later after he realises how dangerous Joffrey is, it is not a factor in the decision, also Sansa marrying Lancel would have been better in that case since Lancel wouldn't be in KL, while tyrion as the Maester of Coin was bound to KL, so in that scenrio Sansa would be safer to be married to Lancel (who as we know had a religious awekening, so even with him the bedding very possibly wouldn't have happened), not to mention Joffrey hates tyrion's guts, so Sansa being his wife, just makes Joff want to hurt her more. But him getting the chill at Winterfell, and later calling himself Lord of Winterfell is there (you might don't think this, but so many delulu fans, who cannot accept that tyrion was selfsh and not prince charming to Sansa put these words, he never thought into his brain...).

The whole chapter is about tywin and kevan trying to tempt tyrion, that for him marrying Sansa is the best option, it is not an order, no matter how much you try to whitewash tyrion, and wash away every responsibility from him.

[WeddinGuest]

Quite frankly I find the discussion of whether Tyrion was "forced" to marry Sansa rather irrelevant, because Sansa DOESN'T KNOW what led up to Tyrion agreeing to the match. For all she knows, he gladly jumped at the chance to become Lord of Winterfell. That's one pitfall of the POV structure, sometimes readers assume that everyone else knows what we know about the POV characters, which isn't true. And even when Sansa realizes that Tyrion is "just as terrified as I am", her response to that is PITY, not desire, indeed she states "pity was death to desire".

[DJIM]

I think Sansa's treatment of Tyrion was very realistic. Her family was harmed by the Lannisters, she is held prisoner by them and she was forced to marry the ugliest of them. She can't know that Tyrion was not responsible for her family's demise. I think when she matures more she will realise that Tyrion was one of the few people in Kings Landing who cared about her well being.

[Lyanna Stark]

Forced? Tyrion forced Sansa to marry him? Where did you get the impression that Tyrion forced Sansa to marry him? In fact, I specifically remember him never wanting to marry her at all, yet he was still made to do it by his father and the Lannisters, and I suspect that Sansa was wise enough to realize that. While I agree that the marriage stripped her of her identity, I don't think that Sansa would have placed the blame on Tyrion for that, nor does he deserve it.

Edit: After thinking about it, I'm starting to suspect that he wasn't actually forced to marry her. Not how I remembered it, but hell, my memory of that book is starting to get hazy so I'm probably wrong. If so, how was he not forced to marry her?

"Made" as in "convinced" yes. Tywin threatened him with Lollys, the horror!

Sansa is not "wise" enough to realise anything in Kings Landing about the larger political picture as it is in the text stated that she is kept isolated.

Tyrion could have married Lollyd, or if he'd been a bit clever, maybe tried to organise a marriage himself to some Lord's daughter that would be suitable. I'm sure Lord Frey had a couple of spares, for instance. However, Tyrion was a. convinced by Tywin to marry Sansa b. could have refused. Jaime refused Tywin and Tywin....threw a strop. Yes. But no harm came to Jaime. Or Tyrion could just have married Lollys.

But Sansa is a better prize, despite being not yet 13 at the time. With her comes Winterfell, which gave Tywion a "queer chill" to think of as his domain. Of course, what Tyrion didn't think of, being busy with how this would benefit himself with a huge estate and a pretty young wife, was that for Sansa, it would mean confinement to the South for ever. She would never be able to go back as the Northerners hate Lannisters, and it would mean Tyrion's divorce from her by axe.

Tyrion even states himself in another chapter that Tywin's gifts are always poisoned, and in this case, this is absolutely true.

[Errant Bard]

She can't know that Tyrion was not responsible for her family's demise. I think when she matures more she will realise that Tyrion was one of the few people in Kings Landing who cared about her well being.

She is plenty mature, and already knows that Tyrion cared somewhat. She thinks about it in the Eyrie, but that does not make Tyrion innocent of her family demise, or not a Lannister, or an attractive guy.

Let's not forget Tyrion was hand of the king for a while, sent expeditions to spring Jaime out, swore to exchange Jaime for Sansa while not thinking a word of it, swore to burn the Vale to the ground, helped crush Stannis, protected Jaime, Cersei and Joffrey even though he knew about the incest, and accepted to marry Sansa even though he knew she did not want it.

The implication that only immaturity makes her dislike this marriage and fail to like Tyrion more than she does already is annoying. Surely then Tyrion would also be immature for not wanting Penny or Lollys.

[Modesty Lannister]

I am surprised by the amount of arguments in this thread that use modern standards of marriage and apply them to a Medieval Westerosy society. First of all, Sansa is educated to be an obedient wife. She knows from day one that she may have no choice in the matter. Marriage is duty, not choice or pleasure. Love and marriage seldom match. GRRM discusses this issue through Robb/Cat and Dany/Selmy's musings about duty, love and marriage. On the top of it, Sansa is not a proper lady any more. She is a hostage and a daughter of the official traitor. Therefore, she has no say what-so-ever in the matter of marriage and she knows it. She seems totally unaware of her importance as the heir of Winterfell, which (and I do apologise to Sansa fans) shows she is not the sharpest knife in the KL kitchen. She is obsessed with escaping KL and a direct influence of Cersei whom she dreads. That's why she is excited about Highgarden, although she is being offered to marry a cripple. She also yearns to belong to some pack once more and Margaery Tyrell offers her that illusion. Tyrion is not only a dwarf, he is also a member of the Lannister pack. By showing him any affection, Sansa would desert her original Stark pack and lose her identity. She is aware Tyrion is not her enemy. However, obedience to him would be obedience to the Lannister pack and the ultimate treason of her own Stark heritage. Tyrion allows her her little rebellion and she relishes in it, because it keeps her grounded in her identity. So, nothing personal, just house loyalty. And that is also expected in the Westerosy society.

[Lord Bronn Stokeworth]

I won't bother echoing the many great points that have been made about why Sansa "disliked" Tyrion. I don't think she really disliked him but certainly didn't have any affection for him, nor was she obligated to.

(ETA: Also, it's not exactly as if Tyrion actually had any affection for Sansa, or thinks of her much after ASOS. Tyrion's pride may have been wounded, but not his heart. He was nicer to Sansa than Joff and Cersei, yes, but...are we really championing Nice Guy Syndrome here, where men think just being Nice somehow obligates a girl to dispense love, sex, and affection like a vending machine?)

But regarding the side topic of why Tyrion was still unmarried by the time of ASOS, I think that:

(1) Tywin had likely only "shopped" Tyrion as a prospective groom to families he thought "deserving" of a Lannister, but these families were high-ranking enough to say "thanks but no thanks". Sure he doesn't care about Tyrion as a person but he still cares about the rep of his House. (See how he trolled Sybelle Spicer into thinking her son would get to marry a "bride from Casterly Rock", but the prospective bride turns out to be a bastard, while he rewards the Spicers with Castamere, he certainly didn't find "up-jumped merchants" worthy of marrying a trueborn Lannister. (As for Joy Hill being promised to both the Westerlings/Spicers and Freys, I assume Tywin did so knowing Sybelle would reject the idea of a "Westerling marrying a bastard", and he could say "well I kept my promise but the foolish woman refused my offer, so here ol'Walder, a pretty bride for one of your bastards".)

(2) Tyrion is only about 25 years old in ASOS, and that's certainly not considered too old for a man to wed; Brandon Stark, the uncontested son and heir of House Stark, was still unwed at age 20. So, Tywin might not even have bothered to look that seriously at any realistic candidates.

(3) Not only is Tyrion's disability an issue, dwarfism can certainly be passed on to future generations. Most highborn marriages are expected to eventually produce children. Since everyone knows Tyrion "killed" his mother at birth, many prospective father-in-laws would likely fear any child fathered by Tyrion would also be a dwarf. Some of the more decent fathers might actually care enough about their daughters not to marry them off to a man whose child could "kill" them in the same way Tyrion "killed" Joanna. Some might even assume that Tyrion is sterile -- after all, despite all his whoring, we don't hear of any bastards.

(4) All this being said, Tywin does say that if Tyrion doesn't marry Sansa he'll marry him to Lollys or some "little lordling's daughter", so I'm sure he could have found some relatively low-ranking noble who thought even a dwarf Lannister was a great option for a daughter. I do suspect he hadn't really looked, though.

1. I actually believe that is a mistake.

“Mention was made of a match for him as well. A bride from Casterly Rock. Your lord father said that Raynald should have joy of him, if all went as we hoped.”

Even from the grave, Lord Tywin’s dead hand moves us all. “Joy is my late uncle Gerion’s natural daughter. A betrothal can be arranged, if that is your wish, but any marriage will need to wait. Joy was nine or ten when last I saw her.”

The "joy" Sybelle Westerling speaks of is lower case. It's possible Tywin was using sly word play. But I honestly think he was planning on giving him some Lannister girl from a cadet branch or something. It seems like a mistake he wouldn't make (promising Joy to two people), and I doubt he knows Sybelle well enough or thinks her high enough to know she would refuse a Lannister bastard. It's also possible that Tywin didn't phrase it like that at all and that's just Sybelle's word choice.

But Jaime just hears, "joy" and gets it confused with Joy. Thus the "promised to two men" Joy Hill currently finds herself (well, I think Sybelle's son is dead so it doesn't really matter).

[WeddinGuest]

She seems totally unaware of her importance as the heir of Winterfell, which (and I do apologise to Sansa fans) shows she is not the sharpest knife in the KL kitchen.

What? Of course she is aware of it, though she may try to deny it at times. (Also, note that Sansa isn't actually the heir of Winterfell until fairly late in her story arc, she only becomes "heir" post-RW, after it becomes "public" that Robb, Bran, Rickon, and Arya are all dead; the fake Arya doesn't turn up until after Sansa has fled KL.) She knows the Lannisters want to wed her to Tyrion for "my claim" as soon as Cersei tells her. She also realizes that the Tyrell's offer has the same motivation. (Speaking of Book!Sansa, not Show!Sansa).

Tyrion is not only a dwarf, he is also a member of the Lannister pack. By showing him any affection, Sansa would desert her original Stark pack and lose her identity. She is aware Tyrion is not her enemy. However, obedience to him would be obedience to the Lannister pack and the ultimate treason of her own Stark heritage.

Hmm...but if Tyrion isn't her enemy, then why would obedience to him be "treason"? Though perhaps I misread, and your point is that Sansa doesn't see Tyrion as a personal enemy, the way she does, say, Joff, but she still sees him as a political enemy, as a member of House Lannister. I'd agree with you if that's what you meant.

ETA: Lord Bronn Stokeworth, it's certainly also possible that Tywin meant for Raynald to marry some other "bride from Casterly Rock"; other than the Lannisport branch, there's also Kevan's youngest daughter Janei, though she is only two years old; making the Westerlings wait a decade before marrying off their heir, or at least to ensure that heir can get around to making his own heirs, would also be a subtle way of putting them in their place. It's also possible that Jaime jumped to conclusions, or is even trolling Sybelle himself. And it's also possible (though I try to consider this last) that GRRM himself just messed up and made a continuity error, as he has with other fairly minor issues such as the color of Renly's eyes, the wideness of Jeyne's hips, etc.

[Qhorin Halfhand and Yoren]

I think in some regards Tyrion goes the extra mile in behaving towards Sansa with more kindness than most would do in his position. Even in going against his king or what the Lannisters want which does carry some personal risk for him. Now the motives are not entirely about Sansa but it plays a role. Not being as morally corrupt as, does deserve credit because I don't think being a good guy when there is pressure against that is the default. Nor when your family is corrupt.

But it does not deserve too much credit, the good does not wash away the bad. Since however Tyrion still is a Lannister and still played sided with his family against hers, still is part of the Lannister plot to get the north. And she is a hostage forced into marriage by violence. She might even die once the Lannisters get a heir. I don't think her reactions are unfair or unrealistic. Her coldness is also justified due to her grieving and the general unpleasantry of her situation. And I think she is being fair when she awknowledges that Tyrion was kind considering the situation and his position as a Lannister.

[Modesty Lannister]

What? Of course she is aware of it, though she may try to deny it at times. (Also, note that Sansa isn't actually the heir of Winterfell until fairly late in her story arc, she only becomes "heir" post-RW, after it becomes "public" that Robb, Bran, Rickon, and Arya are all dead; the fake Arya doesn't turn up until after Sansa has fled KL.) She knows the Lannisters want to wed her to Tyrion for "my claim" as soon as Cersei tells her. She also realizes that the Tyrell's offer has the same motivation. (Speaking of Book!Sansa, not Show!Sansa).

Hmm...but if Tyrion isn't her enemy, then why would obedience to him be "treason"? Though perhaps I misread, and your point is that Sansa doesn't see Tyrion as a personal enemy, the way she does, say, Joff, but she still sees him as a political enemy, as a member of House Lannister. I'd agree with you if that's what you meant.

ETA: Lord Bronn Stokeworth, it's certainly also possible that Tywin meant for Raynald to marry some other "bride from Casterly Rock"; other than the Lannisport branch, there's also Kevan's youngest daughter Janei, though she is only two years old; making the Westerlings wait a decade before marrying off their heir, or at least to ensure that heir can get around to making his own heirs, would also be a subtle way of putting them in their place. It's also possible that Jaime jumped to conclusions, or is even trolling Sybelle himself. And it's also possible (though I try to consider this last) that GRRM himself just messed up and made a continuity error, as he has with other fairly minor issues such as the color of Renly's eyes, the wideness of Jeyne's hips, etc.

As I say, it's nothing personal, it's just house loyalty. Even if Tyrion was as handsome as Rhaegar, Sansa should be expected to defy him, because he is a Lannister, a member of the house responsible for deaths of her father, mother, brother and, as far as she knows, her sister as well. Since Tyrion doesn't treat her like a hostage and a whore, she has more space to show her defience. However, she never defies him in public (wedding aside). She is too prudent and well bred for that.

[Queen Sansa Stark]

It has certainly nothing to do with looks. Jaime was the first lannister she started to hate. She called him before she was disillusioned the "Wicked uncle of prince Joffrey".

[DrunkSister]

She does deserve a lightsaber.

Thirded!

[Raksha 2014]

She's not wondering what's expected of her in the context of being a dutiful wife. She's wondering what she has to do next because she's just been forced into a marriage and knows that there's very little she can do to avoid having to be raped by a man designated as her lawful husband. Martin spells it out in the text:

Notice the shuddering and the "dreading what might come next"? She wonders about Tyrion will do, and is absolutely horrified at the prospect. There is nothing contradictory going on. And certainly over the course of their brief time together she does not waver from her decision or think about fulfilling any duties as a wife. Tyrion is the one who should be described as having a "contradictory mess" going on in his head. As for making her own rules, exactly how is she supposed to do that as a captive with very limited agency?

You can bet that neither Sansa's septa or mother ever taught her the proper behavior for a hostage bride wed to a physically repulsive dwarf member of the House that is not only holding her captive but has killed her father and is warring against her brother. It's not like Sansa's 18, 20, 25 or even 16 years old so as she might have a tad more maturity that could help her figure out what to do; but even if she were older, she's in a very unexpected and awkward position, so it's no wonder she falls back on the rules of wifely compliance, with a bit of defiance thrown in when she can manage it.

[Pod The Impaler]

1. I actually believe that is a mistake.

“Mention was made of a match for him as well. A bride from Casterly Rock. Your lord father said that Raynald should have joy of him, if all went as we hoped.”

Even from the grave, Lord Tywin’s dead hand moves us all. “Joy is my late uncle Gerion’s natural daughter. A betrothal can be arranged, if that is your wish, but any marriage will need to wait. Joy was nine or ten when last I saw her.”

The "joy" Sybelle Westerling speaks of is lower case. It's possible Tywin was using sly word play. But I honestly think he was planning on giving him some Lannister girl from a cadet branch or something. It seems like a mistake he wouldn't make (promising Joy to two people), and I doubt he knows Sybelle well enough or thinks her high enough to know she would refuse a Lannister bastard. It's also possible that Tywin didn't phrase it like that at all and that's just Sybelle's word choice.

But Jaime just hears, "joy" and gets it confused with Joy. Thus the "promised to two men" Joy Hill currently finds herself (well, I think Sybelle's son is dead so it doesn't really matter).

I don't think Jaime was confused at all. Perhaps Tywin was going to reward them better for their treachery, but Jaime disliked them and used the opportunity to put them in their place.

[Lee-Sensei]

What? Of course she is aware of it, though she may try to deny it at times. (Also, note that Sansa isn't actually the heir of Winterfell until fairly late in her story arc, she only becomes "heir" post-RW, after it becomes "public" that Robb, Bran, Rickon, and Arya are all dead; the fake Arya doesn't turn up until after Sansa has fled KL.) She knows the Lannisters want to wed her to Tyrion for "my claim" as soon as Cersei tells her. She also realizes that the Tyrell's offer has the same motivation. (Speaking of Book!Sansa, not Show!Sansa).

As I recall, Dontos tried to warn her that the Tyrells only cared about her claim to Winterfell and she ignored him.

[Errant Bard]

As I recall, Dontos tried to warn her that the Tyrells only cared about her claim to Winterfell and she ignored him.

Nope, the Tyrells talks to her before Dontos does. Also, she does not ignore it, and that's a bloody shame, see below.

She seems totally unaware of her importance as the heir of Winterfell, which (and I do apologise to Sansa fans) shows she is not the sharpest knife in the KL kitchen.

Yes, she does not think of it at first, however:

"Yes. You are a ward of the crown. The king stands in your father's place, since your brother is an attainted traitor. That means he has every right to dispose of your hand. You are to marry my brother Tyrion."

My claim, she thought, sickened. Dontos the Fool was not so foolish after all; he had seen the truth of it.

[...]

I don't want any Lannister, she wanted to say. I want Willas, I want Highgarden and the puppies and the barge, and sons named Eddard and Bran and Rickon. But then she remembered what Dontos had told her in the godswood.

Tyrell or Lannister, it makes no matter, it's not me they want, only my claim. "You are kind, my lord," she said, defeated. "I am a ward of the throne and my duty is to marry as the king commands."

[...]

... How would you like to marry your cousin, the Lord Robert? "

The thought made Sansa weary. All she knew of Robert Arryn was that he was a little boy, and sickly. It is not me she wants her son to marry, it is my claim. No one will ever marry me for love. But lying came easy to her now. "I... can scarcely wait to meet him, my lady. But he is still a child, is he not?"

She is aware Tyrion is not her enemy.

That's the other way round, she is aware that he may be personally OK, but that he is her enemy nonetheless:

He speaks more gently than Joffrey, she thought, but the queen spoke to me gently too. He's still a Lannister, her brother and Joff's uncle, and no friend. Once she had loved Prince Joffrey with all her heart, and admired and trusted his mother, the queen. They had repaid that love and trust with her father's head. Sansa would never make that mistake again.

[Pod The Impaler]

You can bet that neither Sansa's septa or mother ever taught her the proper behavior for a hostage bride wed to a physically repulsive dwarf member of the House that is not only holding her captive but has killed her father and is warring against her brother. It's not like Sansa's 18, 20, 25 or even 16 years old so as she might have a tad more maturity that could help her figure out what to do; but even if she were older, she's in a very unexpected and awkward position, so it's no wonder she falls back on the rules of wifely compliance, with a bit of defiance thrown in when she can manage it.

Tyrion calls it correct when he thinks that if he forced the issue she would go through with it "dutifully, and weep no more than she must" - meaning there was no way she would act like a real & willing "wife", but rather like a prisoner who has no choice to submit to a rape if she wants to survive. Again, there was near zero ambiguity in his mind about what it would mean if she was unwilling; Tyrion had some forlorn hope kicking around inside his mind that maybe one day she would see him as a husband, not a captor, but at the same time, he knew this was folly, and he refused to go down the Tysha road again. (Which was probably the thing which surprised his family, since they would expect him to find it easier to hurt her because of what was done to Tysha.)

So... we're back to this. Sansa can recognize that Tyrion is not some typical Lannister goon planning to ravage her as soon as he can; at the same time, he's still a Lannister and she wants out of the "marriage" and to run away from them all. She doesn't have to dislike Tyrion in particular to feel what she does about her situation. It is not an "arranged" marriage - it is one forced on a prisoner of war by her enemies; big difference.

[Annara Snow]

I am surprised by the amount of arguments in this thread that use modern standards of marriage and apply them to a Medieval Westerosy society. 1) First of all, Sansa is educated to be an obedient wife. She knows from day one that she may have no choice in the matter. Marriage is duty, not choice or pleasure. Love and marriage seldom match. GRRM discusses this issue through Robb/Cat and Dany/Selmy's musings about duty, love and marriage. 2) On the top of it, Sansa is not a proper lady any more. She is a hostage and a daughter of the official traitor. Therefore, she has no say what-so-ever in the matter of marriage and she knows it. 3) She seems totally unaware of her importance as the heir of Winterfell, which (and I do apologise to Sansa fans) shows she is not the sharpest knife in the KL kitchen. She is obsessed with escaping KL and a direct influence of Cersei whom she dreads. That's why she is excited about Highgarden, although she is being offered to marry a cripple. She also yearns to belong to some pack once more and Margaery Tyrell offers her that illusion. Tyrion is not only a dwarf, he is also a member of the Lannister pack. By showing him any affection, Sansa would desert her original Stark pack and lose her identity. She is aware Tyrion is not her enemy. However, obedience to him would be obedience to the Lannister pack and the ultimate treason of her own Stark heritage. Tyrion allows her her little rebellion and she relishes in it, because it keeps her grounded in her identity. So, nothing personal, just house loyalty. And that is also expected in the Westerosy society.

1) I think you may be confusing Sansa with some other character. We have been following her thoughts since book 1. At no point does Sansa think to herself that she is going to be willing to marry someone she doesn't want just because it's her "duty". Catelyn did it, Ned did it, Dany did it even though she hated it. She may be aware somewhere deep inside that she doesn't have a choice or that Joffrey is not Aemon the Dragonknight, but she sure never thinks of it that way consciously. She definitely never thinks in AGOT that marriage will be just some loveless union or a duty she will perform, however she feels about it. No, quite the opposite. She's a dreamer and a romantic, she thinks she will have a great love with Joffrey like Naerys and Aemon the Dragonknight (who were actually not married, and queen Naerys was miserable in a loveless marriage; Sansa ignored the fact that the great romances from the songs were usually not between people married to each other). And she was completely infatuated with Joffrey, or rather, with her idea of Joffrey and the idea of love.

And when her father then told her she was to go back and that she will not marry Joffrey, but someone else, "someone worthy of her", what did she do? Was she a dutiful and obedient daughter? Nope. She disobeyed her father and went to Cersei (because she was scared of Robert) in order to get what she wanted and get to marry who she thought she wanted.

(This, of course, is a source of a lot of Sansa-hate, because she supposedly "betrayed" her father, but it's one of the things that make AGOT Sansa more interesting to me than the show version of Sansa at that point. She is not dutiful and obedient. She only has to act that way later when she's a hostage and has to act submissive to survive.)

Try telling AGOT Sansa that love and marriage don't mix; she wouldn't want to know. In ACOK and ASOS, she's gradually understanding it, but she is still hopeful: she agrees to marry Willas because she is desperate, but she still wants to believe that she can "make him" love her, and that she will be attracted to him, and that they will come to love each other (like Ned and Cat did) and constructs an entire fantasy about this wonderful life she will have with him. Once she realizes that it was a futile fantasy and that "no one will ever marry me for love", she feels that she doesn't want to marry, perhaps never again. Not because she doesn't want marriage at all, but because she doesn't want a loveless marriage.

Marriage out of love is not the standard or the usual thing in Westeros by any means. Yet Sansa wants it. And she doesn't tell herself that she "must do her duty" to Tyrion. Re-read the scene. It's funny that so many people fail to notice this. The only person who mentions duty is Tyrion: "Sansa, we must do our duty". Sansa thinks that she has "promised to obey", but there's no indication that this is out of any kind of sense of duty, as opposed to her hostage situation. She thinks that Septa Mordane was wrong about all men being beautiful, she thinks about Tyrion's ugliness, and she feels that even though she doesn't hate him but feel pity for him, "pity is the death of desire". Note: Sansa expects to feel desire for her husband if she is to have sex with him.

2) Um, not "on top of it". Because of it. The idea that she was so "dutiful" and the fact that she was a prisoner/hostage was just some kind of an "additional" reason is ludicrous and rather offensive, IMO. Hostages don't obey their kidnappers because they're stupid, cowardly sheep who have been raised to obey their masters and not have a mind of their own. :rolleyes: They do it because there is a constant threat of death and bodily harm hanging over them. They do it to survive.

Sansa feels no duty to her "husband" Tyrion or the Lannisters at all. She's scared and knows she has no choice, because, as Cersei told her with two big KGs by her side, she could kick and scream, but she would be wedded and raped bedded either way. During her marriage, she asking herself why Tyrion wouldn't just leave her alone. She was planning to get away from KL all the time, and once she was out of there, she felt zero obligation to continue the "mockery of a marriage" as she refers to it.

3) WeddinGuest and others have already covered this. What books have you been reading?! Sansa - who is not even the immediate heir to WF before the RW - is perfectly aware that the Lannisters want to steal her claim when she is forced to marry Tyrion, and after Dontos points it out, she finally admits to herself that her claim was what the Tyrells were after, too. She immediately realizes that Lysa wants to marry her to her son not because she likes her or cares for her as a person, but because of her claim. "No one will ever marry me for love", she thinks to herself sadly, and it's her prevalent feeling in ASOS and AFFC - she is sick and tired of being auctioned off for her claim.

[Lee-Sensei]

Nope, the Tyrells talks to her before Dontos does. Also, she does not ignore it, and that's a bloody shame, see below.Yes, she does not think of it at first, however:

"Yes. You are a ward of the crown. The king stands in your father's place, since your brother is an attainted traitor. That means he has every right to dispose of your hand. You are to marry my brother Tyrion."

My claim, she thought, sickened. Dontos the Fool was not so foolish after all; he had seen the truth of it.

[...]

I don't want any Lannister, she wanted to say. I want Willas, I want Highgarden and the puppies and the barge, and sons named Eddard and Bran and Rickon. But then she remembered what Dontos had told her in the godswood.

Tyrell or Lannister, it makes no matter, it's not me they want, only my claim. "You are kind, my lord," she said, defeated. "I am a ward of the throne and my duty is to marry as the king commands."

That's the other way round, she is aware that he may be personally OK, but that he is her enemy nonetheless:

He speaks more gently than Joffrey, she thought, but the queen spoke to me gently too. He's still a Lannister, her brother and Joff's uncle, and no friend. Once she had loved Prince Joffrey with all her heart, and admired and trusted his mother, the queen. They had repaid that love and trust with her father's head. Sansa would never make that mistake again.

That's what I was saying. When she told Ser Dontos that she was going to marry Willas, he told her that they only care about her claim, but she ignores him.